Isn't It Dee-lightful: My Worst Gifts Ever
Anyone who believes that men are equal to women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present. - Anonymous
The holidays are all about the joy of giving, being kind and having good will towards others. However, there is something to be said about the joy of receiving. We aren't supposed to talk about it, because it can make us sound selfish, but I have to say, I enjoy getting a nice gift from that special someone. That special someone who took the time and cared enough to brave the crazy Christmas mall crowds.
Seriously, I want to know the marketing genius that convinced men that a car emergency kit makes a great gift for your special lady. Yes, they're handy, practical and necessary. Yes, it shows you care for my safety, but come on, so does mace.
I also don’t recall ever mentioning that I was longing for the DVD collector's edition of the first five seasons of American Idol, how thoughtful.
Unfortunately it only gets worse before it gets better. When you become a mother, the gifts become about “making your life easier.” Doesn’t that sound romantic? Nothing says "I want you now” like a new floor steamer. How hot and bothered would you be after opening your new Dustbuster? My worst gift ever: a four-piece, powder blue, quilted, Winnie The Pooh diaper bag set. I was speechless.
I know it’s the thought that counts, but seriously, just think about how nice it would be if my special someone bought a gift for me, not for the house or the car. The me that you couldn’t keep your hands off of for more than a few hours not that long ago. The me that you tried to talk into doing “it” in the back of that cab in New York City. The me that did that thing to you, that one time, with the thing, remember? Yes? That me!
My solution is to go out and treat yourself. It doesn't have to be expensive, just something that is a little personal. So go out and get your hair done or your nails all polished up. Be sure to let your special someone know that they're picking up the tab.
So, let’s hear it, tell me about your worst gift ever, I know you have one.
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Dee Brun is the award-winning author of Libations of Life: A Girl’s Guide to Life One Cocktail at a Time, a cocktail chef and stylist, TV personality, home entertaining guru, writer, humorist, wife, mother of 4, TV Junkie, shoe-aholic, and borderline George Clooney stalker. Read her column, Isn’t it Deelightful, every Friday on Slice.ca.