12 Things Often Said to Women in the Workplace (But are Never OK)

Whether it’s comments surrounding a female co-worker’s weight, makeup, hairstyle or any general observation about their appearance, this kind of dialogue can very quickly create an uncomfortable situation — and in almost every instance, cross over professional boundaries. Believe it or not, many men still perceive comments about a woman’s appearance to be acceptable, so long as they are offered in some “complimentary” way. The fact is, unless there is some specific professionally-relevant point to be made, it is never OK to shine a spotlight on a woman’s physical appearance in the workplace.

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Look, we’re not saying workplace romances never work out, but it’s definitely awkward when a coworker tries to navigate something so personal in a professional environment. That being said, it’s probably not the best idea to be throwing pickup lines out at female co-workers, who will likely feel uncomfortable being put in the position to either shut down — and potentially offend — someone they work with (or for, in the case of a manager-to-employee scenario) or feel wary at making off-duty plans while still on-the-clock. If a person’s feelings are genuine, they should avoid making it awkward and make their pitch at a more appropriate time and place.

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Let’s get real for a second: in the age of #METOO, we’re definitely noticing a greater “awareness” on the part of men in terms of how they interact with women — and nowhere is that awareness more apparent than in workplace interactions. But there’s a case to be made against the borderline-patronizing hypersensitivity that some men have adopted in a bid to be “extra careful” around the opposite sex. We’re not made of glass — just treat us how you would like to be treated. Simple.

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Nicknames like “honey” and “sweetheart” may seem too outdated to still be an issue in 2019, and yet — it happens. Not only is it demeaning to refer to someone with a cheesy moniker like “honey”, it’s just plain rude.

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There’s nothing worse than feeling creeped out at work. While this one may seem painfully obvious, it continues to be an issue for many women in the workplace, who have to contend with male co-workers who seem to get a rise from making sexually-charged comments. This is never OK.

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This one is usually followed by the equally-infuriating implication that “it must be that time of the month” — excuse us while we punch a pillow. Not only is this kind of commentary sexist and inappropriate — in any setting — it’s also offensive at every level. When men in the workplace exhibit aggression or passion, it’s praised as “ambitious” behaviour, but when women do it, we are labelled as “emotional” — suffice it to say, in 2019, we couldn’t be more over this double standard.

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Few jobs exist that specify gender requirements, and yet, there are still people out there who will cite “being a woman” as one of the factors that sealed the deal in getting the job. Whether this has to do with the notion of “forced inclusivity” or the archaic idea that some work is just “women’s work”, it’s all ridiculous and entirely inappropriate. No one should feel entitled to diminish your professional achievements or abilities by whittling them down to gender-based successes.

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The implication that a woman’s place in the workforce must take a backseat to family once she “settles down” by getting married or having children, is super heteronormative and laughable. In 2019, both men and women are putting in the work to balance their personal and professional lives while putting to bed outdated notions of what it means to be a full-time parent and office-boss.

If we had a penny for every verbal-diarrhea story that started with incorrectly assuming someone is pregnant… Sometimes a food baby is just that, folks! Don’t get tongue-tied and risk mortifying your co-worker with a risky and, frankly, none-of-your-business question like this. If someone is in fact expecting, and they want to share it with their co-workers, wait for them to make that announcement before you put your foot in your mouth.

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There’s nothing more frustrating for women in the workplace — especially in 2019 — than feeling judged by unsolicited opinions on their “behaviour” by fellow co-workers — particularly men, who have less empathy for the different obstacles women face in a professional landscape. Telling a woman to be more or less of anything in regards to her personality or professional etiquette is both patronizing and inappropriate. It suggests the person making the comment has been watching with more interest than is professional, and somehow feels superior enough to assume a mentor-type role for someone who hasn’t asked.

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Whether from male co-workers or, possibly even worse, other females in the workplace, the use of the “b” word is one that’s been reserved for ambitious and assertive women for far too long. Rather than knocking someone down for exhibiting the same professional strengths that men are praised for, let’s find new terms to describe those female co-workers who are brave enough to break that glass ceiling and risk the judgment of less-enlightened coworkers.

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Circling back to our point on the offensive nature of hypersensitivity in the workplace, there is also the other extreme to that. Using the term feminist as an insult is silly and has no place in the workplace — and in a time where diversity, inclusion and representation is trending, the statement comes across tone deaf and embarrassing. So, shame on them for trying to make a love for equal rights and opportunity a bad thing.

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