The Cleanse - Part 1
Part 1 of 3: Can Nicolle go two weeks without chocolate?
The problem: My unhealthy eating habits.
Hypothesis: If my roommate and I do a cleanse, we’ll be healthier and understand what we’re putting in our bodies.
Variables: We have to cut out the following: dairy (except organic yogurt and goat yogurt), salt (except sea salt), sugar, white flour, white rice, fat, chocolate, yeast, additives and preservatives, oil (except extra-virgin olive oil), and caffeine (except green tea). We found this list on about.com and decided if there was anything we wanted to change, we could do so. The about.com list says to avoid gluten, but we were allowed to eat organic whole wheat bread that didn’t contain salt or oil. We have two teaspoons of psyllium fibre twice a day to aid… uh… digestion.
Day One: Goat yogurt is absolutely disgusting
Day one! Cleanse! It’s going to be awesome. And 12 days, that’s like, nothing. I can surely give up chocolate and the like for a measly 12 days. It’s like Survivor!
For breakfast, I have goat yogurt with granola mixed in. It tastes like sour milk. I don’t know what my roommate is yapping about when she’s talking about how delicious it is. Perhaps the cleanse is already making her go mad. Drinking psyllium fibre in water is disgusting. We’ve decided we only need one teaspoon a day instead of two, as it says on the package.
For lunch, I had organic vegetable soup and a yummy bagel, which contained no white flour. My roommate made us some delicious salmon and rice with veggies for dinner. Not too shabby. Pistachio nuts are good for snacking.
Day Two: The cleanse excuses me from being social
You can’t be very social when you can’t eat or drink anything at any establishment other than your own home or some health food store. I went out last night and everyone was ingesting beer and fried foods. I hadn’t really eaten much all day, so I had to go home. I prepared myself some of my signature dish (grape tomatoes and avocado with extra virgin olive oil, balsamic vinegar, and fresh black pepper) and had some strawberries for dessert.
For breakfast, I bought some regular organic yogurt (thank God I don’t have to eat goat yogurt) and a banana. For lunch, I had some vegetarian chilli that my roomie thoughtfully prepared. I snacked on flatbread with almond butter. Pretty good.
Ugh, what’s with the headache?
Day Three: I HATE THE CLEANSE
Uh, chocolate? Where art thou? I wrote on the whiteboard in the office, “Days until chocolate: 9.” But that’s no help. I’m irritable and I can’t concentrate on anything. I have no idea if this is a result of the sudden elimination of caffeine or sugar. Either way, it SUCKS. I have a headache! I’d give up my firstborn to get a cup of joe with some sugar and cream. I miss sugar and cream and coffee. Oh, sweet, java, please come back to me. Just a taste…
Drinking all this water and annoying herbal tea means I have to go to the bathroom a lot. I think my boss, who sits near the bathroom, thinks I have a cocaine habit or something. I don’t, boss lady. I’m on a cleanse, dammit. That begs the question, is cocaine allowed on the cleanse?
Also, I’m really hot. I’m usually always cold. Coincidence?
After work, I went to a work event. There were appetizers and free drinks. Alas, I had water while I watched everyone else indulge. For dinner, I made a huge pot of whole wheat pasta with a sauce that consisted of no-salt organic canned tomatoes, red and green peppers, spinach, onions, garlic and spices. It was good!
Day Four: A little better
Well, today I had a delicious breakfast of strawberries, bananas, and organic yogurt. It’s actually so good, I’d eat it normally. I’m not irritable like yesterday and the headache has all but faded, but I’m still unable to concentrate. I’m not having hot flashes anymore, thank God. Now I know what my mom is talking about.
For lunch I had some organic soup, an organic bagel (whole wheat) and some flatbread with almond butter. I tried some gross juice that I’m allowed to drink, but it was so gross that I went back to the water. For some reason, after lunch, I felt really heavy, bloated, and sluggish.
I don’t have any motivation to go to the gym. I feel lackadaisical. I had an organic corn-fed chicken breast for dinner, which I can season with herbs. I went on a date. I ordered… green tea. My date ordered nachos. *cough* Bastard. *cough*
Day Five: Not so bad, unless you count the chocolate-tasting contest
I work next to our foodtv.com blogger, Catherine Jheon. Today she’s having a chocolate-tasting party directly in front of my desk. *cough* Hate her *cough*. Breakfast is actually good, with my strawberry-and-banana mix happening. For lunch, I had the same old pasta I made. It’s still tasty and I’m not really having cravings anymore.
After work, I went to a film screening where I ordered… green tea. Yum. After the films, everyone wanted to go drinking at a nearby bar, but the roomie and I just walked home and snacked on some fruit. Not drinking interferes with my social life.
Check out Part Two of Nicolle's Guinea Pig