Do you think couples should share and share alike when it comes to finances or should they keep everything separate? What do you do?
Of course it is! Lots of what a couple needs when they first start out is money! They just finished paying for a wedding, they are just starting out in life together. It isn't cheap. Material gifts are nice, but money can be used more wisely. It can be put towards what is more so needed.
I think it is best for couples to maintain individual accounts and also have a joint accountant. The joint account can be used to pay for things like rent and groceries and the seperate accounts can be used for individual bills and needs. I know as a couple you are supposed to work together as a team but I also think it's good to have some seperation of funds. In the long run it will cause fewer problems than just having one big joint account.
my husband and i have been together for 20 years (we're both 40) and we always shared everything... but we also both earned practically nothing when we first started living together. I think it is much harder to do if the income scales are out of whack...
My husband and I have been married for almost a year and we share a joint account. That account we use for things like groceries. We each have our own chequeing accounts where our paycheques go. HOWEVER, he makes far more than I could ever hope to. His account pays the mortgage and the bills. He's also the spender in this relationship. If I was the spender with how little I make it could cause a problem. Since it's him and he is aware of it, it just works for us.
My husband and I have been together for 3 years. We only have seperate accounts, no joint ones. We both pay approximately half the bills and we both make the same amount. There is no need to share an account for us because we give eachother cash if we need to transfer funds. That way we can both spend money for presents and whatnot for eachother without the other knowing how much the gift was.
my fiance and I have separate chequing accounts and no joint accounts, but we share everything. We've been through some tough financial times together when we were both broke, so it's made us stronger and taught us how to manage money better. We're about to graduate and realistically he's going to be earning a lot more than me, and similar to Wag, he's the big spender so that's fine lol. We make all our financial decisions together, and there have been times when one of us would extend ourselves finacially to help the other, but ultimately there is a balance to what we do, and we don't keep count of favours, not when our livelihoods are caught up in each other and we want to spend the rest of our lives together.... he likes to spoil me when he can, and I like to spoil him when I can... it's always sort of proportionate to what we have available..
My situation is similar to Wags. Me and my husband (we've been married for almost 2 1/2yrs) still have seperate accounts that we've had since before we were married. We also added him to one of my accounts since we recieved cheques made out to both of us at our wedding. My husband also makes a lot more than I do, so the big expenses come out of his account. Mortgage, insurance, ect. My account pays for things like groceries and bills. If I'm short, or vice versa, we ask the other person to help pay for something. More often then not (since I make less), if I don't have enough between paycheques for groceries, I ask him for help. Thats what we do, we help each other out. I helped him out before we were married when he was strapped for cash. When your constantly trying to balance and make sure that you each spend the exact same, it's like your losing something in the relationship. It becomes too much of an issue. Granted, money will always be an issue unless we win the lottery (fingers crossed), but we try not to measure how much each contributes to the relationship
IN MY FIRST MARRIAGE WE SHARED AND COMBINED EVERYTHING, IT WORKED AS WE BOTH HAD THE SAME TYPE OF SAVING HABITS. IN MY SECOND MARRIAGE WE HAD A PRENUP (NOT ALWAYS WORTH THE PAPER ITS WRITTEN ON) IT WORKED WELL AS I GAVE MY WORD AND LIVEDTO IT AND RESPECTED HIS WISHWS AND DIDN'T HIRE AN ATTY TO GET SOMETHING AS WE HAD AN AGREEMENT I AM SEEING A NEW PERSON MY INCOME IS BETTER THAN TWICE WHAT HIS IS I HAVE TOLD HIM IF WE BECOME A COUPLE I WILL BRING TO THE TABLE WHAT HE DOES AND THE REST GOES TO MY KIDS BECAUSE IT WAS THEIR FATHER WHO MADE SURE I HAD WHAT I NEEDED. I WOULD LIKE A JOINT ACCOUNT THAT WE EACH BRING LETS SAY $300.00 TO WE WOULD BOTH PAY OUR OWN BILLS FOR OUR HOUSES AND UPKEEP, INSURANCE, REPAIRS DOES THIS SOULD FAIR??? I WOULD LIKE MY CHILDREN TO HAVE WHAT IS RIGHTLY THEIRS AND HIS TO HAVE WHAT BELONGED TO HE AND IS DECEASED WIFE WHATDO YOU THINK
IN MY FIRST MARRIAGE WE SHARED AND COMBINED EVERYTHING, IT WORKED AS WE BOTH HAD THE SAME TYPE OF SAVING HABITS. IN MY SECOND MARRIAGE WE HAD A PRENUP (NOT ALWAYS WORTH THE PAPER ITS WRITTEN ON) IT WORKED WELL AS I GAVE MY WORD AND LIVED TO IT AND RESPECTED HIS WISHS AND DIDN'T HIRE AN ATTY TO GET SOMETHING AS WE HAD AN AGREEMENT I AM SEEING A NEW PERSON MY INCOME IS BETTER THAN TWICE WHAT HIS IS I HAVE TOLD HIM IF WE BECOME A COUPLE I WILL BRING TO THE TABLE WHAT HE DOES AND THE REST GOES TO MY KIDS BECAUSE IT WAS THEIR FATHER WHO MADE SURE I HAD WHAT I NEEDED. I WOULD LIKE A JOINT ACCOUNT THAT WE EACH BRING LETS SAY $300.00 A MONTH TO WE WOULD BOTH PAY OUR OWN BILLS FOR OUR HOUSES AND UPKEEP, INSURANCE, REPAIRS DOES THIS SOUND FAIR??? I WOULD LIKE MY CHILDREN TO HAVE WHAT IS RIGHTLY THEIRS AND HIS TO HAVE WHAT BELONGED TO HE AND IS DECEASED WIFE WHATDO YOU THINK
In various circumstances people either understand or snub their nose at you with either decision, thinking that their way is the best way. However, people must realize that every couple is unique so should their financial responsibility in their relationships. At no point would I ever want to buy my wife a B-Day present and have only discover what it is, simply by checking our account, where is the romance in that. In our situation, she makes a little more than I and definitely has more financial savings. I would never dream of asking her to pay off my debts because she has more money because they are simply not her debts. We do however have a joint account where 80% of our paychecks go into and the rest goes into our own accounts. This way I feel that things are fair, organized and thoughtful. But that is our way!
Everything balances out in the long run so why bother stressing over receipts and expenses?! If the couple is seriously expecting to grow old together, shouldn't they do everything they can to succeed together without a second thought to nickels and dimes? Or should I say hundreds and thousands!(And for the pestimistics, if it doesn't work out you'll be starting from scratch anyway.)
Well.. Me and my man we pay separatlyHe pays electricitry, cable, internet, I pay groceries, phone, cellphones and part of the house and my debts. I take care of all the paper work.I have to say we arrive pretty tight at the end of the months so we decided to cut cellphones but try to argue with them not to pay 430$ to cancel your agrrement of 3 years. not easy. so we just don`t use them anymore.
I have only been married for 3 months now and I have two kids and he has two kids. My husband makes way more than I do with oppurtunuty for overtime and side jobs. I am a secretary and make okay money but not as much as he does. We are constantly argueing, becuase he feels I should pay half of everything, I would't mind this if I had it to offer. By the time I pay my daughter' tuiton, our car insurace, and medical insurance for all of us that comes out of my check. I really don't have much to offer. Mind you i do all of the house work, maintain all four kids 90% of the time and cloth all of them with the money i make. I am the one who pays for our Friday Pizza nights which is twice a month and any extra's that all four kids want to do. He pays strickly bills and does fantacy football goes on a weekend sking with some friends, goes to Steeler games and then when he comes short snaps my head off because he has spent all of his money. Any advice because i am at the end of my rope, I know that I am not the best at maintaining my money, but if he expects me to pay half down the line I am never going to get ahead.
my bf and i split the important bills like tv, hydro, rent and groceries. We pay our own cell phones and things that we want for ourselves.
When it comes to money my fiance and I have our own accounts, not because of lack of trust just we both like our own banks and all our bills etc are already set up and joining together into an account add hassel neither of us wants to do. However we have a joint savings acount one we both have access too and one we both can save into, we have a joint budget he pays for more as he makes more at the moment all my money goes to personal debts where his money goes to the house and his debts.we both know what the other owes and how much we each make, we discuss our finacial situation openly and have projected what we can each save each month and have it on a work sheet. Every month we are to pay into the savings acount (saving for wedding is our goal) the rest pays bills and we are on a monthly spending alowance for personal use say $20 a week. It works well we have found we are richer than we thought and has taken alot of stress off our finacial payments. honestly youll be surprised at how much you spend over a year on random stuff like coffee, snacks, pens, cute notebooks, movies, things you could possibly not even know where it went all you know is you spent it. Joint accounts or not i believe most people at least have a joined house acount if they share the bill equally, make your savings account a bill and you wont be tempted to spend it.
I make way less money than my live in boyfriend. I'm a full time student, and he works full time. I pay in as much as I can from my part time job and other sources of income and he takes care of our finances. If I want to spend money on my hair or nails he looks it over and fits it into our budget. It actually works out well, because I'm horrible at managing money, this way we have the necessities, and a little extra treat here and there.
Me and husband share everything. He always says it to me "there is no difference who's is what, we are a team and are in it together. My money is your money and vice versa."Its true. But then, we grew up in a family where our parents shared money and there was no question as to why our mother or father withdrew money from a joint account. We do not believe in pre-nuptials. We do have separate accounts as well as a joint. We think its great this way. We both know having separate accounts does not affect sharing money. He has my banking info and pin and I have his. All we do is communicate about where our money goes, that way we can track spending and expenses.
I have been married for two years now, and we were together for 7 yrs before marriage. My husband expects me to pay half of all the bills that we have to pay in the house, even though I make exactly half of what he does... This is a BIG problem and a constant fight because he takes hiself out to eat every weekend and leaves me at home because I don't have the extra money to pay for "my half"! Things like that are very hurtful and I am at my witts end in not knowing what to do. We have had counceling before and the councelor told him that the bills should be paid by percentages, in other words, since he makes more he should pay more on the bills, but he will not hear of it, he says he is being "punished" for making more money than me. He pays the whole cable bill and throws it in my face all of the time. I have seen a few comments here that are similar, but not quite as bad as my sitiuation. He thinks I should go out and get an 11 to 7 job (graveyard shift) in addition to my full time day job. This is soooo extreme to me. can ANYBODY tell me if they have ever experineced or heard of such selfishness before? I'm in need of help. Thanks...
I'm so terrible with my finances. I hope the women I marry will be smarter with cash than I am. I know of an accountant in Vancouver that helps people balance their expenditures with their gross income. I should speak to him about that.
Don't just sit there talking to your computer. Have your say and add a comment. Please note: All comments are subject to moderation before being posted into the comments section.
Apply to be on your favourite Slice show!
Big Brother Canada
Watch Season One Now!
Fridays at 9pm ET