Oscar-nominated actor, would-be hair model and Kid Cudi stan Timothée Chalamet is headed to the chocolate factory in an upcoming prequel about Roald Dahl’s most famous character, Willy Wonka.
Chalamet will take on the lead role of the eccentric chocolatier in Wonka, a musical film about the candy connoisseur’s life before opening his iconic factory. It’s the first time audiences will see Chalamet sing and dance (not counting any of his performances as ‘Lil Timmy Tim). Part of me is excited to see the Lady Bird actor show off his musical chops, but a much larger part of me is very, very afraid.
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To date, there have been two adaptations of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory — the 1971 version, Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, starring Gene Wilder, and the 2005 Johnny Depp-led Charlie and the Chocolate Factory — and I will bravely say that both films were extremely creepy. Hear me out; it’s not just the Oompa-Loompas that made me want to look away, but there’s something deeply unsettling about Wonka himself that I simply cannot move past.
I am convinced that he brought those kids to the factory to terrorize them for his own twisted entertainment. Honestly, when you take away the music and candy, you’re left with a man who is a villain in what could easily pass for a gateway horror film. If you watched this movie as a child, it’s much more dark than quirky, and easily more sinister than fun. Remember the boat scene? It was absolutely unhinged!
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I don’t think I’m emotionally ready to see Timmy skulking around while he sings, and I fear for whatever creepy twist they throw in that I just know will make me never look at him in the same way. My heart went out to him in Call Me By Your Name, broke for him in Beautiful Boy, and exploded for him in Little Women (it’s a fact that he was PERFECT as Laurie). All of that could quickly be undone the moment he steps into Wonka’s depraved shoes.
Chalamet was supposed to take over our screens last year in Wes Anderson’s The French Dispatch with his Lady Bird and Little Women co-star Saoirse Ronan, and was also tapped to close out the year as the lead in Denis Villeneuve’s Dune remake alongside Zendaya. Due to the pandemic, everything got pushed because, of course, we can’t have nice things. While anxiously waiting for news about those films, instead I am now picturing him in this video, which obviously lives in my mind rent-free.
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Wonka isn’t set for release until 2023, so I have lots of time to emotionally prepare myself should I choose to watch it. If it does turn out to be as wild as I’m envisioning, at least I can cleanse my spirit by scrolling through Chalamet’s photos on Instagram.
