10 Signs Your Partner is Planning to Divorce You

It’s easy to look back after a divorce, once the dust has settled, and say to yourself, ‘I should have seen it coming.’ Truth is, more likely than not, you really could have. When a partner is plotting to leave you, there are so many obvious telltale signs — and some not-so-obvious ones too. You may not be able to convince your partner to stay, but anticipating a divorce can at least give you time to equip yourself with the emotional tools and financial and legal advice to weather the storm.

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There’s a change in their language

Did your partner suddenly go from ‘we, we, we’ to ‘me, me, me?’ A change in your partner’s vocabulary can signal a shift in their outlook on life. It’s not a run-to-your-lawyer-and-hide-your-personal-savings kind of sign, but it’s definitely something to be mindful of. After all, we know words matter — and a change in vocabulary is a flag.

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They’re distancing themselves from friends and family

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They’re distancing themselves from friends and family

Your partner may not be able to hide from you if you’re still married and living together, but if divorce is on their mind, you might notice an unwillingness to join you on outings with friends and extended family. Call it guilt for what they’re about to do, or disconnecting from the life you’ve shared, either way, it signals a lack of commitment to you and your tribe.

RELATED: Is it time to break up? The healthy relationship checklist.

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3 / 10

There’s no talk of the future

If your partner can’t commit to sun, sand and a week of vacation sex — then you’ve definitely got a flight risk on your hands. When travel plans and discussions of the future stall, it’s a sign of major hesitation to commit to future plans without any real rhyme or reason is a major red flag.

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4 / 10

You’re not getting any social love

If Instagram offers a glimpse into someone’s idealized version of themselves, than a lack of social love from your partner (no couples photos in their feed, no comments or likes on your photos), offers a pretty clear glimpse into the inner workings of their heart (and this is one algorithm you can’t optimize against).

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You’re not getting any physical love either

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You’re not getting any physical love either

If Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get It On” is met with a blank stare from your partner, then it might be time to start questioning their libido (not to mention their taste in music, too). The cadence of sex is different for every couple, but you’ll know your benchmark, and if frequency is waning, it’s time to talk to your partner about how this is one of the top reasons why marriages fail.

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6 / 10

Shared passwords suddenly change

Most (not all) but most married couples share passwords. It just makes life easier (like when you want to pop into their phone to steal that great photo they took of you). So it’ll feel pretty alarming if you try one of those shared passwords and it’s suddenly changed. And if you’re partner stalls on sharing their updated password when you ask for it, that should definitely sound the alarm bells.

SEE ALSO: How to catch a cheater: 16 ways to spy on a cheating spouse.

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Your partner has unexplained absences

With near constant contact and tracking made possible with our phones, it’s rare for people not to know where their partner is every moment of the day. So when your spouse goes AWOL, and won’t explain where they disappeared to, it could be a tip off that they’re scheming a disappearing act...forever (dun, dun, dun…).

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Your partner suddenly looks amazing

When you married your partner, you both committed to loving each other in spite of an extra few pounds, early onset balding and evenings spent in sweatpants. So why are they suddenly looking so good? Whether it’s a recommitment to fitness, regular beauty treatments they’d let slide since the wedding day or a fresh new wardrobe, if your partner is fixating on their appearance, it might not be for your sake alone (read: they want to look good in their new Bumble profile)

SEE ALSO: 15 signs your partner is about to cheat.

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They won’t let go of things

Does your partner keep floating ideas that you’ve previously inlayed, leaving you feeling undermined and ignored? If your partner is ignoring your opinions and wishes, it likely won’t be long until they’re ignoring you completely. Decisions that impact the life you share should be joint decisions, and if your partner can’t respect that, maybe that’s a partner you don’t really want to be with anyway (amirite?).

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You’ve caught them meeting privately with your banks or lawyer

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You’ve caught them meeting privately with your banks or lawyer

If you discover your partner’s met privately with your bank, financial adviser or lawyer, and they won’t reveal why, you can bet they’re up to something sneaky...and it doesn’t include a surprise convertible in your driveway with a big, fancy red bow.

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