What’s worse — not knowing your spouse is cheating, or finding out that he/she has been, or is being, unfaithful? It sucks either way, but the worst is when you least expect it. And unless a philandering husband or wife wants you to find out, there are some things things they definitely don’t want you to know but there are signs that you should watch out for. Here are 10 things an unfaithful partner doesn’t want you to know, either because it’ll give you a leg up or give you ammo to use against them.
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1 / 10
They’re not trustworthy
They can say that they're never going to do it again until they're blue in the face but any spouse who keeps things from you — whether it's a sexual relationship on the side or financial problems or trouble at work — is NOT to be trusted. They can regain your trust, eventually, but through action, not words.
Suspect you have a cheater on your hands? Here are 19 ways to tell if someone is cheating on you.
Suspect you have a cheater on your hands? Here are 19 ways to tell if someone is cheating on you.

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2 / 10
They made the conscious choice to mess around
There's no way an affair can just happen, but they're going to do their darndest to justify it that way. It takes work to be in a devoted, faithful, loving relationship, but nothing good ever comes easily. It's the behaviour after a slip that will determine whether or not the marriage is worth fighting for.
Keep in mind, if you pick up on any one of these 9 signs your relationship is failing, they likely don't care to make things work.
Keep in mind, if you pick up on any one of these 9 signs your relationship is failing, they likely don't care to make things work.

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3 / 10
They know exactly why they did it
If they say they don't know when you question their motives, their cheating pants are on fire. Because they know. And whether it's because she thought it would be fun and didn't think she would get caught, or something worse, like he thought he was in love with him, whatever the reason is, there was a reason for the unfaithfulness.
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You may also like: celebrities who survived cheating and stayed together.

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4 / 10
They know what they did was wrong
Despite the excuses he/she might throw your way, they know what they did was a betrayal. And if they're more defensive than apologetic, that's just their way of trying to deflect blame. Don't let it work.
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Everyone makes mistakes in relationships, but these are the 20 things you should never do in a healthy relationship.

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5 / 10
They’re not telling you everything
Once an affair or indiscretion is first uncovered, don't believe you've heard the whole story. As time goes by, expect more details or revelations to come trickling out of their guilty mouths.
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You may also like: 22 of the messiest celebrity breakups ever.

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6 / 10
They liked having that sense of power
There's something about having a secret over someone, and wielding that power of whether to end it, reveal it or continue keeping it from that person that can be fun for the cheater.
If you suspect your beau might be cheating, read 10 ways to catch a cheater.
If you suspect your beau might be cheating, read 10 ways to catch a cheater.

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7 / 10
Their phone holds all the evidence
If you are within a foot of their phone, watch the claws come out. You'll be accused of being "paranoid" when you ask to look at it — even if it's for completely innocent reasons (though, at this point, you're probably suspecting something's off). But by turning the tables and making you seem like the "crazy" one is all for their advantage. If he/she has nothing to hide, then it shouldn't be a big deal.
Not every affair includes sex: 5 telltale signs you’re having an emotional affair.
Not every affair includes sex: 5 telltale signs you’re having an emotional affair.

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8 / 10
They’re going to make you the bad guy
They will attempt to shift the blame onto you, whether it's that you didn't want to have sex enough or you weren't paying enough attention to him. Even if there are pre-existing issues in the relationship that may have played a part, that's still no excuse. He/she made the choice to cheat, not you.
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You may also like: celebrities who saved themselves for marriage.

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9 / 10
This probably wasn’t their first time, nor will it be their last
Sadly, the whole "once a cheater, always a cheater" often applies and infidelity can become a pattern in a marriage. And if one does it multiple times, the other might say "Well, if she can do it, so can I?" But what kind of marriage is that?
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Some breakups are a long time coming. Check out 10 sneaky predictors you're heading for a breakup.

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10 / 10
They don’t want to talk about it anymore
The damage is done, the trust is gone (maybe not completely, but there will always be a little doubt) and if you still have questions or want to hash it out some more, they're not having it. If you get the stock reply, "I already said I was sorry, what else do you want from me?", then that means he/she is unwilling to invest any time in regaining your trust. Which means there'll be this cloud hanging over your marriage until it's settled. Whether that'll be enough for you, or you're ready to GTFO of the marriage depends on you. Because he/she clearly isn't interested in fixing things.
Cheating on a spouse can have wide-ranging ramifications. Don't miss 10 scandalous love affairs that changed history forever.
Cheating on a spouse can have wide-ranging ramifications. Don't miss 10 scandalous love affairs that changed history forever.
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