Real Housewife Vacations that Ended in Total Disaster

Whistler, BC: Typically, a Housewives trip involves a sunny destination (the right backdrop for bikini selfies and tequila-soaked crying fits). In a geographic twist, the RHOC ladies traded SoCal sunshine for the crisp mountain air of Whistler, BC. (don’t worry, the cool temps didn’t chill the OG of the OC). Skiing, snowboarding, a snowmobile tour, and sipping cocktails in an ice bar were all on the agenda. Not included in the official itinerary: Vicki screaming at Lauri, “I've never been with multiple partners in my life!” while navigating the mountain terrain.

Italy: The Manzos and Lauritas joined the Giudices for some wonderful food and an immersive cultural experience (aka looking for the Gucci store), along with a lot of schlepping strollers up cobblestone streets and hot bus rides. There were some genuinely heartwarming moments as well, with three generations of the Giudice and Gorga families coming together. It was a little like a Griswold family vacation, but with more platform heels and small children.

Miami: Perhaps Florida is the Bermuda Triangle of The Real Housewives – the hometown franchise flopped, and every trip there seems to end up in total chaos. The Real Housewives of Atlanta put on their best thongs and headed to the 305 for some bum-baring and bonding... but things took an ugly turn when Cynthia’s friend Tammy invited her nephew, former NBA player Glenn Rice Jr., along for a day of drinking and a night of hot tubbing. As the evening wore on, Glenn became weirdly aggressive and was asked to leave by Kenya. Clearly agitated, he charged the girls and knocked his aunt Tammy unconscious. Security!

The Berkshires: “Oh, Heather is that your house or is this the garage?” So, the trip to Heather’s country home didn’t get off to a great start, as Ramona seemed intent on causing mischief, and drawing a little blood. Unfortunately, with a wine glass to Kristen’s face, she achieved both. The trip ended with Ramona boarding a private plane like she was escaping from a tastefully decorated and hospitable summer camp.

Morocco: Clearly, a few of the ladies watched Sex and the City 2 a few too many times, because traipsing around Morocco suddenly seemed like a wonderful idea. Between the caftans and the belly dancing, the group squeezed in tons of time for petty bickering and Pinot-induced crying jags. This was the “fanny pack” trip – some women acted like snobby and entitled tourists the entire time, which made the others try to blend into the background out of embarrassment. Carrie, Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte they certainly ain’t.

The Hamptons: There’s nothing like a franchise crossover, and where better to rub elbows than the socialite capital of the East Coast. While the RHOBH ladies visited the Hamptons to toast Lisa Vanderpump’s magazine cover, Kyle also arranged a dinner party with her dear old friend Bethenny – Lisa R. got a stomach bug, Eileen was grilled on the possibly scandalous origins of her second marriage, and Bethenny bashed Erika Girardi’s alter ego. Double the housewives, double the trouble.

Boca Raton: On RHONJ when Dina, twins Teresa and Nicole, Melissa and Amber (plus a couple of husbands, and minus the Giudices) embarked to Florida, they brought a lot of Jersey drama with them. It didn’t get physical with table flipping or hair pulling, but a verbal A-bomb was dropped when Amber’s husband Jim Marchese repeated a rumour that Teresa Aprea’s husband, Rino, had slept with his mother-in-law. As in his wife’s mom! We know the Jersey cast is tight, but this took the “family is everything” storyline a little too far. The fallout made Jim the most hated husband in Housewives history (even Andy – the Switzerland of screaming matches – seems to despise him).

Bali: The RHOC ladies took in the spiritual temples and natural beauty of Bali before eventually descending into a screaming fit that ended with Tamra whipping off her heels and running out of the restaurant while shouting, “You will never see my face again!” But the fish pedicure looked cool.

Amsterdam: The setting may be different (windmills and cannabis cafes) but the 90210 drama remained the same: Lisa Rinna spent the entire trip questioning Kim Richards’s sobriety, while Brandi Glanville further ostracized herself from the group with an ill-timed conversation about drug usage with Kyle and a just-kidding-except-I-really-hate-you slap to Lisa Vanderpump’s pouty face. The lowlight (or highlight, depending on how you look at it) was a dinner party that ended with a smashed wine glass and the trending topic #whatdidharrydo.

Lake George, New York: It’s no surprise that this trip ended in fisticuffs – the Gorgas and Giudices were entrenched in sibling civil war for the entire season. On one side, there was Teresa and Juicy Joe, and on the other, Melissa and regular Joe. The four of them fought bitterly over the course of the show – including a baptism brawl and a screaming match at a fashion show. Tempers came to a head when the group was – irony alert! – on a counseling retreat to try to heal the siblings’ relationship. There were two bright spots that came out of this debacle: Rosie solidified her spot as Jersey's voice of reason, and a mysterious black powder brought some much needed laughs to the group. (Spoiler alert: it was Joe Gorga’s spray-in-a-can hair.)

Ireland: Kelly Dodd was already on the outs with the RHOC women while going into this trip, and things really exploded as they were on their way back home. When camera's stopped rolling, the ladies decided to sneak out – and that's when all Hell broke loose. The ladies got into a drunken text war with Kelly that continued in person on the bus back to the airport. The entire fight was filmed on cellphone cameras because no one was expecting things to pop off with just hours left in Ireland.

St. John, U.S. Virgin Islands (aka Scary Island): Hands down the most infamous of all the Real Housewives trips, the RHONY women jetted to gorgeous St. John’s and promptly descended into a jellybean hell. Kelly Bensimon had a literal breakdown at dinner and maniacally repeated wild accusations ("Bethenny is made of knives," "Alex is the devil"), then she started popping candy like it was, well, candy (most viewers were probably wishing it was Xanax). The outburst was so intense, the group was scared silent – definitely a Housewives first.