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How long is enough?

How long do you give a relationship before you decide it's not working? Have you ever ended a relationship prematurely or have you been too slow to pull the trigger?

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I spent many years with my ex even after realizing it was over before I even gave birth to our baby girl. I agreed to marry him, I felt trapped once I had a baby with him. My beliefs were that you have a baby with someone the right thing to do is marry them. So I married him a couple years after his proposal. We had been together for over 4years at this point and even as I said my vows in my mind I was saying "I am making the biggest mistake of my life!" we stayed together for two more years after that then I couldn't take his yelling at me to get the f-ck out. So one day I did as he said, he begged me to stay and for a while it was hard after I did leave, even considered going back. I wish I left when I wanted to 1 1/2 years into the relationship. I ended up staying with him for 7years! 5 1/2 years wasted with someone I didn't really want to be with for my daughters sake. I would say, it could be a week for some, a year, or even 30-years but when you know it is time to go just do it!!!

Pookie
Friday, 10 July 2009 19:52 PM EST

stay til you wanna break up! if you wanna break up, do it asap. saves everyone recovery time.

Robotic Hottie
Monday, 13 July 2009 11:21 AM EST

I would give a week just to make sure you don't make the wrong decision.

Mama Mia
Monday, 20 July 2009 19:17 PM EST

You can't put a time limit on it. I stayed with someone for 4 years. I stayed because I thought he needed me, even though being with him was killing me. I look bad and realize I didn't help either of us and breaking up has been great for both of us.

So leave when you're ready. I was ready when I found out about his 2 other girlfriends.

Melanie
Wednesday, 29 July 2009 13:43 PM EST

breakup with him if things arent going well. the longer you wait, the worse it will get. but be sure of your decision, because you dont want to regret breaking up AFTER you do it.

annonymous
Saturday, 08 August 2009 16:31 PM EST

breakup with him if things arent going well. the longer you wait, the worse it will get. but be sure of your decision, because you dont want to regret breaking up AFTER you do it.

annonymous
Saturday, 08 August 2009 16:31 PM EST

Stay long enough to find how how much $$ he has..if he had none..or is cheap...RUN as far and as fast as you can.

Sue
Tuesday, 01 September 2009 15:10 PM EST

One month.

clare.
Wednesday, 16 September 2009 14:37 PM EST

I have a friend who stayed with a guy for close to 6 months knowing full well she was not a fan of his weight. She broke it off with him about 3 months in. Needless to say he was not thrilled, he begged for her to come back, so what does she do? she took him back. He still was not the man she needed in her life however she tried to fool herself into thinking he was, most likely so she could say she had a boyfriend. I personally don't feel it's worth it...turns out anyway that he dumped her!!! If you feel about the right amount of time for you that it will not work out with this person...listen to yourself.

butterfly
Friday, 02 October 2009 22:15 PM EST

hey! if you like him keep him if you hate him don't lie throw him out the window! u know what they say there are lots of fish in the sea!

katherine/alexandra
Sunday, 11 October 2009 18:28 PM EST

I agree with many of the statements made before me as well, there is no exact time limit per se. It's time to go whenever you realize that it isn't going to work. I've had that situation that after 2 months with a guy I realized I'm just not into him and there's no reason to postpone something that would only end up hurting more if I did. On the contrare I dated another guy for almost a year because I thought things were going somewhere, but the day you come to the realization that it isn't is the day you need to let them know and get out of the relationship.

Katelyn3
Friday, 13 November 2009 22:25 PM EST

If a man is kind I give him at least a few dates to see who he really is when he comes out of his shell. Many of the good men are shy at first. After about 6 dates if I'm at all bored....I can't try anymore. I knew my current boyfriend was amazing and perfect for me on our first date.

Maggie May3
Thursday, 18 February 2010 17:47 PM EST

End it if you're not in love anymore. You're not doing him any favours by staying in the relationship and being dishonest about your feelings. Sometimes it takes a long time to realize you're not in love anymore, and even more time to have the courage to get out.

JMac3
Sunday, 25 April 2010 17:31 PM EST

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