Getting Ghosted? 8 Signs the Person You’re Dating Might Ghost You

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It’s never fun to get ghosted. Whether you’ve been dating for a while or have just been talking online, when someone disappears out of nowhere it can leave you dwelling over what went wrong.

Ghosting (which is one of many modern dating terms) occurs when someone abruptly cuts off communication with another person without any explanation.

From will-they-won’t-they situations to on-again-off-again friendships, ghosting has become particularly common after dating during the pandemic. But what, exactly, makes someone likely to ghost?

According to Psychology Today, research shows that these are the eight factors that make someone more likely to ghost in a relationship.

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They’re avoidant

A 2019 study by Gili Freedman et al. shows that those that ghost likely have avoidant personalities. So, while it may not come as a surprise, your average ghoster wants to stay away from conflict and difficult conversations – all of which are a part of a communicative breakup.

If you’re not sure if the person you’re dating has an avoidant attachment style, there are signs you can look out for, from thinking everyone is too clingy to sweeping things under the rug.

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They’re young

A 2020 study from Elisabeth Timmermans et al. found that the younger you are, the more likely you are to ghost. So, as Psychology Today highlights, “the odds of ghosting go up as age goes down.” Not such good news for Gen Z, who are already having a tough time dating due to inflation.

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They blame things on destiny

If the person you’re dating places a lot of weight on the idea of destiny – or the idea that partners either are or are not “meant to be” – they’re more likely to ghost you (Freedman et al.). Someone with strong destiny beliefs is more likely to spontaneously abandon ship if they don’t believe that the relationship was written in the stars.

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They struggle with anxiety

A partner that grapples with anxiety is more likely to fear the fallout of a breakup or difficult conversation. Thus, as Freedman et al. discovered, they’re more likely to opt out of a breakup altogether, deciding to ghost instead.

They have safety concerns

A more recent study from Freedman, Hales et al. found that a person is more likely to ghost you when they’re worried that you’ll get angry, yell or verbally abuse them. Further, if there are concerns about physical violence, a person will be even more likely to ghost someone to protect their safety.

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Something has made them uncomfortable

In some cases, Timmermans et al. found that a person may ghost after receiving an unsolicited nude or other sexual material that made them uncomfortable or crossed their boundaries.

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You didn’t accept their reasons for leaving

If your partner tries to break up with you directly and you don’t accept their explanation or reason for leaving, they’re more likely to take a passive approach like ghosting (Timmermans et al.). Respecting your partner’s decision to leave will actually make them more likely to communicate with you about their needs and why they’re deciding to end the relationship.

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You have no shared social network

Lastly, it’s much easier for your prospective or current partner to ghost you if you don’t have a common network. If you have little chance of running into each other – especially if you have no friends in common and don’t have a linked work environment – the chances that your partner will ghost you are higher (Timmermans et al.)