People joke all the time about soon-to-be-married women gone mad and turning into absolute Bridezillas that no one wants to be around. You may even have had a chuckle or two about someone you know turning into an unstable and frantic control freak. Understandably, every bride wants her day to be perfect, but sometimes, in the quest of trying to accomplish “perfection” (by the way: unattainable), nerves and stress can get the best of anyone. Next thing you know, people are whispering, “Watch out, Bridezilla coming our way!” And they’re talking about you! Clearly, there is no fun in being a stress-ball and robbing yourself of what should be a wonderful experience. So, how does a prospective bride stay calm and cool and enjoy her day? Here are some tips on keeping your inner Bridezilla at bay.

Stay Focused
Almost inevitably, brides start to drive themselves crazy over little things that really aren’t that important: the wording on their invitations; who is sitting where; etc. Fights start, tears fall and sleep is lost. Keep your focus and remember that these are small details and not the reason you are getting married. You are planning a wedding because of the love between you and your future husband, not because you want to be a wedding planner. These little details will never be remembered later, down the road — so let them go, now.

Be Prepared
Be organized and plan ahead. Create a checklist of every task that needs to be accomplished. This checklist will help make sure you don’t forget anything; it also gives everyone involved in the planning a concise overview of what needs to be done and when. Use this master list to plan what you need to tackle first, then work your way through to completing everything.

You may be a great multitasker. You may also be a perfectionist, wanting things done your way or no way. But you are still only human and there are only so many hours in one day. So: let others help you. You do have a fiancé, family (two, technically) and, of course, wedding party — they are all there to help. Sure, there are tasks you can’t and don’t want to leave to others (ex. choosing the menu or the band), but menial duties (ex. folding programs and wrapping favours) can be given to almost anyone. Free yourself up! Allow yourself to focus on the more important tasks that truly require you.

Stop Worrying About Impressing Your Guests
When you find that you are spending way too much time and getting too many grey hairs over little details such as the design on a plate, stop for a minute, take a deep breath and ask yourself if your guests are really going to notice. Don’t ever worry about impressing your guests. Why? Because these things that are causing havoc in your life, for the sole purpose of impressing them, will not even register.

Take a Break
The task of planning a wedding can be overwhelming, even to the most easy-going of brides. So do remember that you still have lives outside of the wedding planning. Try to spend a weekend (or two, or three) being wedding planning–free, just focussing on each other and how much you love being together.

My last word is to enjoy this special time in your life and, before you freak out, ask yourself if it is really worth it and if it will actually make a difference down the road. You’ll quickly realize that it won’t, and you’ll feel better for the self-awareness. Happy wedding planning! Seriously — happy!!

Rita WongRita Wong is a wedding and events planner and owner of Rita Wong Events. Based in Montreal, she also plans many weddings every year for brides living in Toronto and abroad. She is a dedicated follower of new trends and her goal is to give each bride a wedding that is fresh, unique, and a personal reflection of who they are.