When the line between friends and more-than-friends starts to blur, and you begin to feel things that definitely go beyond the platonic, it may be time for a little reflection. We’ve enlisted an expert to help you spot the signs that you might just be falling in love with your bff.
You seek attention from them above everyone else
Expert advice:Monitor the situation and see if the feelings stick around. “Sometimes we go through a phase of excitement with new friends as we discover each other, but if these feeling continue you are probably developing romantic feelings for that friend,” says Jones.
You primp extra hard when you know they will be there
Expert advice:Feelings or not, keep it authentic. “Try to stay true to your own self and not fall into trying to make yourself something you are not just to get their attention. If this is going anywhere further, you want to know that they are attracted to the true you. If they are attracted to you it will emerge and they will start to send signals as well – just trust this and do not try to control it by adapting yourself too much,” advises Jones.
Praise or compliments mean so much more coming from them
Expert advice:Read the room and see if the feelings are being felt on both ends. “If they respond similarly when you compliment them a mutual attraction may be emerging. If they do not seem to respond in any special way when you compliment them, you may want to raise your awareness and slow things down on your end as it may not be reciprocated,” says Jones. Stay true to you and always keep an eye out for signs you might be losing your identity in your relationship.
When a hug from them is so much more than just a hug
Expert advice:Jones advises tuning in and paying attention the next time it gets physical: “Are you hyper aware during the hug? Does the hug last longer when it is just the two of you? Have you had thoughts of kissing your friend when you are hugging him or her?”
Other people have started to spot the chemistry
Expert advice:Reflect on how the outside attention makes you feel — and also how your friend reacts. “If this keeps happening to you and people are commenting on the chemistry with your best friend look at how that makes you feel. Does that excite you and make you feel a little bit flirty, or does it feel awkward when they say that? In addition, pay attention to how your friend responds when people say you are a couple or should be. If they respond with flirty and fun comments, they may be developing feelings for you. If they seem shut down when others comment about your chemistry, they may only have platonic feelings for you.” Is it time to throw in the towel? Get a read on things with our healthy relationship checklist.
You want to be with them as much as possible
When every song on the radio becomes a love song that reminds you of them
Expert advice:Proceed with caution on those daydreams. “When we start to hear our own stories and feelings in song, and our fantasies start to focus on that special friend it is a sure sign that you are moving them from friend to lover in your mind. The caution here is you want to pay attention to how they are responding to you, because you do not want to begin to romanticize a friendship if it is just you who is experiencing the feelings,” says Jones.
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