Playlists

Best of New Holiday Music

Scotch Mommy — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 14:17:00 GMT

Forget the tired, old classics by Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra. Santa’s got a shiny new playlist for rocking around the Christmas tree.

Christmas – Michael Bublé
Care to share the holidays with Michael Bublé? The Canadian crooner’s celebrating the birth of his new album. Featuring original songs and traditional favourites, “Christmas” arrives with Bublé’s signature suave style. And jolly ol’ Michael is lurking under the mistletoe, sharing the seasonal vibe with some famous friends, too. Shania Twain and the Puppini Sisters lend their vocals to an album that’s destined to become a holiday must-have.

A Very She and Him Christmas – She & Him
When she’s not starring on TV or in Hollywood blockbusters like 500 Days of Summer, Zooey Deschanel is busy getting her musical groove on. Her band, She & Him, are gift-wrapping their own unique brand of festive cheer this year. Low-key and fresh, this new musical collection will put the happy back into your holidays. Listen out for “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” the track Zooey nailed in Elf.

A Christmas Cornucopia – Annie Lennox
Is there anything Annie Lennox can’t do? Eurythmics vocalist, Oscar® winner, solo artist, and now holiday chanteuse. Annie’s song selection sets her apart from the usual December fare. Popular tunes such as “Silent Night” mix perfectly with less-familiar tracks such as “In the Bleak Midwinter” and “See Amid the Winter’s Snow.” Pour yourself some eggnog, toss another log on the fire, and cozy up to this enchanting treasury of tunes.

Christmas Thanks for Nothing – Slow Club
Bah, humbug! If you’re tired of decking the halls and elbowing your way through holiday shoppers, sit back and lose yourself in this playlist. It’s a collection of only five songs but they pack plenty of seasonal bite. Think of it as an appetizer of tunes for when you’re feeling more naughty than nice. Indulge your inner Scrooge with “It’s Christmas and You’re Boring Me” and “All Alone at Christmas.”

Wintersong – Sarah McLachlan
Not everyone finds the holidays a time of abundant cheer. Sarah’s understated seasonal suite will offer comfort. Beautifully performed, this album is the perfect antidote to the sickly sweet tunes found elsewhere. Her pretty rendition of “Christmas Time is Here”—the song made famous by the Charlie Brown Christmas Special—features fellow Canadian Diana Krall.

A Glimpse of Stocking – Saint Etienne
Cheeky and addictive, this original holiday album from last winter is the musical equivalent of candy canes and tinsel. It’s over-the-top festive fun. Retro-pop, acid house thumpers, and soulful ballads all get the Saint Etienne treatment. Feeling Grinchy? Let the London band shoo away your seasonal case of the grumps. “No Cure for the Common Christmas,” “Gonna Have a Party,” and “Unwrap Me” will make your spirit bright.

Christmas with the Puppini Sisters – The Puppini Sisters
If you enjoy the jazzy harmonies that the Puppini Sisters bring to Michael Bublé’s album, check out their own aural glad tidings. Released in 2010, this energetic trio brings a nostalgic feel to the holiday table. It’s the perfect soundtrack for an old-school cocktail party. Suddenly you’ll be craving vintage nibbles: Chex Mix, devilled eggs, Ritz crackers, and the ubiquitous cheese ball. Add a few martinis and you’ll be all set.

Christmas Special – The Boy Least Likely To
The holidays are jolly, annoying, hilarious, and heartbreaking—this album understands this rollercoaster month better than most. Twinkly and twee, The Boy Least Likely To has a love/hate relationship with the gingerbread season. Songs like “Jingle My Bells” and “Blue Spruce Needles” tell the tale in all its messy glory. Best of all, the UK duo have crafted a Christmas cracker of a tune called “George and Andrew” about—you guessed it!—the singers of seasonal fave, “Last Christmas” by Wham!

Under the Mistletoe – Justin Bieber
Over-achiever Justin Bieber jumps on the holiday album bandwagon and he’s inviting some famous elves along for the ride. Usher, Busta Rhymes, Boyz II Men, and the Band Perry are helping the Biebs serve up some Yuletide treats. Justin’s stocking is full of original tracks and sing-a-long classics, including a duet with the diva of Festivus herself, Mariah Carey. Together they perform her worldwide hit, “All I Want for Christmas Is You.”

Written by: Jackie Middleton

For more, please check out Jackie’s blog at http://www.losethatgirl.com.

Bethenny Getting Married? A Playlist Inspired by Bethenny Frankel

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 17:00:00 GMT

It’s time to don your most sexy party dress and invite that hot guy from the office because Bethenny is getting married! Ah, you gotta love a Manhattan wedding! But before we send our favourite TV BFF down the aisle, let’s toast the bride, and yummy mummy. To celebrate the start of her exciting new series AND life as a wife, and mother, here’s a playlist inspired by the woman of the hour, Bethenny Frankel!

Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) – Beyoncé
During the Real Housewives of New York, Bethenny’s relationship with Jason had more ups and downs than a fairground rollercoaster. Seriously, how patient and understanding could a girl be? Beyonce’s anthem to frustrated single gals everywhere takes that exasperation and turns it into something a little more flirty and danceable.

Best lyric: If you liked it you should have put a ring on it.

Marry You – Bruno Mars
Whew! Thank goodness Jason finally got on the same relationship page as our Bethenny! It’s always advisable not to cross a woman with a kitchen full of sharp knives! Bruno Mars offers a contemporary ditty on getting wed, hopefully for all the right reasons.

Best lyric: Cause it’s a beautiful night; we’re looking for something dumb to do. Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you.

Skinny Girl – Cordovan
Bethenny created the party gal’s ultimate guilt-free beverage: the Skinnygirl Margarita. This fully mixed, bottled elixir of tequila, lime juice, and citrus liqueur boasts only 100 calories. Yes, heaven does exist. Cordovan’s electronic tune features no lyrics, which is probably a good thing because we won’t be able to sing a single word after downing a few of these babies.

Best lyric: none - instrumental

Modern Love – David Bowie
Only a few years ago, getting hitched at the apex of your pregnancy was frowned upon. Hand it to Bethenny to shun convention and go all modern on us.

Best lyric: Modern love gets me to the church on time.

She’s Having a Baby – Dave Wakeling
Survey time! Who thinks this ‘80s tune from the singer of The Beat, and General Public should be the theme song for Bethenny’s new show? Says it all, really!

Best lyric: Mixed drinks and mixed emotions. Here at the start of a brand new life. All change, she’s having a baby as lovers turn to husband and wife.

Red Dress - Sugababes
During the 2010 Red Dress Collection at New York Fashion Week, hot mama Bethenny stalked the catwalk with her baby bump wrapped in a stunning Isabella Oliver creation. Taking the time to promote heart disease awareness in women, Bethenny proved she’s not only stylish but socially conscious as well. You go, girl!

Best lyric: Cooler than the red dress, ‘cos I’m cooler, ‘cos I’m cooler.

Empire State of Mind (Part II – Broken Down) – Alicia Keys
Bethenny is the quintessential New York woman. Born and bred in the shadows of Manhattan’s iconic skyscrapers, she’s proof that you can achieve your dreams—and then some—in the city that never sleeps.

Best lyric: Concrete jungle where dreams are made of. There’s nothing you can’t do. Now you’re in New York!

Apron Strings – Everything But the Girl
We’ve seen Bethenny mother her Lhasa pup, Cookie, through three seasons of Real Housewives. Now with her long-awaited baby on board, we’ll get to see the full motherload: lullabies, diapers and sleepless nights. Aw, bless!

Best lyric: Apron strings, cold and lonely for time brings, thoughts that only will be quiet when someone clings to my apron strings. And I’ll be perfect in my way. When you cry I will be there. I’ll sing to you and comb your hair. All your troubles I will share.

I Love New York – Madonna
Bethenny adores her hometown and it appears that this love is reciprocated. Not only did her Naturally Thin book top the New York Times Best Seller list, but she also graced Times Square in a huge billboard for PETA. Talk about taking over a city and making it yours!

Best lyric: Other cities always make me mad; other cities always make me sad. No other city ever made me glad. Except New York, I love New York.

“C” is for Cookie – Cookie Monster
Sure, Bethenny has a new baby to dote on, but we faithful fans of Ms. Frankel cannot forget her original munchkin, Cookie, the Lhasa mix. It’s kinda fitting that this chef’s fur-baby is named after a perennial culinary favourite.

Best lyric: C is for cookie, that’s good enough for me!

Recipe for Love – Harry Connick Jr.
Take one famous chef, add one long-awaited marriage, mix in a birth and you’ve definitely got the recipe for love—or at the very least, one sweet reality show!

Best lyric: It doesn’t need sugar ‘cause it’s already sweet. It doesn’t need an oven ‘cause it’s got a lot of heat. Just add a dash of kisses to make it all complete. And that’s the recipe for making love.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Watch Bethenny Getting Married? on Slice Saturdays premiering January 8 at 7pm ET/8pm PT. Get more deets at Saturdays on Slice.

Millionaire Matchmaker: A Playlist Inspired By Patti Stanger

Guest Blogger — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 14:00:00 GMT

Take away the platinum Amex cards, and the vacation homes in far flung locales, and you’ll find that most millionaires are just like me and you. Sure, they don’t have to work if they don’t want to, and paying monthly bills isn’t a financial juggling act, but they do stress about finding love and keeping it. In honour of the wealthy singletons waiting for their Millionaire Matchmaker love connection, there’s a play list rich in stellar tunes that won’t break the bank.

Millionaire – Kelis (featuring Andre 3000)

Aw, it’s so tough being a millionaire. You don’t have to work. You worry that people only like you for your cash – it’s just so…isolating. In this energetic tune, Kelis and Andre 3000 whine about an abundance of riches, and the problems they bring. Here, let me dry your tears with a thousand dollar bill.

Best lyric: Mama I’m a millionaire, but I feel like a bum. Mama I’m a millionaire, but I feel like the only one.

Love Don’t Cost a Thing – Jennifer Lopez

Shame J-Lo is already happily married. Her lyrics portray the ideal woman for the lonely, love struck millionaire. The thing is, it’s easy for her to sing these words and mean them when she can buy her own diamonds and Krug champagne.

Best lyric: All that matters is that you treat me right. Give me all the things I need that money can't buy, yeah. You think you gotta keep me iced - you don't. You think I'm gonna spend your cash - I won't. Even if you were broke, my love don't cost a thing.

If You Can Afford Me – Katy Perry

Ooh, Katy! Did you throw down this ultimatum with hubby, Russell Brand? The California Gurl sings a tune many gals with aspirations of catching a wealthy man know off by heart. Kinda flings the women’s movement back a few hundred years, but who’s counting!

Best lyric: It takes more than a wink, more than a drink, more than you think. If you want me, you’re gonna have to break the bank tonight.

Matchmaker, Matchmaker – Ella Fitzgerald

Patti Stanger might think she’s a modern woman helping today’s wheelers and dealers find love but truth be told, her profession is one of the world’s oldest. In this spirit, it’s time to spin an old school gem! For your aural pleasure, Ms. Fitzgerald’s silky vocal stylings take on a tune made famous by ‘Fiddler on the Roof’.

Best lyric: Matchmaker, matchmaker make me a match. Find me a find. Catch me a catch. Night after night in the dark I’m alone. So find me a match of my own.

Party at a Rich Dude’s House – Ke$ha

Leave it to Ke$ha to relish a smash and grab boozefest in the wealthy part of town. Perhaps this song should be regarded as a cautionary tale for all millionaires who see this sparkly songstress on the approach. She’ll use you for your house, your pool, your car… and move on to the next gullible target. Best to cross Ke$ha off the list as a possible love match then!

Best lyric: Swimming pool, limousines (c’mon, let’s do it), C’mon let’s cause a scene.

Poor Little Rich Boy – Regina Spektor

Many millionaires shake off the stereotypical playboy image, choosing instead to spend all their waking hours building their empire. While being a workaholic and counting your millions is commendable, it certainly doesn’t keep you warm at night. Regina offers up an ode to the wealthy bloke who just wants to be loved by the right woman.

Best lyric: Poor little rich boy, all the couples have gone. You wish that they hadn’t, you don’t wanna be alone.

How to Be a Millionaire - ABC

Who doesn’t want to get rich quick and join the millionaire’s club? We all do! The never-ending popularity of lottery tickets and casinos proves this point. Eighties pop faves, ABC want to get in on the action too. Guess all those gold and platinum albums didn’t add up to much, eh?

Best lyric: Tell me, tell me how to be a millionaire. Millionaire. Billionaire. Zillionaire.

Material World - Madonna

You have to wonder where Patti finds the eligible women for her millionaire clients. What proud, independent woman would think that a cattle call ‘audition’ for a date with a socially inept rich guy was a good idea? Madonna was obviously onto something back in the mid-80s. Chicks cruising for an easy financial win-fall aren’t new.

Best lyric: They can beg and they can plead but they don’t see the light (that’s right). ‘Cause the boy with the cold hard cash is always Mr. Right.

Can’t Buy Me Love – The Beatles

Money can buy fancy cars, exotic vacations and the ritziest of penthouses but as the Fab Four sing, it cannot purchase true love. Just ask Paul McCartney. After his own marriage fiasco with Heather Mills, he knows better than most!

Best lyric: Say you don't need no diamond ring and I'll be satisfied. Tell me that you want the kind of thing that money just can't buy. I don't care too much for money, money can't buy me love.

Beautiful, Dirty Rich – Lady Gaga

Is it just me or do many of the clients on Millionaire Matchmaker own bloated egos and an entitled aura that sneers, “I’m better than you”? Yeah, I thought so. For the working class, it comes as no surprise that there are different rules for the beautiful and obscenely rich. Even newly minted millionaire, Lady Gaga recognizes this unfair advantage.

Best lyric: We just like to party, like to party yeahhh! Bang, bang! We’re beautiful, and dirty rich.

Jackie Middleton

For more, please check out Jackie’s blog at http://www.losethatgirl.com/

Top 20 Canadian Musicians

Scotch Mommy — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 14:14:00 GMT

In honour of Canada Day, we proudly present our first playlist of the top 20 musical acts Canada has ever produced. Usually our playlists are limited to 10, but with so many great Canadian musicians, how could we possibly choose just 10? To help with the selection, we asked everyone here on the slice.ca team to offer their picks for this oh-so-special honour. Of course, we’re sure we’ve left off someone’s fave, but we had to cut if off somewhere. What we have included are some of the world’s greatest musicians, and some of the world’s soon-to-be greatest. So without further ado, happy Canada Day!

1. Leonard Cohen - “Hallelujah”
Considered by many to be an unparalleled masterpiece of songwriting, this song has also been covered by a slew of artists, from John Cale in the first Shrek film, to Willie Nelson, Bon Jovi, and Canadians Rufus Wainwright, k.d. lang, and Simple Plan.

2. Joni Mitchell - “Big Yellow Taxi”
Covers are still being made of this song about nature’s losing war with civilization. With its references to pesticides and deforestation, it’s just as relevant today.

3. Neil Young - “Heart of Gold”
We’ve clearly started our list off with the big guns. Young has a dizzying number of albums under his belt: six from his years with Buffalo Springfield, six from Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, one from the Stills-Young Band, and an amazing 34 albums on his own. Of those 34, more than half a dozen went platinum or multi-platinum.

4. Oscar Peterson – “You Look Good To Me”
Frequently called Canada’s greatest gift to jazz, over the course of his six-decade career Peterson performed and recorded with musical monoliths Count Basie, Ella Fitzgerald, Louis Armstrong, Dizzy Gillespie, and Duke Ellington.

5. Stompin' Tom Connors – “Sudbury Saturday Night!”
Despite being almost completely unknown outside of Canada, Stompin Tom Connors was voted 13th greatest Canadian, fifth greatest living Canadian, and the top Canadian performing artist by voters in the CBC’s “Greatest Canadian National Survey” in 2004. Far be it from us to leave him off our humble list.

6. Anne Murray – "Snowbird"
For the current crop of Canadian music listeners, she might only be known as someone your mother, or possibly, grandmother listened to. But she’s sold 54 million records, has won more than 30 Grammy, Juno, and American Music awards, and was said to be Elvis Presley’s favourite female vocalist, thank you very much.

7. Sarah McLachlan – “Angel”
Despite being only 42 years old, Sarah McLachlan’s career spans more than two decades and includes album sales over 40 million worldwide. In 1996, she created Lilith Fair, the first and most successful all-female music festival ever.

8. Bryan Adams – “It’s Only Love” (duet with Tina Turner)
Whether you like arena rock or not, there can be no list of the top musicians in Canada that doesn’t include Bryan Adams. With hits such as “Run to You”, “Summer of ‘69”, “Heaven,” and “Cuts Like a Knife,” Adams has also collaborated and written songs for Tina Turner, Roger Daltrey, Neil Diamond, Bonnie Rait, and Joe Cocker.

9. The Barenaked Ladies – “If I Had a Million Dollars”
With a career spanning more than 20 years, BNL started as duo vocalists Ed Robertson and Steve Page playing at college campuses. Their first major release, 1991’s Yellow Tape, sold so fast it became the first independently released tape to go platinum in Canada. Soon they were chart-toppers around the world, with hits such as “The Old Apartment,” “One Week,” and “If I Had a Million Dollars.”

10. The Tragically Hip – “New Orleans Is Sinking”
Quite possibly the most beloved Canadian band, The Hip manage to sell out arena-size concerts in Canada and the States, despite their lack of chart success outside of Canada.

11. Blue Rodeo – “5 Days In May”
From their first hit single, “Try,” from their Outskirts album released in 1987, Blue Rodeo has maintained a presence on the Canadian music scene, selling over three million albums and winning four Juno “Best Group” awards.

12. Maestro Fresh West – “Let Your Backbone Slide”
Wes Williams aka Maestro Fresh Wes paved the way for Canadian rappers with this fresh cut that was the first Canadian hip hop single to reach gold status and premier on Billboard’s Top 20 Rap Singles Chart. “Let Your Backbone Slide” was all the rage of dance floors worldwide in the early 90s and can still be heard sampled in today’s electronic music.

13. Our Lady Peace – “Superman’s Dead”
The band was the soundtrack of many Generation Xers lives during the 90s. They were the quintessential alt-rock troupe with introspective lyrics, pulsing hooks, and Raine Maida's unique vocals (and frontman good looks).

14. Alanis Morisette – "You Oughta Know"
Her first album, Jagged Little Pill, sold more than 30 million copies worldwide. Featuring singles like "You Oughta Know," "Head Over Feet," "Hand in My Pocket," and "Ironic," it was the best-selling debut album by a female artist in the U.S. and the highest-selling debut album worldwide. Her second album, Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie, debuted at #1 on Billboard’s Top 200 chart.

15. Broken Social Scene – “Superconnected”
An ensemble indie rock band (with a growing international following), BSS can have as many as 17 members. Former and occasional bandmates include Leslie Feist, Emily Haines (Metric), Bill Priddle (Treble Charger), and Amy Millan and Evan Cranley (Stars), to name a very few.

16. Feist – “1234”
Leslie’s Feist’s shreddy voice was caused from her time with Calgary punk band Placebo in the 90s and now serves her well on her quieter, more reflective efforts, which include “Mushaboom,” “1234,” “My Moon My Man,” and “Sea Lion Woman.”

17. Arcade Fire – "Intervention"
With only seven years under their belt, this Montreal-based band has already released three albums—Arcade Fire, Funeral, and Neon Bible—with the last two being nominated for Best Alternative Music Album at the 2005 and 2008 GRAMMY Awards.

18. K’Naan– “Waving Flag”
Toronto-raised, Somali-born rapper K’naan’s hit “Waving Flag” was already a hit when it was re-released by Canada’s Young Artists for Haiti to benefit aid relief for Haiti and re-mixed yet again as the official anthem of the 2010 FIFA World Cup. Can it get any bigger than that?

19. Tegan and Sara – “Here I Am”
Tegan and Sara are identical 30-year-old twins from Calgary who have developed a devoted following for their indie pop/rock/New Wave music. Since releasing their first album, Under Feet Like Ours in 1999, five more have followed. Their popularity in part is due to their live performances, where the twins share personal stories and banter.

20. Stars – “Take Me To the Riot”
Members of Stars—vocalist Torquil Campbell and keyboardist Chris Seligman—are also members of Broken Social Scene. Quite prolific, they’ve released 12 albums since 2001 and several of their songs have been featured on the American teen drama, “The OC.”

Written by: Reni Walker

Project Runway: Rock The Runway!

Guest Blogger — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 16:28:00 GMT

Strut the streets with these ultra fun songs!

A good runway tune uplifts, fits with the story of the collection and lets models strut their stuff while marching down the catwalk. What makes a good runway song? These songs are inspired by the personalities of Models of the Runway and would assist any fashion diva (including yourself) in walking like you own the place. Get to iTunes and download immediately!

Paparazzi – Lady Gaga
Designer most likely to use this song: Michael Kors.

Alexis Broker’s favourite runway song is Poker Face by the fashion darling de jour (memorably used in a Michael Kors show a while back). Whether you love her or hate her, you probably have at least one Gaga song on your iPod (come on, admit it). Paparazzi is a great fit for the runway, too. I can imagine my favourite models walking with purpose to this one, stopping at the end of the runway to strike a pose for those photogs.

Do Ya Think I’m Sexy – Rod Stewart
Designer most likely to use this song: Evan Biddell

Shame on Sarah Bell for choosing I Know You Want Me by Pitbull as her favourite song to walk to. I can’t say whether she wins Models of the Runway or not, but she doesn’t have my vote. In any case, I’ll recommend this Rod Stewart classic to Ms. Bell. I think it would be amazing to see this season’s onesies grooving along to this archetypal “I know I’m the ***” tune. And you know Evan Biddell thinks he’s the ***. Ahem.

All Along the Watchtower – Jimi Hendrix
Designer most likely to use this song: Alexander McQueen

Monique Darton, on the other hand, gets high fives plus kudos for choosing both 311 and Jimi Hendrix as her picks for favourite runway song. I like a girl with an attitude. Though I can think of a million and one uses for 311 songs, Hendrix is an icon and fashion loves icons. Who wouldn’t want to walk to this classic rock power song? It’s everything you could want and more in a song.

Womanizer – Britney Spears (Teenagers Remix)
Designer most likely to use this song: GSUS

No one can fault Britney Oldehoff for her choice – Britney is an inspiration for all us who’ve been targeted by a player. Is it too much information to tell you that I’ve strutted down the street, mouthing along to this classic, imaging kicking a certain fellow in the nether regions? Regardless, I feel fierce when I use my front hallway as a runway while grooving to this song.

The Fear – Lily Allen
Designer most likely to use this song: Stella McCartney.

Kasey Ashcraft chose Material Girl by Madonna as her favourite runway song, but I’m going to update this classic with Lily Allen’s modern-day equivalent. The Fear is a biting criticism of everything society holds dear, but it’s so catchy, you almost forget that the song is about the material world. It does make you think, though, and it’s fun to dance to.

Paris by Friendly Fires ft Au Revoir Simone (Aeroplane Remix)
Designer most likely to use this song: Henry Holland.

Oh Lorena Angjeli, even when you’re wearing a ridiculously large denim skirt, you’re still super cool. So, it’s no surprise that you’ve chosen this feel-good hipster remix as your favourite song. Can we hang out sometime? Maybe you can introduce me to some of your model friends? Maybe we can go on holiday together. Sigh.

Stronger – Kanye West
Designer most likely to use this song: Dior

Hi Megan Davis. You’re a pretty girl, it’s true. You’ve got that down home charm, the girl next door thing is down pat. But your favourite runway song reveals your naiveté. I Got It From My Mama by will.i.am is clearly a sophomoric choice. I’ve taken the liberty of choosing a superior hip hop song for your runway walking pleasure. You’re welcome.

Stepping Stone – Sex Pistols
Designer most likely to use this song: Vivienne Westwood

Canadian model Brandise Danesewich chose Nervous Breakdown as her runway anthem, which is a great song, but Stepping Stone is a tad more accessible. I love that this song is a Monkees cover and it’s great that one of the lines is “You’re reading all those high fashion magazines, the clothes you’re wearing, girl are causing public scenes.”

Heads Will Roll – Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Designer most likely to use this song: Marc Jacobs

It’s true, none of the models picked this one. It’s my personal strutting down the street song. Whenever this song pops on, I imagine myself on a grand runway, in stacked stilettos prancing above a million photographers, all eyes on me. So indulge me and download it. It’s an amazing song, so dance til you’re dead.

The Doors – Break on Through
Designer most likely to use this song: Rodarte

This is a classic catwalk song and it’s perfect for coaxing the rock chic out of all of us. With studded detailing on almost everything this year, we all need some rock inspiration. That’s why I completely agree with Holly Riding’s choice: The Doors.

Written By: Nicolle Weeks

Playlist: Getting Dressed on Date Night

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 14:03:00 GMT

You’ve got yourself a date, and he’s cute and funny. That’s pretty awesome already. Here’s a list of high-energy songs to get you psyched for the big night out―and help remember that you’ve got plenty to offer yourself.

Electric Feel – MGMT
This slinky, sliding mid-tempo song is a good one to start with. Aim to be as mysterious as MGMT’s muse—there’s no need to put all your cards on the table too soon.

Best lyric: Sun in the amazon/with the voltage running through her skin/Standing there with nothing on/she gonna teach me how to swim

Mixed Emotions – Rolling Stones
Let’s face it: none of us have a spotless romantic history. Flip through your closet while reminding yourself that it’s enough to have fun tonight, and not get too wound up in the deeper meaning of it all.

Best lyric: Life is a party/Get out and strut

Instant Pleasure – Rufus Wainwright
Shake off the bitterness of past romances gone wrong, with this melodic, tongue-in-cheek bit of singalong fun.

Best lyric: I don't want somebody to love me/Just give me sex whenever I want it.

Amanda Blank – Make-up
Sometimes, picking an outfit is incredibly stressful. Never mind figuring out how to do your face.

Best lyric: Smoke a cigarette/I'm not ready yet

Bootylicious – Destiny’s Child
Don’t feel nervous. He’s lucky you’d deign to go out with him.

Best lyric: I'm hoping you can handle all this jelly that I have/Now let's cut a rug while we scat some jazz

Lady Gaga – Beautiful, Dirty, Rich
Put on this one and imagine yourself lying on a pile of money, while dancing around in your underwear. Yeah, there’s no deeper meaning here.

Best lyric: Our hair is perfect, while were all getting shipwrecked, it's automatic, honey but we got no money

Men in Love – The Gossip
Alright, we’re solidly back into heady crush territory. Phew. This cute, happy-go-lucky celebration of love is perfect.

Best lyric: I haven't felt this way/Since I was seventeen/You know what I mean/Guilty of love in the first degree

Burning Up – Madonna
Let’s face it, you like this guy. This track from before the Material Girl got baby fat injected into her face (or whatever) is pure, unadulterated lust.

Best lyric: I'm not blind/ and I know/That you want to want me but you can't let go/ Come on, let go

Notorious BIG featuring R. Kelly - F**king You Tonight
Yeah, it’s dirty, but don’t say you weren’t wondering. Plus there’s nothing like lip synching to a little Biggie to boost the ego.

Best lyric: Girl you look fine, like a windface Rolex, you just shine

Giving Him Something He Can Feel – Aretha Franklin
Alright, you’re looking good and ready to go. Belting it out with her perfect caramel voice, Aretha is here to close the door behind you.

Best lyric: So I wrote this song for you/To prove that real things/Do come true

Written by: Denise Balkissoon

The Party Mama Playlist

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 14:40:00 GMT

I Will Survive – Gloria Gaynor
This break-up cliché of a song may actually raise the spirits of the party mama's family, who are certainly pleased the control-freakery is now over and they are on the dance floor partying like its 1979. The real joy comes from the realization that they have another year until the next Christmas do, within which time they shall move to the Amazon and assume new identities.

Party in the USA – Miley Cyrus
Although you may hate that you love a song by popstrel Miley Cyrus, this one's a guilty pleasure. It’s also in the Top 20 and everyone knows that unless it’s a dance floor classic, no stale tunes will be on this party mama’s play list. The other added bonus is that Miley is an excellent role model for your teenage daughter: she has achieved fame, fortune and notoriety by the age of 17 (although you’re gunning for celeb-status by 16 for your little mini party mama). More importantly, when seen at publicity events Miley sports just the right amount of blue eye shadow, a skill that should be mastered by all girls.

Live to Tell – Madonna
A hymn sung by the decorators, florists, bakers, and others sucked into the party mama’s vortex of impossible-to-achieve expectations.These folks are on the inside track when it comes to Medusa’s, sorry, mama’s psychosis and they hope to live another day to tell other contractors to head straight for the hills when she comes a ‘callin.

Mercy – Duffy
Sung by the party mama’s significant other, loyal friend, sister, child or anyone within a 10-kilometre radius of this unhinged woman, all of whom are praying for either a merciful end or the serenity to accept that their involvement in this woman’s impending social gathering cannot be stopped. Don’t be surprised to also find this group humming Dido’s White Flag as they are surely going down with this mama’s ship.

Take Your Mama – Scissor Sisters
One line of the song says "gonna take your mama out all night…get her jacked up on some cheap champagne." And champers is exactly what this mama needs to take the edge off or give her the confidence to sing unaccompanied and unabashedly off key to a cozy gathering of approximately 300 people at her son’s bar mitzvah.

Take it Like a Man – Dragonette
This song begins "I get a little bit vicious, that’s why you love me." Could this be why we really love our party mama and why we chose her as a life partner? Is it a need for punishment? Is it the odd butt-kicking here and there to get the juices flowing and to keep us in line? Freudian associations aside, without this iron lady’s one-track mind, regular marching orders and whip-cracking, we probably wouldn’t be celebrating such a memorable do, would we?

Number 1 – Goldfrapp
A tune that is a must for a wedding and therefore a definite contender for an over-the-top party. Why? This party is a great opportunity to tell your loved ones that they are tops in your book. Clearly the party mama’s family or the person that is the object of this single-minded obsessive party planning is likely a nominee for ‘Number 1’, so this song is a no-brainer. Also, the song allows the party mama to show her guests that she truly cares about her son/daughter/husband (fill in blank as necessary), so much so that she would throw them this outlandish shindig. Would a cheaper, more meaningful, intimate gathering achieve the same thing? In her eyes, not so much.

Waterloo – Abba
As Napoleon came to his Waterloo, so very nearly does the Slice party mama time and again when she averts the caterer’s dreadful menu suggestions, the horror of absentee make-up artists and AWOL guests. "You can’t get a record exec to my daughter’s birthday/musical showcase? Off with your head!" Okay, well not exactly, but you get the picture.

Written by: Anne Marie Kirsten

Watch the new season of Party Mamas on Slice Tuesday nights at 8pm ET or watch full episodes in the slice.ca video centre.

Holiday Harmony

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 14:20:00 GMT

The holidays: for many it’s the best time of the year, full of presents, parties, and a plethora of yummy baked goods, while others feel aggravated once the calendar takes that chilly dip into December. It’s a fact that a steady diet of Mariah Carey squealing “Jingle Bells” is enough to send even the happiest of people around the bend. If you’re feeling more Scrooge than Santa, you’ll enjoy this seasonal sampling of some less-conventional holiday tunes.

Peace on Earth/Little Drummer Boy – Bing Crosby and David Bowie
Back in 1977, this unique pairing of the traditional and the modern raised many an eyebrow. How would the staid Bing mesh with the flamboyant Bowie? Turns out, very well thank you! Much like mixing chocolate and peanut butter, there’s no rhyme or reason—the end result is pure bliss. This track, a combo of two of the most beloved seasonal standards, has become a classic in its own right.
Best lyric: I pray my wish will come true, for my child and your child too. He'll see the day of glory, see the day when men of good will, live in peace, live in peace again. Peace on Earth, can it be? Can it be?

Do They Know It’s Christmas – Band-Aid
The clanging opening bells, Bono, Duran Duran, Boy George…Sting! It’s the grand-daddy of charity singles! Sir Bob Geldof invited all his mates to participate in what turned out to be the who’s who of the UK music industry circa 1984. Twenty-six years later, this song still gives goose bumps. Unfortunately, its message is needed as much now as it was back then.
Best lyric: It's Christmastime, There's no need to be afraid. At Christmastime, we let in light and we banish shade. And in our world of plenty we can spread a smile of joy. Throw your arms around the world at Christmastime.

Fairytale of New York – The Pogues featuring Kirsty MacColl
Nothing says the holidays more than a stinky, drunk Irishman singing a ditty about good times in the Big Apple. This humble tune once thought to be just an Indie gem is now one of the most popular non-traditional holiday anthems around. Grab yourself a pint and slur yourself silly.
Best lyric: You were handsome; you were pretty, Queen of New York City. When the band finished playing, they howled out for more. Sinatra was swinging, all the drunks they were singing. We kissed on a corner then danced through the night. The boys of the NYPD choir were singing Galway Bay, and the bells were ringing out for Christmas Day.

Trim Up the Tree – How the Grinch Stole Christmas Soundtrack - animated
Kids of all ages (and I’m counting myself in that demo) get a chuckle out of this crazy carol consisting of fabricated vocab from the Dr. Seuss animated television special. It’s silly in a totally juvenile way and that’s not a bad thing! Top marks for creating lyrics such as “pantookas” and “whiffer bloofs.” Why analyze such joyous Who-ville fun? It’s fantastic and guaranteed to put a smile on the face of the Grinchiest of Scrooges!
Best lyric: Trim up the tree with Christmas stuff, Like bingle balls, and whofoo fluff. Trim up the town with goowho gums and bizilbix and wums. Trim every blessed window and trim every blessed door. Hang up whoboohoo bricks, Then run out and get some more!

A Marshmallow World – Dean Martin & Frank Sinatra
Imbibed a few too many rum and eggnogs? Here’s the perfect track for those liquored-up, late-night holiday sing-a-longs. In the live version of this Rat Pack classic, Dean and Frank sound a little too sauced for their own good. The holidays are a time to drink and be merry. Just be careful not to knock over the Christmas tree while you’re at it.
Best lyric: It's a marshmallow world in the winter, when the snow comes to cover the ground. It's the time for play, it's a whipped cream day. I wait for it the whole year round.

All I Want for Christmas Is You – Olivia Olson
Taken from the soundtrack of “Love, Actually”, this pop-tastic piece runs rings around the saccharine schmaltz recorded by pariah Mariah. Young Olivia was only 10 years old when she lit up movie screens with this rendition. Like the film it concludes, it’s full of energetic optimism just perfect for the ever-hopeful holiday season.
Best lyric: Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas. This is all I'm asking for. I just want to see my baby, standing right outside my door. Oh I just want you for my own. More than you could ever know. Make my wish come true. Baby all I want for Christmas is... you.

I Was Born on Christmas Day – Saint Etienne featuring Tim Burgess
Take the breathy energy of Sarah Cracknell, add a guest-starring dose of The Charlatans’ leading man, Tim Burgess, wrap them up in a big red bow and you’ve got this Christmas cracker of a tune. The lyrics tell a rambling tale of one couple’s antics but it’s one of the least seasonal Christmas tunes out there. Saint Etienne co-founder Bob Stanley was actually born on Christmas Day; hence, the title. It’s the perfect appetizer for revellers who want a taste of Christmas but not a whole plate full.
Best lyric: Getting groovy after Hallowe’en. Mid-November got back on the scene. I’m so glad that I just got my pay. I was born on Christmas Day.

Christmas with the Devil – Spinal Tap
Your boyfriend didn’t gift you with the number-one choice on your wish list while your family decides it’s your turn to whip up the entire Christmas dinner. Sometimes the holidays aren’t the cozy fireplace-filled fantasy we’re after. For moments of holiday angst, David St. Hubbins, Nigel Tufnel et al have crafted a Christmas nightmare to go with your stocking full of coal.
Best lyric: The elves are dressed in leather, and the angels are in chains. (Christmas with the Devil) The sugar plums are rancid, and the stockings are in flames (Christmas with the Devil).

Written by: Jackie Middleton

New Year's Eve Playlist

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 14:15:00 GMT

So you can party like it’s 1999

New Year's Eve—the quintessential evening for a new beginning, debauchery, and killer shoes. I struggled with this playlist, but in the end decided the music should be about looking forward, acknowledging the naughtiness of the evening (drinking, making out, or whatever it is you find yourself doing), and kickin’ it on the dance floor. So on that note:

Rehab – Amy Winehouse
This speaks for itself. I’m sure there is a good portion of the population that goes to work the next day still tipsy.

Best Lyrics: They try to make me go to rehab / I say NO NO NO

The Boys Are Back in Town – Thin Lizzy
No one parties alone. You know this big night is going to be spent with your best buddies or someone you think is cute. You’re guaranteed to get into some trouble and have a story that is worth singing about later. Besides, everyone loves a good classic rock song.

Best Lyrics: That jukebox in the corner blasting out my favourite song, the nights are getting warmer, it won't be long won't be long till summer comes

Please Take Me Home – Blink 182
You may have beer goggles on, or you may have spied someone across the room early in the evening, but at some point, this is what you’re thinking to yourself. “Please take me home. This is the best time we ever had.” Unfortunately, there is always the aftermath.

Best Lyrics: Give in, forget the past / Be strong when things fall apart

Waiting for the Night – Depeche Mode

It’s this kind of slow song, for this kind of night, that makes babies happen. Close your eyes, smell their freshly washed hair, hold them closer than is appropriate, and dream of hot things to come.

Best Lyrics: I’m waiting for the night to fall / When everything is bearable / And there in the still / All that you feel is tranquillity

Dance Dance – Fall Out Boy

How much does this remind you of Footloose? Kick off those heels or shiny dress shoes, unbutton that shirt, toss your hair, and GIVE ‘ER!

Best Lyrics: You always fold just before you're found out / Drink up it’s last call

Sweet Child O’ Mine – Guns n Roses
Every party needs a really good air guitar track. Not only is this sound bound to encourage people to rock it out, but you may get some great karaoke going on. Everyone knows the words to this song (at least the first few lines...).

Best Lyrics: She's got a smile that it seems to me / Reminds me of childhood memories [Because EVERYONE knows THESE lines]

Time Is Running Out – The Muse
A rather fitting title for the big night. Also a killer track from a great band.

Best Lyrics: You're something beautiful / A contradiction / I wanna play the game / I want the friction

The Whole World – Outkast
Chin up, it’s a new year. You (and the whole world) are starting a new chapter this year. Look forward, don’t look back, and dance while you’re at it.

Best Lyrics: Cause the whole, world, loves it when you don't get down

Umbrella – Rihanna (VNDLSM remix)
Tired of the original song? Here’s a great dirty electro remix that is bound to get everyone out on the dance floor. It’s Top 40 you hate to love and love to hate, but with an edge. Now go cut a rug!

Best Lyrics: These fancy things, will never come in between / You're part of my entity / Here for infinity

Lovely Day – Bill Withers
Did your night run really late? Is the sun rising? This is how you should greet the morning. The first morning of the new year. Love, sun, lovely day.

Best Lyrics: Then I look at you and the world's all right with me / Just one look at you and I know it's gonna be / A lovely day

Written by: Natalie Gooding

Inspired by the Real Housewives: A Double Shot of New Jersey and Atlanta

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 17:13:00 GMT

What a wonderful time to be a Slice girl! With not one but two new Real Housewives series to keep us company into the chilly autumn nights, it’s time to grab the champagne and some tunes to toast the arrival of our new besties from New Jersey and Atlanta. Thought the gals from the Big Apple and the O.C. were a handful? You’ve seen nothing yet!

The Bitch Is Back—Elton John
Or shall we say the bitches are back?! We love the Real Housewives for their outlandish, catty behaviour yet hate and envy them for their spend-a-thon benders. It’s a perfectly entertaining love-hate combination!

Best lyric: I can bitch, I can bitch ‘cause I'm better than you. It's the way that I move, the things that I do. I entertain by picking brains; sell my soul by dropping names.

Money Honey—Lady GaGa
These Real Housewives are hardly the pinafore-draped damsels that would come knocking to borrow a lowly cup of sugar. Baking pies? Isn’t that what nannies and housekeepers are for?

These ladies are too busy boosting the economy with their brazen shopping sprees to be Miss Susie Homemaker. It’s in their DNA to spend profusely, receive exorbitant gifts and not feel guilty.

Best lyric: That's M-O-N-E-Y, so sexy. Damn I love the Jag, the jet and the mansion. Oh yeah! / And I enjoy the gifts and trips to the islands. Oh yeah!

Maneater—Nelly Furtado
There’s a reason why the Housewives franchise focuses solely on cliques of ball-busting, no nonsense women—men are putty in these gals’ immaculately manicured hands. Any male who crosses their path gets his just desserts. Consider yourself warned.

Best lyric: She's a maneater / Make you work hard, make you spend hard, make you want all of her love / She's a maneater / Make you buy cars, make you cut cards; wish you never ever met her at all!

Friend of Mine—Lily Allen
What Lily really means is, keep your friends close but your enemies closer. At first glance it might seem odd to quote The Godfather Part II’s Michael Corleone but we’re not talking the Real Housewives of Calgary here!

Best lyric: I don't want us to have a fight but in the background I can hear you chatting shi / I hear it every night. And you think you're being really cool / You've been doing it since we were both at school / Now who looks like a fool / You're no friend of mine, girl and I've known it for a while, girl.

Catfight—Gossip
The Real Housewives have their manicurists and hairdressers on speed dial for good reason. Vigorous catfights and hair pulling freak-outs are their warped idea of the perfect cardio workout. Why let a heartfelt apology get in the way of all that carb crunching?

Best lyric: I beg your pardon. Were you talking to me? / How many more times are you gonna tell you’re sorry before you take me up in my misery? / I need more than an apology.

Friends—Jody Watley
Paranoid, much? Looks like someone has been the victim of a frenemy backstabbing. Swimming with society sharks isn’t for everyone.

Best lyric: Smiles they hide behind; never know what’s on their mind…could be true deception / Jealousy and envy reign, they never want to see you get ahead / They just hold you back / Friends will let you down / Friends won’t be around / When you need them most where are your friends?

I Don’t Care—Shakespear’s Sister
You’ve seen how vicious their brawls can be and you still want to hang with this clique? Best to heed the advice of Shakespear’s Sister and adorn your bod with a "I don’t care" deceit deflector. You’re gonna need it.

Best lyric: I don't care if you talk about me / I don't care if you write it out in stone / Whenever I fall I land on my feet / I don't care. I just don't care / I don't care if you act like a queen / I don't care if you take it out on me / I've got 9 lives and I land on my feet / I don't care. I just don't care.

Bitch—Meredith Brooks
These women do not make any excuses for their behaviour. Apologizing just takes too much time when there are charitable balls to organize and new frenemies to be made.

Best lyric: I'm a bitch / I'm a tease / I'm a goddess on my knees / When you hurt, when you suffer / I'm your angel undercover. I've been numbed, I'm revived, can't say I'm not alive / You know I wouldn't want it any other way.

Sisters Are Doing It for Themselves—Aretha Franklin
Not all the housewives are insincere, kept women with nary a brain cell. Most have their own careers and are more than self-sufficient, thank you very much. Kudos to those among the Real Housewives who hold real jobs, selflessly aid charities, and rock the designer threads while doing so!

Best lyric: Sisters are doin' it for themselves / Standin' on their own two feet / And ringin' on their own bells.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

For more, please check out Jackie’s blog at www.losethatgirl.com/

Visit the show pages for the Real Housewives of Atlanta, New Jersey, New York, and Orange County for schedules.

Most Influential British Bands of All Time

Scotch Mommy — Wed, 20 May 2009 16:05:00 GMT

These English heavy-hitters helped make music what it is.

Charged with the feat of selecting songs from the best British bands of all time, I was faced with several conundrums: first and foremost, do I choose the best-known British acts or do I choose the ones I think are the best? Even though I consider myself to have, well, the best taste in the world, I decided that instead of inflicting my choices onto the lovely (and good-looking) readers of slice.ca, I would choose the bands that have made the biggest impact on the world of music in the last 50 years. The following British acts are not only geniuses, they have changed the course of pop and rock music forever. For that, they are awarded a spot on slice.ca’s list of most influential British bands of all time.

Song 2 – Blur
It was a bit of struggle to decide whether to put Blur here, because commercially, Oasis is a clear winner. But if we’re talking influential, it’s a good argument that artistically, Blur has had a much bigger influence in the last 20 years. Song 2 is one of the band’s many hits, but they have a generous helping of hits to solidify their place in Brit Pop history. Aside from Damon Albarn’s side projects (Gorillaz and The Good, The Bad & The Queen), the group influenced many copycats and arguably started the Brit Pop craze. It’s worth stating that Blur was formed in 1988 while Oasis formed in 1991.

Rehab – Amy Winehouse
It’s hard to believe that international success Amy Winehouse (better known for her habits rather than her talent) was born in 1983. Before her 25th birthday, Winehouse rose to the top of the charts with an original take on pop music, using influences from jazz and Motown to propel her to international stardom. Rehab was her first international hit and paved the way for the neo-soul movement in Britain, which Adele, Duffy, and even Lady GaGa have benefited from. Look for many more Winehouse clones in years to come.

Love Will Tear Us Apart – Joy Division
Though it’s difficult to say who was more influential—Joy Division or New Order—this song embodies the darkness of Joy Division’s ill-fated frontman, Ian Curtis. After Curtis’ suicide, his band went on as New Order and became one of England’s most influential bands of the 80s, inspiring new wave and indie music to embrace dark riffs and electronic synth beats. It’s hard to compare Joy Division and New Order, as it was a natural progression from the band’s earlier work, but Love Will Tear Us Apart remains my pick for this collective’s best song.

Paranoid Android – Radiohead
Not many people really know what to make of this Oxfordshire band. When they came onto the scene in the early 90s with their hit Creep, most dismissed them as a grungy Nirvana clone, many English reviewers went as far as to ridicule the band. Those reviewers would eat their words, though, as Radiohead released one of the most influential albums (if not the most influential) of the 90s, OK Computer. Arguably Radiohead’s best album to date, it gained the band notoriety worldwide and secured them as one of the world’s best. Paranoid Android, their opus, is perhaps their most recognized signal of greatness and has been covered by many, including Sia, and string quartets and orchestra, showing Radiohead’s ability to write music that transcends pop status. Radiohead is noted as an influence for a variety of bands, including Coldplay, Muse, Snow Patrol, and The Doves.

Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before – The Smiths
During their five-year run, The Smiths made some of the most important music of the 80s. The Cranberries, Belle & Sebastian, Oasis, and Blur all cite The Smiths as a major influence. This song was recently covered by Mark Ronson and became a hit, speaking to the timelessness and intelligence of Morrissey’s songwriting. Though Morrissey went on after the demise of The Smiths, many critics cite the 80s as his most brilliant time.

Stairway to Heaven – Led Zeppelin
These blokes (see, I used British!) were metal pioneers, inspiring countless bands to try out their metal legs and get heads banging across the word. Through the early 70s, Zeppelin toured and gained fans until their breakup in the 80s after many a few disparaging deaths made it impossible to go on. In their wake, they left music that would influence KISS, AC/DC, Heart, and Spinal Tap, among others. Stairway to Heaven is probably their most recognizable track, played at school dances up until the 90s.

God Save the Queen – The Sex Pistols
This rebellious song popularized the punk movement as we know it today. The Sex Pistols, a London-based band with very little musical training, set out to make music with stolen instruments in 1975. Though they only played for three years before Johnny Rotten left the band, causing its first incarnation to break up, their first stint inspired many bands from the 70s to today to make punk rock. Though bands like Blink 182 bastardized the genre, The Sex Pistols not only influenced genres like ska and pop punk, their influences on fashion can be seen today as well. Bands like Guns N’ Roses and The Misfits cited The Pistols as influences, too.

You Can’t Always Get What You Want – The Rolling Stones
Often fighting for the title of most influential British band ever with our number-one pick, this London-based band has carved a place in history for themselves that few bands will ever surpass. With their iconic tongue and lips logo designed by John Pasche, not only have they been around for half a century, The Stones are the longest-running band we could think of: they are still rocking 47 years after forming. Their earliest efforts in the 60s latched on to American blues and they quickly developed their own sound, gaining themselves millions of fans throughout the next four decades. They have influenced artists like David Bowie, Aerosmith, and Guns N’ Roses and still sell out shows worldwide. This song is my personal favourite by the iconic band.

Hey Jude – The Beatles
The Beatles are undoubtedly England’s most influential musical export to date. Though slightly misguided, Lennon wasn’t far off when he claimed that The Beatles were bigger than Jesus, they were at least as popular at the time, if not more so. Their music has reached every corner of the earth and has to contain the most recognizable collection of singles of all time. The Beatles have sold more than a billion records to date and though the sales of hard albums are slowing, the number of Beatles albums sold is undoubtedly growing. From their start in the 60s to their contemporary ubiquity, the influence of the Beatles can be seen across popular music. I would deign to say that the chaps from Liverpool changed the face of music forever. This single is their biggest commercial success.

Bonus Track: Not really British, but close enough (just to make Northern Irish people angry).

With or Without You – U2
I’m going to make a controversial statement and say that U2’s artistic gravity peaked in 1987 when they released the Joshua Tree. This isn’t to say the band didn’t release some whammies after that album, but it was by far their most influential and critically acclaimed album. It’s no accident that the band was working with the legendary Brian Eno when they made their masterpiece, but big-ups to Canadian producer Daniel Lanois for co-producing. With or Without You was U2’s first hit stateside and it is one of the Irish band’s most recognizable tunes. U2 has influenced tonnes of bands, including Coldplay, The Killers, and Snow Patrol.

Written by Nicolle Weeks

Visit our Your Call to weigh in on the debate.

Weekend Warriors

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 18:04:00 GMT

Canadian rockers Loverboy gleefully sang that everybody’s working for the weekend. Who knew Mike Reno and gang could be so right?! When the work week is monotonous, bills are screaming to be paid, and you have no time to yourself, just think ahead to the weekend where all delights await!

Friday I’m in Love – The Cure
Wishing weekdays away? Join the club! All the best adventures are on tap over the weekend. Use Friday to jump-start two days of indulgence.

Best lyric: Monday you can fall apart. Tuesday, Wednesday break my heart. Thursday doesn't even start. It's Friday I'm in love.

Friday Night – Lily Allen
Post-work drinks after a dreadful week and cheeky Lily is suited and booted, ready to take on all comers. If you want your night to be uneventful, stay away from swaggering girls like Lil!

Best lyric:: Don't try and test me ‘cos you'll get reaction, another drink and I'm ready for action. I don't know who you think you are, but making people scared won’t get you very far.

Saturday – Saint Etienne
Ah, Saturday mornings! No alarm clock to obey. No morning commute. A hangover? No problem! Take a few hours to recover and then start all over again as the evening descends.

Best lyric: Sunshine coming in through my window, painting patterns upon the pillow. Draw the blind, just in time. Trying to wake up but minds still foggy, someone pour me another coffee, strong and black, half a sack. Hey! Every Saturday. Get up late but it's okay.

Saturday Night – Bay City Rollers
All praise the crown jewel of the weekend, Saturday night. Nobody does an ode to Saturday like the Rollers. Tartan-trimmed trews, completely optional.

Best lyric: At the good ole rock and roll road show, I gotta go.Saturday Night, Saturday Night. Gonna rock it up, roll it up, do it all, have a ball. Saturday Night, Saturday Night. It's just a Saturday Night. It's just a Saturday Night. It's just a Saturday Night. S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y night!

Saturday Night’s Alright for a Fight – Elton John
The idea of Elton throwing punches is a bit off but whatevs. See, isn’t this song a prime example of what weekends were made for? Reinvent yourself! When Monday morning slinks back around, be crowned Ms. Popular around the water cooler with your gossip-worthy misadventures.

Best lyric: Don't give us none of your aggravation. We had it with your discipline. Saturday night's alright for fighting, get a little action in. Get about as oiled as a diesel train. Gonna set this dance alight ‘cause Saturday night's the night I like. Saturday night's alright alright alright.

Saturday Night – Suede
We all need the opportunity to unwind from career stresses and demands and who better to help but our friends? A night out with the gang will make all worries distant and will help boost your spirits for the new week ahead.

Best lyric: Today she's been sat there, sat there in a black chair, office furniture, but it'll be alright. ‘Cos tonight we'll go drinking we'll do silly things, and never let the winter in. And it'll be okay like everyone says, it'll be alright and ever so nice.

Sunday Morning – k-os
If you’re in demand as much as dear k-os with a whirlwind lifestyle of 24/7 excitement, you would wish for Sunday morning. Peaceful, calm hours blanketed by a comfy, warm duvet. Can you blame him?

Best lyric: Everyday is Saturday night, but I can't wait for Sunday morning, Sunday morning.

Pleasant Valley Sunday – The Monkees
Backyards and barbecues were born with lazy suburban Sundays in mind. Stuck in the city? Enjoy a picnic in an urban park. With your friends in tow, the party is halfway there.

Best lyric: Another Pleasant Valley Sunday. Charcoal burning everywhere. Rows of houses that are all the same and no one seems to care.

Sunday Sunday – Blur
Ah, weekend traditions. Big meals, mindless entertainment, some habits are tough to break but it’s the weekend so indulge. To-do lists and rushing about are best left for the working week.

Best lyric: Sunday, Sunday here again in tidy attire. You read the colour supplement, the TV guide. You dream of protein on a plate, regret you left it quite so late. You gather the family around the table to eat enough to sleep. And Mother's Pride is your epithet. That extra slice you'll soon regret so going out is your best bet, then bingo yourself to sleep. Oh that Sunday sleep....

Every Day Is Like Sunday – Morrissey
Dreading a return to the daily grind tomorrow? Join Mr. Mope for a dose of melancholy that will have you crying into your pillow and cursing 9-5.

Best lyric: Everyday is like Sunday; Everyday is silent and grey.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

For more, please check out Jackie’s blog at http://losethatgirl.blogspot.com/

Best Songs from the 80s

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 16:39:00 GMT

I entered high school in 1981 so I know whereof I speak when it comes to the top anthems of the ‘80s. This is the definitive list of what made the dance floors bounce or what we were watching on MuchMusic. There will be no Pet Shop Boys, Wham!, Phil Collins, or Duran Duran on this list. This is about the songs that defined a decade and a generation.

Blasphemous Rumours – Depeche Mode
“Everything Counts,” “Just Can’t Get Enough,” “Personal Jesus,” “People Are People,” “Master and Servant;” how to choose just one DM song to make a list of the top 10 songs from the ‘80s? This is one of the biggest bands of the decade with a fan base that continues to grow every year. The next-gen fans will be fighting off their 40something predecessors for tickets to the band’s North American tour in the summer of ’09. Watch the video.

Best Lyrics: I don't want to start / Any blasphemous rumours / But I think that God's / Got a sick sense of humor / And when I die / I expect to find Him laughing

How Soon Is Now? – The Smiths
Probably one of the most identifiable songs from just the first few notes, it is considered by many ‘80s children to be their anthem.Watch the video.

Best Lyrics: There's a club if you'd like to go / You could meet somebody that really loves you / So you go and you stand on your own / And you leave on your own / And you go home and you cry / And you want to die

Tainted Love – Soft Cell
In 1981, this paradigm of ‘80s synthesizer music was Britain's top single of the year and the 12” dance single “Tainted Love/Where Did Our Love Go?” hit number 8 in the U.S. in ‘82. Because it’s just that good, it recharted in the U.K. in ‘91, hitting number 5.

Best Lyrics: The love we share / Seems to go nowhere / And I've lost my light / For I toss and turn I can't sleep at night

Situation – Yaz (originally Yazoo)
Yaz was a short-lived but successful synth-dance duo from the early '80s. Alison Moyet sang vocals while Vince Clarke (from Depeche Mode) handled the ubiquitous ‘80s instrument, the synthesizer. Their first hit was “Only You,” followed by “Situation” in 1982 and then “Don’t Go.”

Best Lyrics: I remember only for an hour / Move right through me can you feel the power / I don't know what's going on / It scares me but it won't be long

Blue Monday – New Order
This band was made up of the surviving members of Joy Division after the suicide of singer Ian Curtis. Whether you call it electronic dance music or synthopop, this 1988 single was the first British dance record to cross the Atlantic and make it into the New York Club scene.

Best Lyrics: I thought I was mistaken / I thought I heard your words / Tell me how do I feel / Tell me now how do I feel

Gloria – Laura Branigan
A former backup singer for Leonard Cohen, Laura Branigan eventually landed her own record deal in the late 70s. “Gloria” was her biggest single ever, garnering her four Grammy noms, including one for Best Pop Vocal Performance by a Female.

Best Lyrics: If everybody wants you, why isn't anybody callin'? / You don't have to answer / Leave them hangin' on the line, oh-oh-oh, calling Gloria

Don’t Stop Believing – Journey
This song belongs on this list for the soaring guitar licks alone and for being the antithesis of all those ‘80s Synthopop/New Wave/Electronic dance tracks. A classic power ballad, it was chosen to ring out the final moments of The Sopranos and has also become the first pre-digital track in iTunes history to achieve online digital sales of more than 2 million units.

Best Lyrics: Just a small town girl, livin’ in a lonely world / She took the midnight train goin’ anywhere / Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit / He took the midnight train goin’ anywhere

More Than This – Roxy Music
Considered a masterful songwriter, Bryan Ferry was front man for glam-rock band Roxy Music until they split up in the early ‘80s. This haunting song was one of their biggest hits in the U.K. in 1982, along with “Avalon,” and “Slave to Love” in 1985.

Best Lyrics: It was fun for a while / There was no way of knowing / Like dream in the night / Who can say where we’re going

London Calling – The Clash
This song by one of Britain’s best punk bands was released in January 1980. While the much peppier “Train in Vain,” an unlisted song on the London Calling album, performed better on the charts, “London Calling” has gone down as a defining song of the punk rock movement.

Best Lyrics: The ice age is coming, the sun's zooming in / Meltdown expected, the wheat is growing thin / Engines stop running, but I have no fear / 'Cause London is drowning, and I live by the river

If You Leave – OMD (Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark) and Don’t You (Forget About Me) – Simple Minds
This is cheating, but the last spot had to go to two songs from two of the most enduring movies from the ‘80s: Pretty in Pink (“If You Leave”) and The Breakfast Club (“Don’t You”). While Simple Minds had other hits like “Alive and Kicking” and “Sanctify Yourself”, “Don’t You” was their only number-one single. And love it or hate it, you can’t think ‘80s without having “If You Leave” playing in your head.

If You Leave:

Best Lyrics: If you leave I won't cry / I won't waste one single day / But if you leave don't look back / I'll be running the other way

Don’t You (Forget About Me):

Best Lyrics: Tell me your troubles and doubts / Giving me everything inside and out and / Love's strange so real in the dark / Think of the tender things that we were working on

So what did I miss? What would be on your Top 10 list of '80s songs?

Written by: Reni Walker

Spoiled Rotten

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 14:00:00 GMT

If you’re spoiled and you know it, write a song.

There are some stars out there who like to pretend they’re still all down with the streets. Take J-Lo for instance and her insistence that she’s “real” even though we know she’s just an eccentric crazy lady with twins and a butterface husband who never goes into the sun. And then there are the stars who are real – they are as spoiled as Leona Hemsley’s dog and have the good sense to know it. This is the story of some of those stars. Bless them.

Stars Are Blind – Paris Hilton

I think in newer versions of Merriam Webster, you can actually catch a snapshot of Paris next to the word “spoiled”. And who else with so little talent gets a bunch of hot men to sleep with her, free clothes, and ridiculously self-congratulatory music videos? (Oh, wait…) Check out her terribly unsuccessful, over-produced rip-off of every other pop video to come before hers.

Best lyrics: If you show me real love, baby, I’ll show you mine

Rumors – Lindsay Lohan

Ahh, the “I’m famous, feel sorry for me” cliché. The thing is, I actually do feel sorry for her. Have you seen the dance sequence in the video for the song? It’s embarrassing. Doesn’t this girl have access to a bunch of professional choreographers?

Best lyrics: Why can’t you let me do the things I wanna do?

Girlfriend – Avril Lavigne

I’m often on the side of big name pop stars when people try to start claiming they’re sellouts. Like, Madonna always just wanted to *** it up and be famous, therefore, she can’t be a sellout. But Avril, who is obviously a seriously manufactured pop star somehow managed to make herself more of a commodity than she was before, thus resulting in her downfall. It’s actually deliciously ironic—her music was never good, but at least it used to qualify as a guilty pleasure. Now she’s just spoiled utterly rotten—this song is vomit-inducing.

Best lyric: Hey! Hey! (sophomoric beat)

Champagne Supernova – Oasis

If ever there was a band to write a self-important opus, it was Oasis’ ridiculously long Champagne Supernova. While the Gallagher brothers are still out gallivanting and shooting their mouths off, it’s a little sad now that they’re so old. Grow up, boys!

Best lyrics: Where were you while we were getting high?

I Get Money – 50 Cent

Who’s a better symbol of conspicuous consumption than Fiddy himself? He’s so into himself, he’s not even in on the joke. Despite the garish nature of the song and the misogynistic video, the song has infectiousness on its side. Sorry.

Best lyrics: Have a baby by me, baby, be a millionaire / I’ll write a check before the baby comes, who the f*** cares?

Material Girl – Madonna

In this unadulterated 80s nod to consumerism, Madonna spells it out for all potential suitors: buy me stuff or get no love. Though in the iconic video, she does realize that money isn’t everything (yawn), the underlying theme is that it actually is. To be on the safe side, send her diamonds just in case. See the 90s for Madonna’s pseudo-spiritual revolution and the 00s for her subsequent return to materialism and claims that she can save the world.

Best lyrics: We are living in a material world

Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend – Marilyn Monroe

Speaking of Madonna’s iconic video, you should probably see the classic scene from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes it was based on. Apparently this is the 12th most important song from a film of all time, according to the American Film Institute. Love it.

Best lyrics: Get that ice or else no dice

Miley Cyrus – Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQVynua5tHo

Miley definitely wants to have fun. With her Madonna-whore thing starting early, she’s already posed nude for Vanity Fair and, less classily, posed half-naked for her own webcam. Navigating fame can be tough for a young lady! But she’s definitely apropos for this list—word is that she’s already finished writing her memoirs. At 15.

Best lyrics: See song title.

Stronger – Kanye

Arguably one of the best pop artists of the decade, Kanye is anything but humble. With a sense of entitlement rivaling arch-nemesis George W, Kanye is often bragging about his game, his style, his money, and his skill. If the biz has spoiled anyone, it’s Kanye the Great.

Best lyrics: You should be honoured by my lateness / That I would even show up to this fake sh*t

Luxurious – Gwen Stefani feat. Slim Thug

If I hated Gwen Stefani any more, I might be able to kill her with my mind. Either way, she went from being cute-femme-girl-power-Cali-chic to booty-girl-wannabe-wife to has-been-Gavin-Rossdale. Embarrassing, for sure. This incredibly unoriginal video demotes her to a money-hungry insult to serious musicians everywhere. I bet Tony is so glad he broke up with her!

Best lyrics: Cha-ching cha-ching we're loaded and we're not gonna blow it

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

The Fame Game

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 13:01:00 GMT

Everyone wants to be a winner, baby!

Turn on your television and be bombarded by talent contests, reality, and primetime game shows—dancing, singing, being a nuisance—the goal is to be famous! Have no talent? Nowadays, it doesn’t matter. Some crave celebrity status for themselves, while others prefer to be on the periphery, a muse or even a groupie for their favourite superstar. Everybody wants a piece of the fame game.

When I Grow Up – Pussycat Dolls
The perfect wannabe song! The PCD hit pay dirt and claw a little higher on the fame game charts with this infectious ode to up-and-comers everywhere. Should be the theme song to all talent shows overpopulating our television screens.

Best lyric: When I grow up I wanna be famous. I wanna be a star; I wanna be in movies. When I grow up I wanna see the world; Drive nice cars, I wanna have groupies.

Time to Pretend – MGMT
Every success story hatches from a carefully thought out plan. In the case of scenesters, MGMT, they want to follow the path heavily trudged by the likes of the Rolling Stones, Led Zep, and Aerosmith. Even slimy, drug-laden rock stars need role models!

Best lyric: Let's make some music, make some money, find some models for wives. I'll move to Paris, shoot some heroin, and **ck with the stars. You man the island and the cocaine and the elegant cars. This is our decision, to live fast and die young. We've got the vision, now let's have some fun.

The World Is Mine – Hooverphonic
Fame goes to the heads of many, as Hooverphonic’s dance-filled ditty proves. Often it’s not enough to be famous. For some, total world domination is in order. (Sound familiar, Madonna?)

Best lyric: I'm part of this illusive show; time for me to get on stage…lights fade. Tomorrow you'll be at my feet; saturated senses set me free. It's all I need. The world the world is mine and I'm feeling so divine.

Glamorous – Fergie
Fergie wants you all to know that she’s a simple, down-home girl at heart. Champers, private jets, diamonds, a celebrity fiancé…they’re all just necessities of her occupation just like coffee, taxi chits, a computer, and the mail room guy are key to your’s.

Best lyric: We’re flying first class up in the sky. Poppin' champagne, livin' the life in the fast lane, and I won’t change for the glamorous, oh the flossy flossy.

Big Time – Peter Gabriel
Here’s how to brag about all the goodies that success has brought you with a cheeky grin and a whole load of irony. Pete’s right on the money with a song for the ultimate fame whore show-off. It’s not called show business for nothing.

Best lyric: My parties all have big names and I greet them with the widest smile. Tell them how my life is one big adventure, and always they're amazed when I show them round my house, to my bed. I had it made like a mountain range with a snow-white pillow for my big fat head.

It’s My Fault Being Famous – White Stripes
Being a superstar is not always all mansions and parties. Tussles with photographers and over zealous aficionados leave the famed feeling violated. Unfortunately, stars believe they can hand out any justice they see fit and get away with it just because of who they are.

Best lyric: I'm at the LAX just a-checkin my bag. When up comes a little paparazzi scumbag. I took a laptop slapped him up the side his head. The cops wanted to know why I left him for dead. It ain't his fault for bein’ nameless; It ain't his fault for bein’ thoughtless. It ain't his fault for bein’ shameless, but it's my fault for bein’ famous.

Super Star – The Carpenters
Ah, the sweet pain of unrequited love; the other side of fame. Being a fan can be painful when the object of your affections doesn’t know you exist. Covered many a time, this version featuring the sweet vocals of Karen Carpenter, leaves a naïve dreamy impression of a time before stalkers gave love struck fans a bad rap.

Best lyric: Long ago, and, oh, so far away. I fell in love with you before the second show. Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear, but you're not really here. It's just the radio. Don't you remember you told me you loved me baby? You said you'd be coming back this way again baby. Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby. I love you, I really do.

Star Collector – The Monkees
If you can’t be famous yourself, glom on to someone who is! Some fans would rather worship at the foot of the bed instead of the foot of the stage, yep…groupies! All bands attract these wanton types who’d rather take home a different type of souvenir. T-shirts and autographs…so lame when there’s DNA to be had!

Best lyric: She’s a star collector (collector of stars); she only seems to please young celebrities. She’s a star collector (collector of stars), how can I love her, when I just don’t respect her.

The Fanatic – Felony
1980s music fans take note: here’s a gem from the flick, Valley Girl. This somewhat creepy tune is for the admirer who takes the whole fan thing a little too seriously. If you eat, drink, sleep your favourite band, this song’s for you.

Best lyric: Limo chasin' is my thing, TV Guide and magazines, Videos, tape machines. I am the fanatic...The fanatic. I like movies and rock shows, Rock stars and radios. I am the fanatic. Can I have your autograph? Maybe a poster or photograph? I am the fanatic...

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Check out Jackie's blog at http://losethatgirl.blogspot.com/.

You need it, you love it

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 13:00:00 GMT

A Playlist to take you to Dreamland

Feeling sleep deprived? The skill of catching 40 winks—or more—is a dying art in our high-tech, tapped-in society. The pursuit of a peaceful, uninterrupted sleep is the new status symbol. Close the curtains, pull down the shades, it’s time to relax and give in to somnolence-spiked songs.

Narcolepsy – Ben Folds
Some people can sleep anywhere, anytime. Sounds like a dream come true? Not if you suffer from narcolepsy. While driving, during a date, or a job interview, falling under the sleep spell is not only embarrassingly weird it’s dangerous.

Best lyric: I should warn you. I go to sleep. I know you don't know what I mean…yet. I get upset or happy; I go to sleep. You won't know when I go to sleep ‘cause I'm not tired.

Insomnia – Faithless
The other side of the narcolepsy coin, insomnia robs you completely of shut-eye making your pillow enemy number one. Never mind 40 winks, four will do!

Best lyric: I toss and turn without cease like a curse. Open my eyes and rise like yeast. At least a couple of weeks since I last slept, kept takin' sleepers but now I keep myself pepped. Deeper still, that night I write by candle light. I find insight, fundamental movement. So when it's back this insomniac take an original tack. Keep the beast in my nature under ceaseless attack. I get no sleep. I can't get no sleep.

Golden Slumbers – The Beatles
Leave it to The Beatles to lay down this fluffy down-filled comforter of a tune. Pull on your jammies and prepare to drowse thus to dream.

Best lyric: Golden slumbers fill your eyes. Smiles awake you when you rise. Sleep pretty darling do not cry and I will sing a lullabye.

Enter Sandman – Metallica
Is it really all that surprising that heavy metal’s finest would compose an ode to night terrors? Enough said!

Best lyric: Sleep with one eye open. Gripping your pillow tight. Exit light, enter night. Take my hand off to Never Never Land. Something's wrong, shut the light heavy thoughts tonight. And they aren't of snow white. Dreams of war. Dreams of liars. Dreams of dragons fire and of things that will bite, yeah.

Can’t Get Out of Bed – The Charlatans
If there ever was a song made for Monday mornings, this one is it. The desire to stretch out one more day from the weekend past, all the while sunk into the warm environs of your duvet. Time to hit that snooze button.

Best lyric: Can't get out of bed. You're keeping it straight. This city's a mess. Can't get out of bed. You're keeping it, keep on, get it together.

In Dreams – Roy Orbison
A classic take on dreamtime from a classic performer. Sleepy hallucinations arise in many forms but by far the most wanted features the object of your unbridled desire. Let your sub-conscious have some lusty fun. You’re guaranteed to awake with a smile on your face.

Best lyric: I close my eyes then I drift away into the magic night. I softly say a silent prayer like dreamers do. Then I fall asleep to dream my dreams of you. In dreams I walk with you. In dreams I talk to you. In dreams you're mine. All of the time we're together in dreams.

You Can’t Walk in Your Sleep (If You Can’t Sleep) – The Go-Go’s
Sleepwalking, nightmares…not all siestas are peaceful. Thrashing amidst the covers is a new topic of talk show conversation. Make yourself more interesting and become afflicted with restless leg syndrome.

Best lyric: Last night you slept, you slept in fits. You smashed your windows bit by bit. You cried out—a bad dream. Horror pictures—what a scene! Which way will things go tonight? Toss and turn or sleep tight. You can't win you wonder why that sleep is one thing you can't buy. You can't walk in your sleep if you can't sleep. You can't walk in your sleep if you can't sleep.

Somewhere Between Waking and Sleeping – Air (featuring Neil Hannon)
Many of our wildest adventures take place during shut-eye. Scale new heights, meet the more confident you—it’s all possible in the land of Nod.

Best lyric: Without blindness there is no sight. You’d see further if you’d only close your eyes. In unconsciousness I can find peace. Inside prison walls I can find release. There is a place that I have seen. Somewhere between waking and sleeping. Down at the water’s edge. Somebody waits for me. Is it too late for me? It’s never too late he says.

Carnt Sleep – Saint Etienne
An overactive mind is the culprit for many a sleepless night. Title spelling errors aside, this song is actually quite hypnotic and may ease you gently into that long-awaited deep slumber. Someone else’s insomnia is your ticket to torpidity.

Best lyric: I can't sleep (can't sleep). Thinking of you constantly. I can't sleep (can't sleep). Wishing you were here with me. I can't sleep (can't sleep). Where are you please?

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Check out Jackie's blog at http://losethatgirl.blogspot.com/.

Virgin Festival 08 Playlist

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 13:00:00 GMT

I ask you, dear readers, where can you see Noel Gallagher get beat up by a random man, stand shoulder-to-shoulder with pop DJ Moby, and rock out to some of the best British bands of our time? The answer, of course, is the Virgin Festival, now in its third year in Canada. We were there to watch, listen, and deliver the goods on the highlights of VFest.

Aside – The Weakerthans

Though this Winnipeg band has been touring for years, a lot of people are still unfamiliar with their work, hence their tendency to tour the college circuit. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t darned good. Their set at VFest was not only tight, it was emotional and amazing. The crowd was devoted (if not cultish) and sang along to every song. “Aside” is definitely a personal favourite from the band, its charm exceeding its catchability. All in all, a great song with great lyrics.

Best lyrics: And I'm leaning on this broken fence / Between past and present tense / And I'm losing all those stupid games / That I swore I'd never play / But it feels okay

Take Her Back – The Pigeon Detectives

Yup, it’s straightforward British garage rock. But you can’t help bopping around to it because it’s undeniably catchy. That’s why The Pigeon Detectives, though not altogether original, are still critically acclaimed and sought after. There’s definitely a bit more of a fun vibe with this band and this song proves that The Pigeon Detectives can rock with their Britrock counterparts. Not only does the band know how to have fun, they definitely put on an energetic show.

Best lyrics: He’s not sure what he should do / She’s 17 he’s 22 / Is that too much of a difference? / So instead look what he done / He found a girl who’s 31 / Is that too much of a difference?

Have a Nice Day – Stereophonics

Definitely a heavy-hitter in Britain, The Stereophonics never quite hit that mark here in Canada. But they are still well-loved and they still know how to rock. They played this old favourite at VFest and the crowd loved it – singing along and dancing was de rigeur. It definitely brightened our day and made it better than nice.

Best lyrics: Lie around all day / Have a drink to chase

I Love to Move in Here – Moby

This little DJ came to market and he stayed to impress – the crowd packed itself into a small tent to partake in Moby’s electric beats. Everyone had to submit that Moby did a wicked job at revving up the crowd and keeping them wound up for the rest of the evening. The show ended a great line-up of awesome DJs throughout the weekend.

Best lyrics: See song title

Wonderwall – Oasis

I don’t really want to mess around. Oasis is the sort of band whose hits define them (as opposed to those epic bands whose b-sides and rarities define them) and they do amazingly well when they stick to the path. That’s why they’d be crazy to do away with their hits like “Wonderwall”. This song not only represents an era in music, but the band in its youthful prime. It’s been covered by everyone and it’s still darn catchy after hearing it in elevators and supermarkets everywhere. The band played this song at Virgin Fest even though Noel Gallagher suffered a broken rib after someone from the audience jumped onstage and attacked him.

Best lyrics: And all the roads we have to walk along are winding / And all the lights that lead us there are blinding

Do You Wanna – The Kooks

Though I’ve seen this band four times, I’m always entertained and I’m always surprised at how much they improve from show to show. The Kooks’ set at VFest was met with thousands of fans ready to partake in their brand of clever but well-composed tongue-in-cheek rocking out. The band wowed the crowd with a great performance of “Do You Wanna”, in the middle of which they asked the audience to sit on the grass – and everyone did! It was amazing.

Best lyrics: I know you wanna make love to me

The Prayer – Bloc Party

Definitely the cream of the crop in terms of British bands right now, Bloc Party is able to weave electronic music into Britrock seamlessly and convince us that this brand of ingenuity has been around for years. For their ability to write amazing lyrics, beats, music, and appeal to a wide audience, we give Bloc party a giant high five. Like, imagine someone with really big hands giving them a high five. Why did we choose this song? Because it’s just one of the many amazing ditties from this band.

Best lyrics: Make me unstoppable

Kids – MGMT

Though MGMT doesn’t always know what kind of band it would like to be (and sometimes lacks cohesion), their danceable songs are so danceable, you almost forget about their downfalls as a band. This song is by far a favourite of mine, even more so than their huge hit “Time to Pretend.” The haunting nature of the song makes it an instant classic and great to groove to.

Best lyrics: Control yourself / Take only what you need from them

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Beautiful

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Ironic songs about how we’re all beautiful by conventionally beautiful songstresses

Every once in a while, hot pop stars start to really examine deep issues, like body issues. That’s when they’re inspired to remember the days before they had a makeup artist, stylist and personal trainer and an eating disorder. In those days, jerky boys at their elementary school made fun of them for being different. And it was hurtful! So they wrote these songs about it.

Beautiful – Christina Aguilara

You’ve got to hand it to Christina. She did her best to look rather ugly in this video with her black and blonde Medusa-like locks. There is some smashing of mirrors, acceptance of different sexual orientations and body types, people with eating disorders and Christina earnestly talking about how beautiful she is.

Selected lyrics: I am beautiful, so don’t you bring me down today

Beautiful – Joydrop

Before there was Avril, there was Joydrop. This pretty-girl-turned-angry shtick worked for a while, until people realized that the band sucked. The thing that gets me about this song is that I’m pretty sure lead singer Tara Slone is one of those annoying gorgeous girls who has severe self-esteem problems and goes out with ugly fat dudes who treat them badly. Duh, dude, you ARE beautiful. Cry me a freakin’ river.

Selected lyrics: I’m not beautiful like you, I’m beautiful like me

Unpretty – TLC

Now, it’s pretty hard to dis the dead (may Left Eye rest in peace), but come on. The girl group is wearing belly tops, fake hair, and mesh shirts in the video for this song. They’re really upset about the unfair standards fat girls are forced to live up to. Then they complain about being too skinny. Poor TLC! Video highlight: when Left Eye does sign language.

Selected lyrics: I used to be so cute to me, just a little bit skinny

Bootylicious – Destiny’s Child

This is what I like about Beyoncé and her crew. At least they’re honest. Although they want to empower everyone and be inclusive, they’re acknowledging their innate hotness. It wouldn’t be an empowering body-affirming video without the montage of a bunch of different-looking people being hot, so they included that, too. Kudos to the use of male model dancers.

Selected lyrics: I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly

Half Breed – Cher

What better way to get back at a jerky racist society than to ride a horse in a native-inspired bikini, with full headdress? I’ll give you a few minutes, because I certainly couldn’t think of one. My favourite part of the video (originally from the Sonny and Cher show) is the way Cher tries to dance while on a horse. Yay!

Selected lyrics: Half breed, that’s all I ever heard / Half breed, how I learned to hate the word / Both sides were against me since the day I was born

Ugly – Sugababes

In the great tradition of beautiful pop stars singing about how ugly they feel, the Sugababes had to throw their hat in the ring. The British girl group couldn’t be more on trend here with a lovely montage of girls feeling lonely and boys feeling skinny. They even have a girl boxer! They do get extra points for showing actual weirdos in the video. All members of the girl group have an excessive amount of makeup on though, even for a music video. What’s that about?

Selected lyrics: People are all the same, we only get judged on what we do / If I’m ugly, then so are you

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Music Monthly

Robotic Hottie — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:00:00 GMT

A theme song for every month

January - Paolo Nutini

Scotland native Paolo Nutini was born in January 1987 (I feel old), so it’s fitting that he performs this beautiful song with the month’s name. The song reflects the bleak nature of the first month of the year.

Chosen lyrics: Could it be January ‘cause it feels so cold without you

One Heavy February 2008 – Architecture in Helsinki

This Australian indie band hit the scene a few years ago and has been electronically rocking ever since. This song is from their Like It Or Not EP, the latest offering from the band, and it’s a good song for a godforsaken month. If you like them, check out “Maybe You Can Owe Me,” another favourite song from the group.

Chosen lyrics: Februaryyyyyyyyyy!! *dance beats*

Arcade Fire – Winter for a Year

When you hit March in Canada, it definitely feels like it’s been winter for at least a year. And you’re still unsure if it’ll end. Definitely something this Montreal band can attest to.

Chosen lyrics: The tears are frozen long / Long before I ever thought of crying

April Fools – Rufus Wainwright

Often upbeat, Rufus doesn’t disappoint with this track from 1998’s self-titled album. If you enjoy The Shins or Regina Spektor, you’ll probably dig Rufus, whose sister Martha is also a great musician.

Chosen lyrics: Well life’s a train that goes from February on day by day / But it’s making a stop on April first

May Day! – Elvis Perkins

You may not have heard of Elvis Perkins, but he’s quite lively while maintaining utter heartbreak in his songs. His mother was aboard one of the planes that flew into the World Trade Center on September 11 and his father died of AIDS in 1992. His first release, Ash Wednesday, reflects his sadness, which is quietly beautiful.

Chosen lyrics: On May Day, May Day listen for the sound / Of the Geiger counters counting down / To one and blast off baby to the inter-space of stars

That’s Life – Frank Sinatra

It’s hard to believe that old blue eyes would have trouble in his life, what with all the gambling and cigar smoking and womanizing… Okay, it’s not that hard to believe. But like many of his songs, this one is a testament to his ability to bounce back from hardships. And it’s very catchy.

Chosen lyrics: I’ll be back on top, back on top in June

July, July! – The Decemberists

July is a rather strange month, so the song fits. The Decemberists aren’t really known for upbeat, happy songs. But this one is the light at the end of their tunnel. It’s quite captivating and appropriate all at once.

Chosen lyrics: July, July, July never seemed so strange

I Fought the Law – The Clash

This song doesn’t actually mention August. But it reminds me of those scorching days in August when, if you’re a hot prisoner such as Paul Newman in Cool Hand Luke, you need to remove your shirt to continue breaking rocks.

Chosen lyrics: Breakin’ rocks in the hot sun / I fought the law and the law won

Fiddler’s Green – The Tragically Hip

A lovely acoustic offering from The Hip, this song is a Canadian classic. And whenever I hear the Stereophonics’ version, I’m floored at its unique beauty. Revisit the song if it’s been a while since you listened to it or check it out if you haven’t yet discovered it.

Chosen lyrics: September 17th, for a girl I know, it’s mother’s day

October Is Eternal – Of Montreal

This song is sort of ominous and threatening, a little bit stressful to listen to, but interesting. There are no lyrics, but it does remind me of the way autumn turns from pretty and sunny to cold and dark. Very Halloweeny. Alternative, less scary song: Halloween by No Kids.

We Don’t Mind – Hayden Song

This song, about a day Hayden spends playing hooky with his lady friend, evokes feelings of a rainy November morning. It’s a delicate track from Hayden’s 1995 release, Everything I Long For.

Chosen lyrics: It starts to rain outside / In our phone booth we hide / It doesn't let up until five / Squished together, we don't mind

Brick – Ben Folds Five

Probably Ben Folds Five’s most popular song, this is a sad one about a trip to an abortion clinic, badly timed during the holiday season. Other choices for this most musical month: A Long December by the Counting Crows, Fairytale in New York by The Pogues and Flowers in December by Mazzy Star.

Chosen lyrics: She’s alone and I’m alone and now I know it

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Cash Rules Everything Around Me

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Play these tunes as you roll around in a pile of your riches

Cool cash…everybody wants it. How much is enough? Money doesn’t make the world go round, but it does help the rotation spin more smoothly. Invest in this cache of tunes dedicated to filthy lucre.

Money Don’t Matter 2 Night – Prince

His Highness climbs down from his lofty perch with this song about money, poverty and greed…well, at least knowledge of two out of three isn’t bad!

Best lyrics: Just when you think you've got more than enough, that's when it all up and flies away / That's when you find out that you're better off makin' sure your soul's alright

Rich Girl – Gwen Stefani (featuring Eve)

Ah, to be flush with dough and have no worries except choosing which designer boutique you’re aiming to deplete. Mrs. Rossdale is dreaming big with this ditty – perhaps a case of life influencing art?

Best lyrics: No man could test me, impress me, my cash flow would never ever end / Cause I'd have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl.

Cash Machine – Hard-Fi

It’s all right for some, living the high life buying Porsches and Jags…but for most of us, working our fingers to the bone just to grasp enough to pay for our day-to-day reality is the plain and hard truth. When high flyers like Gwen are rubbing you the wrong way, tune in to Hard-Fi.

Best lyrics: I scratch a living, it ain't easy. You know it's a drag / I'm always paying, never make it but you can't look back / I wonder if I'll ever get to where I want to be / Better believe it, I'm working for the cash machine.

Everyday I Think of Money – Stereophonics

Welsh favourites, the Stereophonics present a cautionary tale. Happiness and self-respect don’t come with a price tag. The way they see it, money only gets you into trouble and provides the means to bail yourself out afterwards. Self-reliance with a dark twist!

Best lyrics: It can't buy you love / It can't give you a soul / Can pick you up / Can down you low / Can drag you out, of the hole you dug yourself

Money (That’s What I Want) – The Flying Lizards

No beating around the bush with this tune. Sometimes it pays to be honest! Used in several soundtracks, this cover brought the Flying Lizards exactly what they desired.

Best lyric: Your lovin' give me a thrill / but your lovin' don't pay my bills

Opportunities (Let’s Make Lots of Money) – Pet Shop Boys

Striking when the iron is hot and taking a leap of faith in order to plump up the bank balance is often the only way to bring home a fatter wage packet. Sounds like it’s time to make the PSB your new career counsellors.

Best lyrics: There's a lot of opportunities / If there aren't, you can make them, make or break them / I've got the brains, you've got the looks; let's make lots of money.

The Money Song – Rufus Wainwright

Lovely Rufus realizes that dosh can cause all sorts of changes in a person. He vows not to let some extra coinage influence his raison d’être. Good luck with that, mate!

Best lyrics: If I should ever run into a lot of money tell me, would I move to New York City? If I had an apartment with a view of that city, tell me would I see the stars above me?

Money Changes Everything – Cyndi Lauper

Cyndi’s the perfect example of a performer who went from lowly bar singer to worldwide phenomenon only to plunge down again to become a ‘80s trivia question. If there was ever a reliable source that could tell you how increased wealth invites greedy friends and nasty hangers-on into your life, she’s it. Beware!

Best lyrics: They shake your hand and they smile and they buy you a drink / They say we'll be your friends / We'll stick with you till the end / Ah but everybody's only looking out for themselves and you say well who can you trust?

Money – Jamelia

Guys can be so dumb! Flashing your cash in our faces can be briefly intriguing but after we’ve been treated to shiny baubles and expensive jaunts around the globe – yet AGAIN, what we really yearn for is someone who has a connection to us, and not to the nearest ATM. Bank balance chat is so unsexy!

Best lyric: I don't give a damn, 'bout your credit card so money don't say you love me / Cash won't make me stay. I came here with my own things and I can leave the same way.

Jackie Middleton

Musician Edition: Estelle

Robotic Hottie — Mon, 26 May 2008 13:23:00 GMT

Sassy British import Estelle gives us the goods about the music that inspires her and the song that changed her life

Estelle’s one of those people that you automatically want to be around. She’s bubbly, down-to-earth and seems to sincere love chatting about her music and the things that inspire her. When we sat down to discuss her new release, Shine, she told us all about the music she listened to growing up and the tunes that she listened to while recording her latest album. Pop these tunes on for a fun summer playlist.

You Are – Estelle f. John Legend

John Legend is definitely a component in Estelle’s success, signing her to his sublabel. This duet is smooth and chill, but still rocks. Check out this lesser-known track on Shine.

Best lyrics: All of the sadness in passing / Making me feel like I'm past it

Waiting in Vain – Bob Marley

As a kid in West London, Estelle was exposed to lots of varied music, but she lists Bob Marley as a highlight. “This is how we’d do it when I was a kid,” she says. Check out “No Substitute Love” for a similarly-themed song.

Best lyrics: My heart says follow through / But I know, now, that I’m way down on your line

When You Were Young – The Killers

“When You Were Young is beautiful because the lyrics are so real! I was always looking for my first boyfriend in all these guys,” says Estelle, “That song changed my life. It’s one of my favourites. It was a lot. I’d love to work with The Killers.”

Best lyrics: He doesn't look a thing like Jesus / But he talks like a gentleman / Like you imagined when you were young

She’s So Lovely – Scouting for Girls

The BBC’s Live Lounge is notorious for asking artists to do cross-genre acoustic covers and Estelle chose this indie song when she visited the famous radio show. “The lyrics are hilarious and they’re relevant to me, cause he’s talking about a grown girl,” she laughs, “It’s cheeky – on tour, we’d just go around singing this song. I think it’s the best song on the planet. It’s something no one would expect me to like.”

Best lyrics: She's flirty turned thirty / Ain't that the age a girl gets really dirty?

Owner of a Lonely Heart – Yes and Take on Me – A-Ha

This Yes song made a comeback last year with the famed Fabric Live remix – and for good reason (it’s an awesome song). Estelle’s love for 80s songs is evident (she references George Michael’s “Faith” and her big hit a few years back was called “1980.”

“When I wrote this album, I went back to being a kid again and had fun with it,” Estelle explains, “’Cause that’s when you’re most sure, like when you’re between five and 10. No one can tell you ***. I got back to that point, now I’m just me.”

Magnificent – Estelle

Estelle wrote the entirety of Shine amidst breakups and a spell of depression. This song deals with a particularly tough break up.

“When you break up and no one else sees the inside of a relationship,” she says of a boyfriend who never gave enough, “I was the one who said get out and everyone said, ‘Where’s he going to go?’ I said, ‘He’s a grown up, I don’t care.’” Think about how much I put up with. Now they say, “You were right!” And I say, “I know!”

Best lyrics: You ain’t gonna be the one to tell me how I’m worth / because I pulled myself up from under the dirt

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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The End of a Friend

Sporty Vixen — Tue, 20 May 2008 13:02:00 GMT

Betrayal, deceit and lies—and you didn’t even get laid

Friendship can be so cruel. One day you’re best friends with Michelle Smith and the next, she’s moved her desk over to the yellow group and you have to sit next to Nelson Jones, who totally hasn’t started wearing deodorant yet. The worst part is that you thought you were going to be best friends for life. At least, that’s what it said on the heart pendant that you bought together at Ardene. I mean, I randomly wanted to share some of the best friend betrayal songs with you for no particular reason. Enjoy.

We Used to Be Friends – The Dandy Warhols

Most probably based on the broken friendship between the Dandies and sister band The Brian Jonestown Massacre, this song was also used in the opening credits of one of my old standby faves: Veronica Mars. A great song for reminiscing about friendships of yore. Keep the tissue box nearby.

Best lyrics: A long time ago, we used to be friends / But I haven’t thought of you lately at all

Ill Placed Trust – Sloan

Isn’t it nice to have an awesome best friend that you can trust? Until he or she turns around and squashes your trust like an insignificant little insect. Moral of the story: Create an impenetrable wall around yourself and never, ever care about anyone.

Best lyrics: Ill-placed trust buried in dust

What About Your Friends – TLC

The classic anti-friend song, this TLC tune from the early 90s tells the tale of the sad state of a friendship ruined by fame and money. Check the video for some fashion inspiration. No, really.

Best lyrics: Sometimes my vision gets a little hazy / Can’t tell who I should trust or who I should just let be / What about your friends? Will they stand their ground or will they let you down?

Losing a Friend – The Cardigans

Perhaps the most earnest song on the list, it’s also the saddest. It’s not angry, just sad about the prospect of losing someone (you thought was) awesome.

Best lyrics: You're losing a friend / You got it all wrong / It's not about revenge

We Trusted You – The Transplants

An angry account of betrayal, The Transplants’ punky style is definitely apropos for this list. Scream along in solidarity!

Best lyrics: We trusted you, we put out a helping hand / Only in return we get a stabbing in the back

Friend of Mine – Treble Charger

Before Sum 41 was the landmark Canadian rock band, Treble Charger ruled the indie scene in the 90s. It’s no surprise that Treble Charger frontman Greg Nori produced Sum 41 into an international success. This song, from 1997 release Maybe It’s Me, bemoans the absence of a wayward ex-friend.

Best lyrics: I’m not sure what you say makes any difference anyway

An Honest Mistake – The Bravery

This electro-indie band is amazing and this song doesn’t disappoint. It deftly conveys an incident in which two friends are separated. Listen on repeat where your ex-friend can hear and sing along hatefully to the “honest mistake” part.

Best Lyrics: People don’t mean a thing to you / They move right through you, just like your breath

Friend Is a Four Letter Word – Cake

This is a dark song by the oft-giddy California band, but it definitely gets the point across if you’re talking about the bitter end of a friendship. From their 1998 release, Fashion Nugget, this song was also used in the credits for the animated show Daria.

Best lyrics: To me, coming from you, friend is a four letter word / End is only part of the word that I heard

You’re Supposed to Be My Friend – 1990s

If you haven’t heard of this quirky Scottish indie band, check out their album Cookies, which rated in last year’s list of Rolling Stone’s top 50 albums. This song, the second single from their debut album, is pretty self-explanatory.

Best lyrics: It's hard to get you on the phone / You're never home!

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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Gossip

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 12 May 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Quite often talk is cheap and it’s never as thrifty as when it involves gossip. Many people show a public distain for the sport of mud-slinging, but privately, it’s a whole different ballgame. Smear campaigns and scandal sharing are the glue that bonds today’s tribes. It’s dishy and delicious, frequently hilarious, and occasionally shameful. It’s time to revel in it, but watch your back!

Our Lips are Sealed – The Go-Go’s (or, Fun Boy Three)

The Go-Go’s Jane Wiedlin and Terry Hall of UK Ska faves, Fun Boy Three, crafted this ditty about several vacuous counterparts and their loose lips. This song was ranked by Rolling Stone magazine as one of the top 100 greatest pop songs and has been covered repeatedly. Spare your ears the Hillary Duff version and pick one of the two originals.

Best lyrics: Can you hear them? They talk about us. Telling lies…well that's no surprise. Can you see them; see right through them. They have no shield, no secrets to reveal. It doesn't matter what they say in the jealous games people play. Our lips are sealed.

I Heard a Rumour – Bananarama

If there ever was a group many of us kiddies wanted to be part of, it was Bananarama. Three best mates sharing clothes, meeting famous pop stars, and having a laugh while gracing radio waves and TV screens! Everyone wanted to be part of their gang until they suffered massive friendship fallout and stopped speaking. It seems that rumours get the best of even the coolest cliques.

Best lyric: I'm just thinking about those lonely nights when I waited for your call. 'Til I found out all my friends were right, ooh, ooh. I didn't know you at all. I heard a rumour. Ooh, ooh, I heard a rumour. They say you got a broken heart. I heard a rumour.

I Don’t Care – Shakespears Sister

Upon leaving the slagging off fest that was Bananarama, Siobhan Fahey reinvented herself as the gothy Shakespears Sister. Spelling wasn’t their strong point, but moody verses crammed to the brim with anger and reproach were. Whenever you need a mantra to shrug off the nonsensical tittle-tattle emanating from your enemies, arm yourself with this barb.

Best lyric: I don't care if you talk about me. I don't care if you write it out in stone. Whenever I fall I land on my feet. I don't care. I just don't care.

Rumours – Timex Social Club

All hail the one-hit wonder! California’s Timex Social Club hit pay dirt and the #8 Billboard spot with this R & B/rap marriage in hearsay heaven. Looks like they took their own advice and vanished to a place where nobody speaks of them!

Best lyric: Look at all these rumours ruining me everyday. I just need some time…some time to get away from all these rumours. I can't take it no more.

They Don’t Know – Tracey Ullman

Ah! Love amidst the blether of busybodies. When two people only have eyes for one another, outsiders can feel left out, thus turning to idle talk. Here’s a tune to celebrate just you two against the world.

Best lyric: I get a feeling when I look at you wherever you go now I wanna be there too. They say we're crazy but I just don't care and if they keep on talkin', still they get nowhere. So I don't mind if they don't understand when I look at you and you hold my hand ’cause they don't know 'bout us and they've never heard of love.

Nothing Has Been Proved – Dusty Springfield with the Pet Shop Boys

In early 1960s Britain, a government scandal rocked the very core of the establishment. Take one society doctor, supply one party girl, add a liaison with one Russian diplomat, and toss in many a rendezvous with the British Secretary of State for War John Profumo. Shake it all together and—presto! —you have one humdinger of a hornet’s nest for rumours and innuendo. Cold war transgressions were popular fodder for gossip-mongers and the “Profumo Affair” fed the tabloids for years and spawned a motion picture in the 1980s.

Best lyric: (It's a scandal! It's a scandal! Such a scandal!). Last night he wrote these words to his friend: "Sorry about the mess. I'm guilty 'til proved innocent in the public eye and press." The funeral's very quiet because all his friends have fled. They may be false; they may be true. They've all got better things to do. They may be false; they may be true but nothing has been proved.

You Should Hear How She Talks About You – Melissa Manchester

Despite what your Mum told you, gossip can be beneficial. Take dear Melissa. She’s heard that a friend is not talking trash but…sweetness about a mutual chum. Oprah would be so proud! Obviously karma was watching too because Ms. Manchester carted home a Grammy for her good deed. See, nice girls can finish first.

Best lyric: I ain't tellin' tales, anybody else could repeat the things that I've heard. She’s been talkin' sweet and it's on the street. How our girlfriend's spreadin' the word.

Policy of Truth – Depeche Mode

Leave it to the Mode to get entwined in yet another emotional rollercoaster and, as a result, they’re teaching us a handy lesson. A smart gossip knows when to reveal and conceal. Just because a tidbit is fact doesn’t mean it should be shouted from the rooftops. There’s a time to dish and a time to avoid a lawsuit!

Best lyric: Now you're standing there tongue tied. You'd better learn your lesson well. Hide what you have to hide and tell what you have to tell. You'll see your problems multiplied if you continually decide to faithfully pursue the policy of truth.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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Long Distance Relationships

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 05 May 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Songs to get you through the lonely nights

In today’s hectic world, finding your significant other isn’t as easy as hooking up at the local club. Many of us are meeting our soul mates via the internet, on vacation or through far-away friends. Welcome to the pain and pleasure of the long distance relationship. If you’re dedicated, resilient and equipped with a discounted phone plan, it’s feasible to rendezvous with a happy ending. When the distance is lengthy and the next trip months away, take comfort in these songs.

If You Want Me – Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova

From the wonderful film, Once, this track aches with the yearning for an absent lover. The music and lyrics form a haunting partnership that envelopes the listener in a melancholy embrace.

Best lyrics: Are you really here or am I dreaming? I can’t tell dreams from truth for it’s been so long since I have seen you.

An Ocean Apart – Julie Delpy

A woman of many talents, actress Julie Delpy starred in Before Sunrise and contributed several songs to the soundtrack as well. This song echoes the painful reality of loving someone who lives a world away.

Best lyrics: We'll have to be so strong to keep our love from going wrong / Distance will make us cold, even put our love on hold / but soon we'll meet again and soon it'll be bright at noon again.

One More Last Kiss – Ivy

Standing at the airport departures gate grasping for one more embrace is heartbreaking! Ivy knows how uncertain such a goodbye can be. When every moment counts, one more kiss is never enough.

Best lyrics: It's just a question of how long, how long I have to wait / So one more last kiss like two prisoners / One more last kiss to hold on to.

When Will I See You Again – The Three Degrees

Covered by Erasure and Billy Bragg, this song from the 1970s was a hit on both sides of the Atlantic. For the most heartfelt rendition, it’s the original all the way. This track is the perfect chaser for Ivy’s offering above.

Best lyrics: When will I see you again? When will our hearts beat together? Are we in love or just friends? Is this my beginning or is this the end?

Next to You – The Police

When the geographically-challenged relationship is getting the best of you, take a listen to Tantric sex-god, Sting. In this song, he can’t cope with separation anxiety. While we’re all in support of grand gestures of love, robbing a bank to free up funds for airfare is a criminal don’t! Selling your old Police vinyl to grab some cash – that’s a do!

Best lyrics: I'd rob a bank, maybe steal a plane / You took me over, think I'm goin' insane / What can I do, all I want is to be next to you

I’ll Meet You Halfway – The Partridge Family

For 1970s teen idols, David Cassidy was the best of a bad lot. Despite step-mum Shirley Jones dressing him in ruffled shirts, young girls couldn’t be dissuaded from their devotion. Teen idol love is the first flush of long-distance (albeit unrequited) amour for many. Here young David offers a grown-up solution – separations can be surmountable when you split costs and distance.

Best lyric: I'll meet you halfway, that's better than no way / There must be some way to get it together / And if there's some way, I know that some day we just might work it out forever.

Telefone (Long Distance Love Affair) – Sheena Easton

Oh dear…looks like someone has a case of romantic panic. It’s that sinking feeling when you can’t contact your far-flung paramour evoking many a nightmarish scenario. Is he out with another girl? Forgotten about me? At such times, it’s best to remain calm, avoid drunk dialling, and correct your spelling once the urgency has subsided (Telefone? Shame, Sheena!).

Best lyrics: I wanna tell you what's been goin' on, operator give me Trans Atlantic / I sit alone as the night goes by / Long long distance love affair, I can't find you anywhere.

Everything Changes – Take That

Surviving a long distance relationship is never easy, but having a positive outlook and plenty of trust can work in your favour. Weather the permutations and stay true – it’s worth it!

Best lyric: Hey girl, I know the situation changed / And so much is new but something in my life remains the same 'cos everything changes but you.

Written By: Jackie Middleton

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Songs to Facebook to

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Something to listen to while you stalk people from high school

The Facebook Song – Rhett and Link

This is a bit of a cheat, because it’s actually about Facebook, but it’s pretty cute and funny. And if you’re waiting for some pictures to load into a Facebook album, this will kill some time. I tried to add these dudes as friends and they totally punked me off. Oh well. I guess they have to maintain some kinda standards.

Best lyric: I’m hooked on Facebook I’d shrivel up and die without my mini-feed

Stalker – Louis XIV

Even though the video is a disturbingly overt opportunity to show five-second video clips of hot female models (boo), the song is quite catchy in a very downbeat sort of way. Check out Louis XIV’s total departure from the song that made them a hit, “Finding Out True Love is Blind.”

Best lyric: I can stare at you all night and you won’t even notice

New Friend Request – Gym Class Heroes

Not only is this song clever and catchy, it hits the nail on the head with its fitting lyrics about a love affair over a social networking site. This song makes me want to log on right now and write a comment on my crush’s wall – and maybe even send him one of those fake “gifts” that cost $1 US.

Best lyrics: Let's face it, it's a sad situation when we have to resort to keyboards as a means of making relations

Creepin Up On You – Darren Hayes

Admittedly, I’d never heard this song before I started researching for this playlist, but this is, as 1999 would say, da bomb diggity. It’s not “good” by any stretch of the imagination, but it’s really creepy and I like to laugh at it because it’s the guy from Savage Garden singing. Love it!

Best lyrics: I've found your address / Got your phone number too

Somebody’s Watching Me – Rockwell

The reason this song has an awesome 80s Michael Jackson feel is mostly because MJ is actually on the track – it’s just before producers realized that using the “featuring” feature would make them more money. This song is a definite classic and, I think, the ultimate Facebook song. There are tons of remixes for your listening pleasure – here’s one of the many.

Best lyrics: I always feel like somebody’s watching me / And I have no privacy

We’re Going to Be Friends – White Stripes

Does anyone else think Jack Johnson is a giant penisface? Maybe that’s just me because my stupid ex-boyfriend listened to Jack Johnson all the time and I have a negative association with his music that actually has nothing to do with him. Or it could be that he’s a giant penisface. Either way, I don’t like him or his cover of this song. But this version is okay.

Best lyrics: I can tell that we’re gonna be friends

Footloose – Kenny Loggins

Look at it this way: if everyone in Hollywood is somehow connected to Kevin Bacon (the star of amazing eighties classic film Footloose), then you’re probably connected to that dude across the office by some random Facebook friends. I know, I know. Sheer brilliance!

Best lyrics: Geez Louise!

Every Breath You Take – The Police

Facebook is a bit of a stalking tool, so I couldn’t leave out the best stalking song of all time! Released a year before 1984, Sting (who still made $2,000 per day in royalties for this song alone as of 2003) says the song was inspired a little bit by his ex-wife and a little bit by George Orwell’s 1984.

Best lyrics: Every breath you take / Every move you make / I’ll be watching you

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Spring In The Air

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 13:01:00 GMT

This playlist will have you jammin’ to warmer weather

Tired of snow, ice and that bulky parka? You are not alone! We’re all fed up with snowstorms and chilly vibes. Even the calendar is beckoning us to pack up our winter woollies. After a depressing deep freeze, spring ushers in a welcome change and some appropriate sunny tunes.

They Say It’s Spring – Blossom Dearie

Looking out the window and watching fluffy flurries dance past makes one wonder…just who said it’s Spring? Wiarton Willie, the calendar? It’s easy to jump to wintery conclusions when you’re still donning snow boots while the date screams - it’s Spring. Take a lesson from Blossom (now there’s the ultimate in seasonal stage names!). Have some faith that the worst is over and soon you can peel off those clunky mukluks for good!

Best lyrics: They say it's spring, this feeling light as a feather / They say this thing, this magic we share together came with the weather too.

Here Comes the Sun – The Beatles

Like a breath of fresh spring air, comes this classic from the fab four. As we near the end of winter’s lengthy hold, the thought that the days are getting longer and warmer is enough to have you tip-toeing through the tulips in no time!

Best lyrics: Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter / Here comes the sun, here comes the sun and I say it's all right.

April in Paris – Doris Day

The giddy marriage of the City of Light and spring is commonplace in pop culture. The relationship between the bloom of new love and the season of rebirth charms the pants off lyricists and moviemakers alike. There are many tunes that soar with the delights of this season in Paris. What better way to make a fresh start but with the belle of all things pure, Doris Day?

Best lyrics: I never knew the charm of spring, never met it face to face / I never knew my heart could sing, never missed a warm embrace / 'Til April in Paris.

Spring Affair – Donna Summer

Never mind the blush of new love, Ms. Summer is breathily all hot and heavy! Spring might be as delicate as a baby lamb to some, but not to the woman who boasts the steamy season as her surname; it’s never too soon for some scorching romance.

Best lyrics: I've fallen, I've fallen / Spring affair, spring affair, spring affair and I'm hung up on you.

From This Moment On – Peach Union

Spring brings many changes – new relationships, the arrival of daffodils and tax season. For many, it signals the start of the next chapter. Peach Union offers a delightful song plump full of optimism for the dawn of the season of renewal.

Best lyrics: Things that change, never die / But like in Spring when flowers face the sky, we’re born again without pain in your eyes

Beautiful Day – U2

Carrying on with the positive vibe, U2 pledges for all of us to revel in the joys of clean air and fragrant flowers. After being shut in for the winter, the time has come to get outside and reacquaint yourself with life away from the couch.

Best lyrics: It's a beautiful day / Sky falls, you feel like it's a beautiful day / Don't let it get away.

Spring Fever – Elvis Presley

Randy dandy, Mr. Presley with his swivel hips and hunky voice is back to bewitch you with a spring fling. How can you say no to the King? He’s got the birds and the bees on his side.

Best lyrics: Spring fever, Spring is here at last / Spring fever, my heart's beating fast / Get up, get out, spring is everywhere!

Suddenly It’s Spring – Frank Sinatra

Check out the Chairmain of the Board, Mr. Sinatra. He’s smitten with the season and has broken out into song and dance! Footloose and fancy-free was never more in style.

Best lyric: Why is my heart dancing? Imagine dancing! You look at me, and suddenly it's spring / Why do I keep sighing? Not sad, just sighing, I'm young and free, and suddenly it's spring.

Spring – Saint Etienne

The warmer temperatures mean a warmer heart. It’s time to defrost and welcome a second chance. Saint Etienne in their dreamy demeanour offer up the ideal theme tune for a love revival. Spring clean your relationship and start anew!

Best lyric: It's only springtime/ Oh, you're too young to say you're through with love / It's only springtime, and I'll be different, I'll be different / I swear to you.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Sex

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:15:00 GMT

Sex doesn’t always equate to love. That’s why we’ve chronicled the lustiest ditties this side of Closer. Check out our picks for sexiest songs – or songs that talk the most about sex, at least. Whether you’re getting it or not, here are some songs to get lascivious to. Or at least have nasty thoughts to.

Doin’ It – L.L. Cool J
This might be a self-indulgent choice (and perhaps it’s telling that some of my sexy songs are chosen from the 90s – was it a sexier time or was I more attentive to sexy? Or was Justin right, ‘cause sexy faded? So many questions!), but this song is definitely my pick for sexiest song of all time. Remember the video? The title of the song is also my favourite euphemism for sex.

Sexiest lyrics: Safe sexin’ it, mad flexin’ it, all affectionate (Safety first!)

Darling Nikki – Prince
This song was put on a list of unacceptable music for teenagers by Tipper Gore way back in the 80s. In fact, it was so terrible to mention a woman masturbating, it was called “satanic.” Sexy!

Sexiest lyrics: I can’t tell you what she did to me, but my body will never be the same

A.D.I.D.A.S. – Korn
This song was perhaps written for teenage boys with dirty minds (is there any other kind?). The raw libido expressed in this song is good for, uh, rough sexytime. There are no ifs or ands (maybe some butts) about it: this song is about unrefined sexual gratification.

Sexiest lyrics: All day, I dream about sex / All day, I dream about humping

Rock the Boat – Aaliyah
Dear lord up above, when I heard this song on the television for the first time, I couldn’t believe it got past the censors. I suppose it’s suggestive without being incredibly blunt, but it’s pretty obviously that the late Aaliyah wanted some lucky gent to touch her in her bathing suit area.

Sexiest lyrics: Change positions / New positions

Ignition Remix – R. Kelly
Despite the nastiness that is R. Kelly, no one can deny that his music is a) catchy and b) sexual. This song is his height of sexy with its infectious slow beat and toot toot and bounce bounce!

Sexiest lyrics: It’s like murder she wrote / When I get you out those clothes

Dirrty – Christina Aguilera
I think this is the first music video that I was embarrassed to watch. The porn-o-riffic sentiment of this video is sure to get you hot to trot. Beware, Xtina’s stripper moves will have you losing artistic respect for her faster than America invades countries with imaginary weapons of mass destruction. It does live up to its title, though.

Sexiest lyrics: I need that (ah) to get me off / Sweatin’ til my clothes come off

Relax – Frankie Goes to Hollywood
One of the first openly gay groups in the eighties, FGTH broke down barriers and was partly responsible for bringing gay culture to the forefront. The video, featuring the band in a gay club, was “suggestive,” to say the least.

Sexiest lyrics: Relax, don’t do it, when you want to come

Buttons – Pussycat Dolls
Burlesque sex kittens PCD express their sexual frustration in this song about not getting any from the men in their immediate circle. Who knew LA beauties had such a hard time getting laid?

Sexiest lyrics: I can’t seem to get you over here to help me take this off

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Dismissed

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Songs for when they slip you a pink slip

The working world is not what it used to be. A job for life? Sorry, but such security went out of fashion with mood rings and pet rocks. Layoffs, attrition, downsizing—whatever the PC label, it’s still the axe. It’s in the news happening to everyone—young and old, no one is immune. While you’re perusing the want ads, here’s some empathetic anthems to take you from pink slips to the next paying gig. Remember, it’s not personal, it’s just business!

Work Is a Four-Letter Word – The Smiths
Most people have a love/hate relationship with work. Boss aggro, objectionable company policy, unfriendly co-workers—whatever the cause, having a hate-on with the workplace is never recommended. It’s only when your job is in jeopardy or you’re “let go” that a sudden, all-encompassing amorous regard for that waste of space replaces all the cursing.

Best lyric: 'Cause you say that work is a four-letter word. So change your life. There is so much I know that you can do. Come and see.

9 to 5 – Dolly Parton
This Academy Award-nominated ode to office workers was a universal hit. Dolly’s lyrics speak a language that even Dilbert would approve of.

Best lyric: Workin' 9 to 5. What a way to make a livin'. Barely gettin' by, It's all takin' and no givin'. They just use your mind and you never get the credit. It's enough to drive you crazy
if you let it.

Looking Out for Number One – Bachman-Turner Overdrive
Stepping on your fellow man to get ahead is just so 1980s! Unfortunately, elbowing workplace competition out of contention is alive and well. Canadian rock gods BTO serve up one of life’s corporate lessons perfectly. Looking out for your fellow man has been stomped on and replaced with a cut-throat race to the prize.

Best lyric: Yes I found out all the tricks of the trade and that there's only one way that you're gonna get things done. I found out the only way to the top is looking out for number one. And that's me; I'm looking out for number one.

Way of the World – Max Q
Max Q was the late 80s side project of INXS’ Michael Hutchence. This one-off CD was dark, moody, and featured songs about worker oppression and alienation. That’s one heck of a resume for a bitchfest around the water cooler.

Best lyric: The corporate snakes coming in to feed, on that pathetic fact known as human greed. Skin and bone being raked over those hot coals; this dump never seems to give time for human soul. And all those things that we have learnt, no time for questions, you'll just get burnt.
You'll just get burnt.

Not My Idea – Garbage
You never feel as small as you do when your future is taken out of your hands. When you’re the victim of a restructuring and find yourself with a reconfigured reality, it’s often easiest to bide your time and keep your mouth shut. Often the true magnitude of what you’ve been offered doesn’t materialize until that org chart appears and—surprise!—you now report to the intern! Here’s a tune built for the frustration of such nasties. It helps that the band is called Garbage, too!

Best lyric: I bit my tongue and stood in line with not much to believe in. I bought into what I was sold and ended up with nothing. This is not my idea of a good time. This is not my idea.

Fired – Ben Folds
Job-loss angst be gone! Ben manages to make a massive layoff sound humorous. Why fire just one when you can dump the whole lot! Me-thinks Ben has never been the one chucked from the cube farm to the curb.

Best lyric: And I just want to walk away. Won't you let me walk away sometimes? Won’t you let me walk away? Every one of you is fired.

Career Opportunities – The Clash
Here’s a case of the grass is always greener. Joe Strummer et al. are warbling away about offers that never materialized. But, honestly, I can’t see any of The Clash wanting to trade places with any of us worker bees. Looks like someone was trying to appeal to the disenfranchised masses that use their dole money for punk albums.

Best lyric: They offered me the office, offered me the shop. They said I better take anything they got. Do you wanna make tea at the BBC? Do you wanna be, really wanna be a cop? Career opportunities are the ones that never knock.

Love What You Do – The Divine Comedy
Singer Neil Hannon speaks the truth! We spend so much of our lives at work, you really do have to at least like it. It can be a hard pill to swallow but slaving away solely for the paycheque is not healthy for anyone. If loving your job comes easy, consider yourself lucky.

Best lyric: Living isn't easy. No need to make it harder. Stretch yourself until you snap.
Ditch your superstitions; lose your inhibitions. Tell them you're not coming back. If you want it, you can have it. If you need it, go and get it. Whatever it is, you've got to love it.

I Need a God Damn Job – The Replacements
Work may be a four-letter word (thanks, Morrissey) but truth be told, it pays the bills and keeps us out of the mall on many a weekday morning. Every ending is a beginning. Embrace your newfound unemployment freedom for a spell: watch Dr. Phil and the soaps ad nauseam then get back at it. The search for that dream gig is half the fun!

Best lyric: I need a God damn job. Right now, right now; an honest job if I can find one.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Funeral Songs for Hipsters

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 14 Jan 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Our most morose playlist yet!

A survey released a few years ago revealed Europeans’ unsurprisingly maudlin song choices for their funerals. On the list was Robbie Williams (Angels), Bette Midler (Wind Beneath My Wings) (ugh), and Elton John (Candle in the Wind). Gross! I want my funeral to be fresh. Before I wrote this playlist, I realized something: If I were to die tomorrow, people would probably look at this list. So, no joking around! These are the actual songs I would like played at my funeral.

Because – The Beatles

This song drifts through your consciousness in an unobtrusive way while letting you ponder the niceties of life. The harmonies in this song are often lauded by critics as one of the best harmonies The Beatles ever performed. It’s a gorgeous song.

Best lyric: Because the sky is blue, it makes me cry

Blankest Year – Nada Surf

Lots of people say, “I want my funeral to be a party.” Well, then, they should play this song. It even has the word “party” in it.

Best lyric: Oh, f*ck it, I’m gonna have a party

No Need to Argue – The Cranberries

For my selfish desire to be lovingly mourned by thousands of saddened onlookers, I choose this woeful song. Oh, how they’ll weep and moan. She was such a good soul, they’ll think. Or at least the organs will distract them from all the hot men that will inevitably attend the service.

Best lyric: There’s no need to argue anymore

Polyphonic Spree – Lithium (Nirvana cover)

How could I plan my funeral playlist and not include a Nirvana tune? Of course, Jesus Doesn’t Want Me for a Sunbeam might be a more appropriate choice, but this song is powerful and interesting with the touches the Polyphonic Spree added. And if my funeral can’t be incredibly gloomy, it should at least be interesting.

Best lyrics: I’m not scared / Light my candles / In a daze / ‘Cause I've found God

Comin’ Home – City and Colour

I’m not religious, but I like the idea of this maudlin song marking my ascent to heaven.

Best lyric: I’m comin’ home

Do You Realize?? – Flaming Lips

This is quite the life-affirming song. I think, out of all the songs I would have at my funeral/fiesta, I’d want this song played. Of course we’re all going to die, why not make the best of it?

Best lyrics: Instead of saying all of your goodbyes / Let them know you realize that life goes fast

That’s Life – Frank Sinatra

This is one of my favourite songs and of course Sinatra always says it best. But it illustrates the ups and downs of life. I’m all about the reality at my funeral. No doe-eyed interpretations of life.

Best lyrics: I don't let it, let it get me down / 'Cause this fine ol' world it keeps spinning around

Perfect Day – Antony and the Johnsons (Lou Reed cover)

This take on Lou Reed’s classic might be the most fitting song on the list for a funeral. A church choir could master this song. It’s transient and gorgeous. If you’re not dead, you should take a listen.

Best lyrics: I thought I was someone else / Someone good

Black Metallic – Catherine Wheel

This song feels supernatural and powerful and it was the only Catherine Wheel song to top U.S. charts. It comes with an added bonus of dramatic rock riffs and a swelling crescendo guaranteed to make my older family members cover their ears.

Best lyrics: I think of you when you're sleeping / Of all the secrets that you're keeping

I’m Only Sleeping – The Beatles

This is what you tell the kids when you don’t want to explain what death is. Also, it brings to light what might be my favourite activity: sleeping.

Best lyrics: Please don’t spoil my day, I’m miles away / After all, I’m only sleeping

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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Drive, She Said

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 14:00:00 GMT

The Best Road-Trip Songs

Driving just isn’t the same without music. Whether you go old school with the radio or are riding the technology wave with an iPod, a driving soundtrack is as essential as a trusty set of brakes. Starting slow then gearing up for full-throttle highway action—buckle up and listen to this musical journey.

Let’s Get Out of This Country – Camera Obscura
To get your engine warmed up, let’s head out of the garage with a sweet tune from some lovely Scots. A car ride signals freedom wherever you may go: to the supermarket or somewhere more exotic. The open road is yours!

Best lyric: Let’s hit the road dear friend of mine / Wave goodbye to our thankless jobs / We’ll drive for miles maybe never turn off / We’ll find a cathedral city; you can be handsome, I’ll be pretty.

Driving Away from Home – It’s Immaterial
A long-forgotten British band, their driving tour of northern England is spot on. The imagery of your home shrinking in the rear-view mirror as you trade the mundane for on-the-road excitement—perfect!

Best lyric: Driving away from home, thirty miles or more. And we’ll go moving away from home without a care in the world.

Behind the Wheel – Depeche Mode
The Mode has the knack for stirring sexual tension into pretty much every song in their repertoire. This one’s not really about driving per se, but the insistent beat and the driving analogy is irresistible just the same.

Best lyric: Sweet little girl / I prefer you behind the wheel and me the passenger / Drive

Born to Be Wild – Steppenwolf
This song is actually referring to motorcycles but it’s just so rockin’ powerful that it makes a great track, regardless of your mode of transport. Blast it windows down out on the highway. And it’s CanCon: ideal for a journey along the Trans-Canada Highway.

Best lyric: Get your motor running / Head out on the highway / Lookin' for adventure in whatever comes our way

Singin’ In the Rain – Mint Royale
Used in the U.K. as the soundtrack to an ultra-popular Volkswagen commercial, this tune samples Gene Kelly’s classic musical. Ideal for highway driving, just watch out for speed traps!

Best lyric: [various samples from Gene Kelly’s “Singin’ in the Rain”.]

To really enjoy this song, watch the video on You Tube.

This Boy – Franz Ferdinand
Now that we’ve opened up the engine on the highway, the time is right for this hyperactive album track by Glasgow’s finest. Fuelled by the repetitive request for a flash vehicle, you’ll have that pedal to the metal in no time.

Best lyric: This boy is so spectacular / Not a boy, but a wealthy bachelor / I want a car, I want a car / I want a car, I want a car, yeah!

Ready, Steady, Go – Paul Oakenfold
Here’s another adrenaline-charged song that was featured in numerous commercials and movie soundtracks. Its popularity speaks to how sensational it is! I dare you to climb behind the wheel and not go over the speed limit.

Best lyric: [various samples]

Watch the video on You Tube.

Car Song – Elastica
Sex and cars. Seems that Elastica and Depeche Mode have something in common. This song’s slower tempo is ideal for exiting the speed of the highway and returning to calmer in-town driving. Just don’t get too distracted by Justine’s backseat romp!

Best lyric: You could call me a car lover / 'Cos I love it in a motor, And the way it feels, To ride around on new wheels / I hardly know you, But I think I'm going to / Let's go siesta, in your Ford Fiesta

Little Red Corvette – Prince
Remember back in the day when Prince was risqué? It’s time for a joyride down memory lane. Take this smash out for a spin and do your best to concentrate on the road.

Best lyric: Little red corvette, Baby you’re much 2 fast / Little red corvette, U need a love that’s gonna last

Drive My Car – The Beatles
Wrapping up the driving tour with no fender benders, this Fab Four classic will get you safely back to your starting point.

Best lyric: Baby, you can drive my car / Honey’s gonna be a star / Baby, you can drive my car / Baby, I love you

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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Get Mad!

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 22 Oct 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Here’s your excuse to mosh

Why are boys so good at aggression? I think it might have something to do with society forcing them to suppress all those tears. Think about it: how angry would you be if you hadn’t been allowed to cry after that awful haircut? Or after Daniel Lewis didn’t ask you to dance in seventh grade (hold on, I’m verklempt, okay)? Pret-ty peeved. But girls can get angry, too. One of my favourite things to do when I’m angry is rock it up with these (mostly) testosterone-charged songs. So turn up the stereo and scrreeaaam.

My Own Summer (Shove It) – Deftones
This song is the epitome of late 90s rock. It starts off all dark and quiet and then, of course, in the middle, they just start yelling. It’s also really eerie and by the time you get to the middle of the song, you’re seriously screaming and headbanging.

Best lyric: SHOVE IT!

Break Stuff – Limp Bizkit
This is definitely my standby song for a bad day. I can thrash about and rarrrr and flail around my living room (or, let’s be honest, my office rolley chair) and just let loose. Wanting to break stuff is definitely a raw emotion and singing about it is definitely better than actually doing it.

Best lyric: Your best bet is stay away motherf***r / it’s just one of those days

Caught out There – Kelis
Kelis is like “I break, so this is how it goes” and then “I HATE YOU! SO MUCH! RIGHT NOW! AHHH.” And you’re like, I feel your pain Kelis. I hate that person too!

Best lyric: [See above]

One Step Closer – Linkin Park
Ahh, a good yell fest. This old tune is more effective for getting anger out than their latest hit, Bleed it Out (which is catchy nonetheless). Put this on and thrust your head about. You’ll feel better, I promise.

Best lyrics: SHUT UP WHEN I’M TALKING TO YOU!

I Hate Everything About You – Three Days Grace
I guess this is the 21st-century version of that Ugly Kid Joe song. Remember when your hormones took over your whole body and you hated the way your mom chewed her steak? I’m so disappointed in you, Dad!

Best lyrics: I hate everything about you / Why do I love you?

Ring the Alarm – Beyonce
Aside from being a good song to listen to when you’re angry, this is an excellent song for the gym. I can do three full minutes of abs to this song purely based on my anger towards various people. What a practical way to express your ill will.

Best lyrics: People told me 'bout the flames / I couldn't see through the smoke / When I need answers, accusations

Try Honesty – Billy Talent
Oh gosh! Here’s another song about being angry at mom and dad. I love those! Sometimes you just have to relive those awful teenage years.

Best lyrics: Forgive me father, why should you bother? TRY HONESTY!

The One – Foo Fighters
This difficult-to-find Foos tune is one of my favourites from that band. And, by hard to find, I mean that it wasn’t in the iTunes store. It took me a long time to locate this song, which is on the Orange County soundtrack. It’s good for when you’re mad at your boyfriend even though you know you’ll never marry him anyway. I’m not going to lie. It’s kinda like their latest song, The Pretender. But better.

Best lyrics: You’re not the one, but you’re the only one that can make me feel like sh*t

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Fefe Dobson’s Picks

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 13:00:00 GMT

What Fefe’s listening to

Hard rockin’ hottie Fefe Dobson is hard at work on her next album. After parting ways with her last label, she’s working independently for now, so hit up her MySpace page for the latest in all things Fefe. She promises that her next effort will be fun, liberating, and “the album that’s gonna let me go to heaven.”

Touch Me – The Doors
I’m guessing that Fefe imagines that Jim is singing to her. Fefe says, “I’m a huge Doors fan. I’m in love with Jim Morrison. I’d marry him if he were alive.”

Best lyrics: I’m gonna love you, till the heavens stop the rain

Like a Boy – Ciara
A favourite of the slice.ca music team, this video calls out dudes on all their nonsense. Fefe likes the song as well as the incredible video.

Best lyrics: Why you gettin’ mad, what you mad, can’t handle that?

I Don’t Love You – Chemical Romance
This melodic declaration of love lost is quite moving, especially if you’re on the verge of dumping someone. “It’s a very cool band,” Fefe says. “This single convinced me to love the second album.”

Best lyrics: I don’t love you like I loved you yesterday

Today – Smashing Pumpkins
This great song has appeared in another Playlist as well: our Virgin Festival coverage. Fefe loves the video and the legendary rock outfit led by Corgan the hairless wonder. “I’m a big grunge fan,” Fefe professes.

Best lyrics: I’ve tried so hard to cleanse these regrets

Dive – Nirvana
This from Incesticide further displays Fefe’s grunge leanings. Incesticide, which came out in 1992 after the initial insanity that came with Nevermind, was less accessible than the radio-friendlier Smells Like Teen Spirit. “It’s not the most obvious choice,” Fefe tells me. But it definitely reflects Fefe’s dedication as a Nirvana fan.

Best lyrics: Pick me, pick me, yeah, everyone is waiting

Malibu – Hole
One of Hole’s bigger successes, this single about Kurt Cobain’s time in rehab was released in 1998 and subsequently nominated for a Grammy. The song was co-written by the aforementioned hairless wonder.

Best lyrics: I knew love would tear you apart

Smooth Criminal – Michael Jackson
This oft-eclipsed hit from 1987’s Bad album was most recently covered by the band Alien Ant Farm. This might have been the case of the onesies, more of a blow to that band since their one hit was a Michael Jackson song.

Best lyrics: He left bloodstains on the carpet

Iris – Goo Goo Dolls
This sweet song is cited by another young Canadian artist as her favourite song and was used as said superstar’s wedding song. But it’s not a difficult song to love and this easy-on-the-ears tune is a great way to wrap up the list.

Best lyrics: I don’t want the world to see me, ‘cause I don’t think that they’d understand

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Modelling Playlist

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Throw on some heels and walk around your basement like you mean it!

I’m Too Sexy – Right Said Fred
You have to wonder if the masterminds behind this song were being serious when they wrote this. I kind of think they were. The important thing is that you believe you’re too sexy. If this seems like an obvious choice… well, you’ve got me there.

Best lyrics: On the catwalk, yeah / I shake my little tush on the catwalk

Drop It Like It’s Hot – Snoop Dogg (feat. Pharrell)
For some reason, this song evokes memories of Tyra Banks. Probably because she dances around to it and the Victoria Secret fashion show did an homage to her with this song. When I die, I hope this is the song they use for my homage.

Best lyrics: [sound of tongue clicks]

Freedom 90 – George Michael
The video for this song confirms two things: George Michael has several supermodel friends and said supermodels lounge around the house half naked looking beautiful, enjoying the musical stylings of their rockstar friends.

Best lyrics: I went back home got a brand new face / For the boys on MTV

Supermodel (You Better Work) – RuPaul
Well, I suppose this is an obvious choice, but how could I not include this modelling classic? This has one of the most important components of a modelling tune: we learn about how hard modelling is. It’s WORK!

Best lyrics: It don’t matter what you do / ‘Cause everything looks good on you

I’ve Been Thinking – Handsome Boy Modeling School (feat. Cat Power)
Modelling doesn’t always have to be upbeat. In fact, sometimes when you’re doing a shoot and you have to look really sad, you need to get in the mood. But you still want something for your kind (i.e., models). That’s why Handsome Boy Modeling School made this song. Enjoy and be melancholic.

Best lyrics: Diamonds, candy pills / One million dollar bills / You can try / But you can't buy me

The Model – Kraftwerk (alternate title: “Das Model” featuring German lyrics)
Who doesn’t love a little German retro new wave techno? Jerks. That’s why we’re featuring this 1978 single—because you are not a jerk. The legendary Kraftwerk from Dusseldorf shaped music as we know it. Not to mention, you can impress your mom’s friends (and Iman, if you ever meet her) with your vast musical knowledge. How cosmopolitan of you!

Best lyrics: She’s posing for consumer products now and then / For every camera she gives the best she can

You’re So Vain – Carly Simon
This one’s for the male models out there. Let’s call a spade a spade. You’ve got to be a little more than concerned with the way you look if you’re going to do a little turn on the catwalk. This song, which will also impress your parents if you know about it, was a hit in 1972 with Mick Jagger singing the backups uncredited. The Mountain Goats cover brings it into the 21st century, though it’s painfully unsatisfying because they leave out the chorus. Also check out the Nine Inch Nails variation on the theme, Starfuckers, Inc.

Best lyrics: You’re so vain, I bet you think this song is about you / Don’t you? Don’t you?

I’m Afraid of Americans – David Bowie
Well, you knew we’d need a song by a crazy rockstar married to a supermodel. Models like us are obviously drawn to hot creative musicians. After marrying Iman in 1992, he started making more electronic beats. Coincidence? Probably.

Best lyrics: God is an American

We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful – Morrissey
There’s a depressing Morrissey song for every occasion and modelling is no exception. One of the more upbeat Morrissey songs, this one details the selfish pain we experience when our friends do something awesome, like become a supermodel. I bet Cindy Crawford’s friends ALL listened to this one in the early nineties. Though this song got some terrible reviews, the idea behind the song is pretty good.

Best lyrics: It should’ve been me

Vogue – Madonna
Come on, move to the music! Of course, this list wouldn’t be complete without this Madonna classic. Ah, the song that shot to the number-one spot in 1990 and maintains its fame to this day. How could you not love it?

Best lyrics: Beauty’s where you find it, not just where you bump and grind it

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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Ben Folds’ Picks

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 13:00:00 GMT

What Ben’s listening to

Piano impresario Ben Folds sat down with us and schooled us on what he’s listening to these days. “I don’t stay current for the sake of staying current,” he says, “the best songs, old and new, develop. They take a motif and make it soar.”

The Hardest Way to Make an Easy Living – The Streets

“The album is great and the song is great,” says Ben. “Mike Skinner is one of the best lyricists going right now. He takes an idea and develops it.” If you want to hear a comparable Ben Folds song, check out “One Down.”

Best lyrics: If this keeps going so well, that’s gonna be the end of us

Do You Realize?? – The Flaming Lips

The transient tones of this song make it floaty and bright at the same time. “The Flaming Lips is one of my favourites to watch,” Ben says.

Best lyrics: You realize the sun don’t go down, it’s just an illusion of the world spinning ‘round

The Devil Is a Liar – Nancy Winter Band

I’m not going to lie. I’m pretty sure Ben Folds is screwing with me. It’s some crazy Christian rock band talkin’ about Jesus. There’s some psychedelic electric guitar in it, so who knows? I suggest you look it up immediately. Then go listen to “Jesusland.”

Best lyrics: If the devil tells you there is no God, just remind him that he’s a liar

Roscoe – Midlake

Midlake made a splash with critics last year when their sophomore effort, “The Trials of Van Occupanther,” came out. “There’s something amorphous about the lyrics on that record,” Ben says. “It’s a fascinating record, the sound is amazing. There’s a distinct feel to it.”

Best lyrics: Whenever I was a child I wondered what if my name had changed into something more productive like Roscoe

Sex Changes – The Dresden Dolls

“Yes, Virginia… is a great record,” Ben tells us. The commanding duo narrates powerful stories with their second album. Amanda Palmer’s throaty voice on this energetic song makes for a powerful and moving listen.

Best lyrics: They always said that sex would change you

Pump it Up - Elvis Costello

Definitely a classic, “Pump It Up” will get you up out of your chair and dancing. “Elvis Costello has great success with being able to develop a song,” Ben says. The song was released in 1978 on the album This Year’s Model.

Best lyrics: She's like a chemical / Though you try to stop it / she's like a narcotic

F*ck and Run – Liz Phair

You can definitely hear the grunge influence in Liz Phair’s earlier albums and that’s what makes her seemingly girly topic matter work so well. The grittiness suits the song to a tee.

Best lyrics: You got up out of bed / You said you had a lot of work to do / But I heard the rest in your head

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

60s Lounge

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Austin Powers Approved

We make fun of his awful teeth and cheesy catch phrases, but Austin Powers is a cool cat where his musical tastes were concerned. 1960s lounge lizard tunes are timeless, the perfect party pleasers. Here’s a sampling of hits from the most swinging of decades sprinkled with some contemporary gems that evoke a similar vibe.

St. Tropez – Brigitte Bardot
Sexy Brigitte personifies the steamy sixties with this tropical tune. Girly and breathy, it’s practically devoid of any meaningful lyrics but that’s what makes it top-most of the 60s heap! Its “la la la la las” are chock full of frolicking fun. If ever there was an invite for some Austin Powers-approved merry making, this one is it.

Goodness Gracious Me – Peter Sellers & Sophia Loren
Take comic genius Peter Sellers and steamy Italian sexpot Sophia Loren. Put them together and, audibly, it works! The result is a cheeky tune that last appeared on the movie soundtrack for Scandal. Albeit slightly politically incorrect, this saucy selection stars Sophia as a patient and Peter Sellers as her MD. Queue silly banter as these two play doctor. Perfectly naughty! As Austin would say, “Oh, behave!”

Best lyric: Her: Oh doctor, I'm in trouble. Him: Well, goodness gracious me. Her: For every time a certain man, Is standing next to me. A flush comes to my face, and my pulse begins to race, It goes boom boody-boom boody-boom boody-boom.

The Beat Goes On – The Buddy Rich Band
Some prefer the Sonny & Cher version, but this rendition performed by Buddy Rich’s pre-teen daughter takes the cake. It’s amazing to hear how this young gal pulls off the song’s vibe. A remixed version was featured during the amorous romp between Jude Law and Susan Sarandon in the remake of Alfie. Jude-approved, says it all!

Best lyric: Charleston was once the rage, uh huh. History has turned the page, uh huh. The miniskirt's the current thing, uh huh. Teenybopper is our newborn king, uh huh. And the beat goes on, the beat goes on.

Becoming More Like Alfie – The Divine Comedy
This mid-90s UK hit sounds like it stepped right out of swinging 60s London. Using the famous Michael Caine film for inspiration, this catchy tune captures the lust-driven pursuits of a randy dandy about town.

Best lyric: Everybody knows that no means yes. Just like glasses come free on the N.H.S. But the more I look through them the more I see I’m becoming more like Alfie.

The Look of Love – Dusty Springfield
This Burt Bacharach-penned classic has been covered by practically everyone. By far the most seductive version is by Dusty Springfield, the grand dame of the British recording industry. Unfortunately, the producers of the Austin Powers soundtracks used former Bangle, Susanna Hoffs’ version and it just cannot compete. For the full effect, always select the finest. Dusty’s coquettish and full of yearning. Susanna is too nasal and does that weird blinking thing with her eyes—definitely not come-hither!

Best lyric: I can hardly wait to hold you, Feel my arms around you. How long I have waited, waited just to love you now that I have found you.

Somebody Somewhere – Moloko
Another contemporary song that owes its fab-ness to another decade, this flirty duet is a musical dance of infatuation and curiosity. Try this tasty “he said, she said” performance that’s ideal for swinging singletons of any age or era.

Best lyric: Sweet child learn to relax. It’s already decided. Sit back don’t tamper with fate. Our stars have collided. Would you dance with me baby. The party is swinging. Don’t just whistle the tune, when you should be singing.

Koocachoo – Kylie Minogue
Smiley Kylie may be a staple of today’s music scene, but with a catchy sing-along such as this one, she would feel right at home in the decade of the Beatles and Mary Quaint. Only Kylie could so effervescently name check go-go dancing as a come-on.

Best lyric: No one else l know can thrill me like you do. I only ever want to go-go dance with you.
You're the dream boy of my bedroom poster. Now we're on a roller coaster ride. You're the greatest gift that l could ever wish for, and there's not a single thing l wouldn't give for a little time with you, my Koocachoo 'cause l'm so in love with you.

Love Is a Gamble – Jackie Lee
This bouncy ode is the real deal. A one-hit wonder from the sixties with yet another bubbly Brit chick on vocals. Fun and carefree, this song exudes the pure bliss of a new crush. Happy-go-lucky in love!

Best lyric: Love is a gamble a man and a woman must take. Love is a gamble a candle that blows in the wind. All that I have I throw on the table for you.

The Other Side of Love – The Caravelles
On the other side of the coin, here’s a high-energy sixties stomper about love gone wrong. Love rats like Austin Powers have a lot to answer for. Think about it: without ex’s to stew over, many excellent songs would never have been written!

Best lyric: There's another side of love, and I’ve been through it all before. I've seen the other side of love and I don't want to see it anymore.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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A Playlist to Indulge By

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Dieters Need Not Apply!

Chocolate, salty snacks, ice cream…life would be so boringly healthy without them. Where would we turn in times of crisis without the big three? Here’s a buffet of songs to tempt your taste buds and keep you coming back for second helpings!

Chocolate – Kylie Minogue
Sweet Kylie serves up a song of love redemption! Alas, she’s been enveloped by a boy with candy kisses and a warm embrace! Ah! In lieu of such a find, may I suggest some imported Cadburys for your sticky pleasure!
Best lyric: Melt me slowly down, Like chocolate, Tastes so good.

Sweet Shop Avengerz – Bis
Most gals can appreciate the effervescence of this kooky ‘90s troop from the UK. What’s not to like? They have a very healthy obsession with all things sickly sweet and bad for your thighs. Play this tune the next time you’re wallowing in full-on break-up mode, elbow-deep in a box of decadent treats!
Best lyric: We’ve had sugar to eat, don’t try and stop me.

Lollipop – Mika
Mika’s snap-tastic ditty is chock-full of sweet melody and yummy lyrics that the Jackson 5 would be proud of. Guaranteed to leave a satisfying aftertaste. Eat it up!
Best lyric: Sucking too hard on your lollipop, oh love’s gonna get you down.

Def-Con One – Pop Will Eat Itself
Basically, this song is just a big pile of nonsense but it’s got this fab, junk food chorus that makes one yearn for this cholesterol-filled cheap thrill!
Best lyric: Big Mac, fries to go. Gimme Big Mac, fries to go…

The Candy Man – Sammy Davis Jr.
The Candy Man, aka, Mr. Right. I’m buying what he’s selling!
Best lyric: The Candy Man makes everything he bakes, satisfying and delicious. Talk about your childhood wishes, you can even eat the dishes.

Ice Cream – Sarah McLachlan
Sarah’s dreamily singing that her partner’s love is better than ice cream. What, is she crazy? Quick, Sarah needs a date with Ben & Jerry!
Best lyric: Your love is better than ice cream. Better than anything else that I’ve tried.

Popcorn – Hot Buttered
An old school fave of the ‘70s K-Tel collection! Surprisingly, this instrumental was the big living room dance floor hit at a house party I went to. Never underestimate your friends when they’re drunk or jacked up on sugar.
Best lyric: [Make up your own to this jumpy tune!]

Chocolate Cake – Crowded House
Unfortunately, this bite-sized offering isn’t really about chocolate cake. Shame, really. The mere mention of chocolate cake is enough to make you think of nothing else. What’s the song about again?
Best lyric: Can I have another piece of chocolate cake?

Sugar, Sugar – The Archies
The song that married “bubblegum” with “pop,” you couldn’t ask for a more sugary concoction! A cotton candy fluff ball of a tune sung by a fictional cartoon band! Not for diabetics or those with A.D.D.
Best lyric: Sugar, ah honey, honey. You are my candy girl. And you've got me wanting you.

I Want to Eat Choco Bars – Shonen Knife
Okay, my secret is out. Enough said. Here’s the English translation. See what I mean? Fab-u-lous!
Best lyric: I like chocobars. Any kind of chocobars. I eat chocobars. Every day two bars per day.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Name Game

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Name the fastest method to climb into the charts? Invest in the proven brand of an already famous celebrity! If they’re dead—even better! Sure, there are tons of songs out there with plain names, but by enlisting the celeb factor, you’re practically guaranteed success and millions in the bank!

Grace Kelly – Mika
Freddie Mercury is alive! Take a listen to this tune and tell me he isn’t! Brit boy du jour, Mika is the real deal. This song may have name checked Grace Kelly but the mere mention of Freddie in the chorus is just too close for comfort.
Best lyric: I try to be like Grace Kelly. But all her looks were too sad. So I try a little Freddie. I’ve gone identity mad!

Clint Eastwood – Gorillas
The legend of the silver screen doesn’t tally a mention in this debut hit for Damon Albarn’s side project from Blur. Just like the artist, Clint’s too cool for school—just having his name in the title is swell enough!
Best lyric: I ain't happy, I'm feeling glad. I got sunshine, in a bag. I'm useless, but not for long. The future is coming on.

Edie (Ciao Baby) – The Cult
Long before Sienna Miller and every other trend-chaser climbed on the Edie Sedgwick bandwagon, UK gloomsters The Cult had already been there and bought the T-shirt. Not that anyone really remembers…this one failed to light up the charts, but chalk that up to poor timing…and no waif-ish Edie wannabes skulking about.
Best lyric: Warhol's darling queen, Edie. An angel with a broken wing.

Andy Warhol – David Bowie
It’s one pop culture icon singing about another. Just how incestuous can you get? That’s one question best unanswered!
Best lyric: Andy Warhol looks a scream. Hang him on my wall. Andy Warhol, Silver Screen. Can't tell them apart at all.

Brian Wilson – Barenaked Ladies
Canadian faves, BNL deliver a scream of a tale about this beached boy. It’s an entertaining song and a pop culture lesson all in one!
Best lyric: Lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did. Well I'm lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did.

Buddy Holly – Weezer
The video for this song actually got more play than the actual song. Best remembered for its Happy Days set complete with Arnold’s Drive-in diner, the tune actually is worthy on its own merits. Geek chic was fueled as a result of this song with specs à la Buddy Holly returning to fashion once again.
Best lyrics: Woo-ee-oo, I look just like Buddy Holly. Oh oh and you're Mary Tyler Moore. I don't care what they say about us anyway. I don't care 'bout that.

James Dean – Daniel Bedingfield
Big bro of Natasha “Unwritten” Bedingfield, Daniel attempts to garner some public adoration for himself. Did it work? Well, he is big in some remote parts of Britain…
Best lyric: I could be James Dean of the Music scene. I could be a big star like that man called Queen. I could have fly moves, be a dance floor dream.

She’s Madonna – Robbie Williams
Rumour has it that this song was based upon a chat Robbie had with Guy Ritchie. Then again, with all the problems Rob has had, the last thing he needs is a thumping from Mr. Madge! Rob, I think that I’d be quiet about the inspiration for this one!
Best lyric: I love you baby. But face it, she's Madonna. No man on earth would say that he don't want her.

Marshall Mathers – Eminem
Hmmm, it’s a bit conceited to compose and record a song featuring your own real name. Eminem obviously doesn’t have self-esteem issues. How boring is that?
Best lyric: You see, I'm just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers). I'm just a regular guy, I don't know why all the fuss about me (fuss about me).

Robert De Niro’s Waiting – Bananarama
Before the Spice Girls and the Sugababes, there was Bananarama. Kooky and fun, most of us wanted to be one of them. This song proved to not only be a hit in the charts but a hit with the actor as well! He met with the girls because of it!
Best lyric: A walk in the park can become a bad dream. People are staring and following me. This is my only escape from it all, watching a film or a face on the wall. Robert de Niro's waiting talking Italian.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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Virgin Festival 2007 Playlist

Robotic Hottie — Mon, 17 Sep 2007 13:03:00 GMT

M.I.A. wows the crowd with her awesome beats, photo by Natalie Gooding

The Virgin Fest, a two-day musical extravaganza that hit the Toronto Island in September of this year, was the bomb diggity. With power pop and rock bands you’ve loved for years, bands you’ve never heard of and a darned good food selection, you’re probably sorry if you missed it. Worry not, with the success of the last two years of V-festin’, you’re probably good for next year. While you’re waiting, check these tracks out.

Today – Smashing Pumpkins

Though the Pumpkins played a lot of new stuff, you can always count on knowing their old ish. And you can’t argue with the classics. Today was the encore and old baldy didn’t disappoint with this old but awesome standby.

Best lyrics: Today is the greatest / Day I have ever known / Can’t wait for tomorrow / I might not have that long

I Bet You Look Good on the Dance Floor – Arctic Monkeys

The Arctic Monkeys are a personal favourite, so please forgive me if I rave a little. This band, coming out of Britain a few years ago via the interweb, puts on a marvelous show every time I see them and V-fest was no exception. Despite their age and rumours that they’re a bit ***-ish, they remain one of my favourite bands to see live. They definitely outshined the headliners this year. And for a surefire go-to crowd-pleaser, I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor is definitely a reliable old friend. If you’re into pop, look for a surprisingly good cover of this song by Sugababes.

Best lyrics: Dirty dancefloors and dreams of naughtiness

Monster Hospital – Metric

Metric did a great job of revving up the audience on the second day of V-fest. Emily rocked out with her… frock out? Either way, I was doubly impressed by the ladies of V-fest. Check out this great track and for a different version, check the MSTRKRFT remix.

Best lyrics: I fought the war, but the war won / Stop, for the love of God

I Miss You – Bjork

Oh, Bjork, you lovely little faerie woman dancing about to sounds and noises that somehow translate into music! Even when she says “thank you,” it’s adorable. Bjork fans were in no way disappointed at V-fest with the amazing show she put on, complete with dramatic costumes and lasers. This song, an ode to a love not yet met, is one of my personal Bjork faves and I was glad that she incorporated it into her set.

Best lyrics: I'm so impatient / I can't stand the wait / When will I get my cuddle? / Who are you?

Your Ex-Lover is Dead – Stars

Stars left the best for last and played their most popular song, Your Ex-Lover is Dead. The performance sent tingles down my spine. Stars definitely engaged the audience, poking fun at Scarborough (my hometown, a suburb of Toronto – brrrup!) and Richard Branson. Their showmanship was definitely great, along with this song. If you haven’t already heard it (where have you been?), go to the store and buy it immediately. Why are you still here? GO!

Best lyrics: I'm not sorry I met you / I'm not sorry it's over / I’m not sorry there’s nothing to say

Read My Mind – The Killers

Anyone, Killers fan or not, has to admit that they put on a hell of a show. They’re the kind of band you don’t want to like because they’re too hip or too showy or full of themselves, but all of a sudden, you find yourself singing along. Brandon Flowers is the kind of *** you meet at a party and want to hate, but he’s so hot, you can’t help but hope he’ll find you on Facebook. The Killers wouldn’t allow press in to take photos, which is another reason not to like them, but their performance of this song was flawless. It’s also a great song and damn catchy.

Best lyrics: I don’t shine if you don’t shine.

No I in Threesome – Interpol

Firstly, all we needed to write here was the title of the song. Secondly, Interpol is surprisingly chill live. You’d think they’d rock out a bit more, but along with strong bass lines and masculine but melodic vocals, the laid back songs suit them. This one in particular was great. It’s definitely boy music, so check them out if they come to town. Apparently, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel if you’re in the market for a dude.

Best lyrics: See song title.

Paper Planes – M.I.A.

As my partner in crime put it, this track is sick. M.I.A. (pictured above) uses gunshots as beats and it completely works. She’s basically the hot new thing and her performance at V-fest was a highlight for everyone that saw it. Check out the Diplo mix of this song for extra inspiration.

Best lyrics: All I wanna do is (gunshots) and take your money

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Shop Till You Drop

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 17 Sep 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Pop these tunes on your iPod before heading out for a shopping excursion extraordinaire

Shopping is a sport in itself, and just like the upcoming volleyball tournament or marathon, inspiring tunes are required for your training to achieve the utmost results! Invest in these songs for optimum purchasing power! Go forth and spend!

Downtown – Petula Clark
All hail the lovely Petula! A true girls’ girl, she knows that life can sometimes get the best of you. And where else to escape your daily grind but in shops and restaurants – downtown delights on display for YOU! This song feels like a walking, talking Doris Day movie.

Best lyric: You can forget all your troubles / forget all your cares, and go downtown / things will be great when you're downtown / everything's waiting for you.

Don’t Stop Til You Get Enough – Michael Jackson
Obviously, this song wasn’t written about shopping. But sly references to sex can also be used for shopping. (See also: Depeche Mode “Just Can’t Get Enough”) The urgency says “Spree!” Got the dress and the shoes? Don’t put your wallet away yet. Get the jewellery, handbag, and make up, too.

Best lyric: Keep on with the force, don’t stop / Don’t stop til you get enough.

The Time Is Now – Moloko
Sale shopping is an art, but sometimes you must have the nerve to purchase at regular price. For tough times such as these, use this fab stomper of a song as your mantra. No time like the present – especially when it’s a present for you.

Best lyric: Give up yourself unto the moment / The time is now / Give up yourself unto the moment / Let’s make this moment last.

Shopaholic – Bis
Having a compulsive habit never sounded so adorable! Britpop crazies Bis came and went before you could say Club Monaco, but the value of this ditty is priceless for those of us who get a little too much joy out of overstuffing our closets.

Best lyrics: When in doubt she will just get both / She’s a shocking shopaholic / Lots of bags, happy all the time / She’s a shocking shopaholic.

Everything She Wants – Wham!
Guys take note. Feed your gal’s addiction and beware! Don’t feed your gal’s addiction…and beware. Life lessons from George Michael – who’d have thought? At least he was pretty back then.
Best lyric: Some people work for a living / Some people work for fun / Girl, I just work for you.

Material World – Madonna
We can always count on Madonna to be on our side. Material Girl Power at its best! Bless!

Best lyric: Only boys who save their pennies / Make my rainy day ‘cause we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl.

Money, Money, Money – Abba
Smart gals know that money equals shopping. Credit is fun, but it’s a fleeting affair. Play this hit when you’re in distress and need to call upon the money gods for assistance in your time of need.

Best lyric: All the things I could do / If I had a little money, it's a rich man's world.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Friend or Foe?

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 10 Sep 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Your friends will know exactly how you feel when you play these tunes for them

A life without friendship is like a day without chocolate—boring and tasteless. Friendships give us support, plenty of drama, and the feeling of belonging. Sure, they may drive us around the bend at times, but we couldn’t survive without them. Herewith, a playlist to pay tribute to the ups and downs of friendship.

You’re My Best Friend – Queen
Too often we take our bosom buddies for granted. Expressing our gratitude can prove difficult. Take a lesson from Freddie Mercury: you don’t have to use multi-syllable words or compose a flowery message, just get the thought out there! This easy, breezy hit is catchy and guaranteed to make your best friend blush.

Best lyric: Ooh, you're the best friend that I ever had. I've been with you such a long time. You're my sunshine and I want you to know that my feelings are true. I really love you. Oh, you're my best friend.

Friends of Mine – Duran Duran
Friendships can sour just like love relationships. The scars of friends gone wrong can hurt forever. Check out this fab tune from 1981. Duran Duran had their loyalty stomped on and are clearly not taking it well. It’s spiteful and full of vinegar; ideal for when you’ve been wronged by someone who was supposedly a friend.

Best lyric: Friends of mine. They said they were friends of mine. Said they were passing time.
More like a waste of time.

I Lost a Friend – Dubstar
This gorgeous UK band is no longer, but the sweet music that they made while they were together—three albums in all—is still relevant. I lost a friend, indeed! They accompanied me through many memories. If you don’t know Dubstar, time to make a new friendship now!

Best lyric: I lost a friend. I left him somewhere round here. He lives in the faces and streets and the memories of something good. And in the end I won the game but something brings me back here. I’ll never see him except in memory of someone good.

Wait for You – Mint Royale
Phony friends with too-cool-for-school attitude, this addictive song should be young Hollywood’s anthem! You don’t have to be named after a French metropolis to collect fair-weather pals. If your clique only values you for the labels you wear, ditch ‘em and hook up with this band!

Best lyric: Did you find what you came for? With all your stolen thoughts and plastic friends, don’t you want any more? Your life is just a production line calling, texting people all the time. Things move on I need something new. I’ve changed my plans and I won’t wait for you.

Graduation (Friends Forever) – Vitamin C
This overly saccharine song was practically everywhere for a spell. Perfect for The OC obsessed who fondly recall high school memories as their glory days. For those of us who, shall we say, bloomed after high school, it’s easy to cackle in disgust. Get past the cheese, it’s actually quite a sweet little number.

Best lyric: As we go on, we remember. All the times we had together. And as our lives change
Come whatever, we will still be friends forever.

We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful – Morrissey
We can always count on Morrissey to bring out the nasty side of …anything! Go on, admit it. There’s a part of you that hates it when your pal gets that promotion or hooks up with your mutual crush. Competitiveness thrives within friendships. You’re kidding yourself if you think not!

Best lyric: We hate it when our friends become successful. And if they're northern, that makes it even worse. And if we can destroy them…You bet your life we will.

Absent Friends – The Divine Comedy
Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to one of the most underrated bands—ever. Not so much a band but a witty Irish guy called Neil. Just like friends, some bands come and go. For me, this one always stuck. A friendship for life, I say.

Best lyric: Absent friends, here’s to them. In happy days, we thought they would never end. Here’s to absent friends.

Thank You for Being a Friend – Andrew Gold
Much like Queen’s take, this song is a public statement about an amazing friend. As a one-hit wonder, let’s hope that Andrew’s friendship lasted longer than his pop star success!

Best lyric: Thank you for being a friend. Traveled down the road and back again. Your heart is true, you're a pal and a confidant.

With a Little Help from My Friends – The Beatles
Much like a trusty old friendship, the Beatles are always available to soothe the soul and offer worthy insight. The time is always right for some reminiscing with your old pals. They know you better than most…and have the embarrassing photos to prove it!

Best lyric: I get by with a little help from my friends. I get high with a little help from my friends. Going to try with a little help from my friends.

Bookends – Simon and Garfunkel
If you’re lucky enough to keep a treasured friendship alive for decades, then this song’s for you. It’s extremely brief but when the message is this sweet, why waste breath? It’s simply perfect.
For more S & G magic, play “Bridge Over Troubled Water.”

Best lyric: Time it was and what a time it was it was; a time of innocence, a time of confidences.
Long ago it must be, I have a photograph. Preserve your memories; they’re all that’s left you.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Your Metamorphosis

Robotic Hottie — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 12:48:00 GMT

Chill to these songs as you contemplate your fate

One of the most important things to consider during your quest to find the meaning of life, aside from what Nietzsche had to say, is the type of music that you're going to listen to. It’s probably going to be a lonely time. Your friends won’t understand what you’re going on about and your family won’t be of much help either. This is assuming that your loved ones aren’t a band of miscreants who are also undergoing major life shifts. If they are, maybe you can all get together and listen to these songs.

Hurt – Johnny Cash

You can’t go wrong with a Trent Reznor song if you’ve given up looking for the meaning of life. And this song definitely puts across a stalemate. Johnny Cash does a wonderfully sullen cover of this Nine Inch Nails classic on his last major release.

Best lyric: You could have it all / My empire of dirt

Gimme a Little Sign – Brenton Wood

In the lyrics, sub in "universe" for “girl” and you've got yourself a ditty about the meaning of life. If he'd actually said universe, it wouldn't have been a hit, so he said girl.

Best lyric: Just gimme some kind of sign girl

Should I Stay or Should I Go? – The Clash

If you’re thinking about the meaning of life, you’re probably thinking about making some changes. Should you move to Africa? Should you get a dog? Should you marry the wrong person and have his or her babies? Should you quit your job and work at a record label?

Best lyric: One day it’s fine, one day it’s black

Blue Monday – Nouvelle Vague

This upbeat cover of the New Order tune makes sadness feel summery and fresh!

Best lyric: Tell me, how does it feel / When your heart grows cold?

I’m Not Sorry – Morrissey

If Conor Oberst is the modern day poster boy for existential crises, he has to fight Morrissey for the title. There are lots of Morrissey songs to choose from when grappling with the meaning of life, but this song, found on the You Are the Quarry album, is a great option.

Best lyric: I’m not sorry for the things I’ve done… / Existence is only a game

Looking Forward to Looking Back – Mandy Moore

Old snaggletooth had her first existential crisis right after the king of faux existential crises himself, Mister Zach Braff, broke up with her. She was quoted as saying, “Who am I? Where do I fit into the world? What am I doing, what do I want to do? Am I living to my full potential?” Sing it, sister.

Best lyrics: Let it go / Let it go sunshine

Let Go – Frou Frou

Speaking of Braffman, he has a certain talent for choosing soundtrack music. He made this song popular when he featured it on the Garden State soundtrack. Check out this YouTube clip of the Overtones, an a cappella group from California, doing a great cover of the song.

Best lyric: There’s beauty in the breakdown

Waiting – The Devlins

Made famous by the Six Feet Under soundtrack, this song illustrates the utter meaningless of lots of things: the right shoes, fast cars and air miles.

Best lyric: Waiting for the beestings they tell me that success brings

All These Things That I’ve Done – The Killers

A song to resonate with a generation, this is definitely one for mid-twenties set. And why not rock out while you’re contemplating the meaning of life?

Best lyrics: I need direction to perfection / Yeah, you gotta help me out

Everything is Everything – Lauryn Hill

The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill is a great album if you’re looking to examine what’s going on in the world. The album was written in the late 90s, but it’s still relevant. This song is great for navel-gazing.

Best lyrics: After winter must come spring / Change comes eventually

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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Musical Cheese

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 09 Jul 2007 13:00:00 GMT

We need crackers to listen to these tunes

Before settling on the main musical course, sometimes it’s ideal to clean the palate with some musical cheese. This batch of songs is chock full of fromage – caution advised for lactose intolerant listeners.

Lovin’ You – Minnie Riperton

Minnie, mother of Saturday Night Live cast member Maya Rudolph, boasted an incredible 5 octave range that even Christina couldn’t diss. Don’t know this song?…but you DO. That ‘la la la la la’ chorus…the soaring ‘awhhhhhwhwhhh!’ Contrary to pop culture rumours, Ms. Riperton did not die from a brain hemorrhage after reaching one of her seriously high notes. People, please!

Best lyric: Lovin’ you is easy ‘cause you’re beautiful

I’m Not in Love – 10cc

A classic song of mixed messages: I’m not in love, but I have your photo on my wall, but I don’t love you, it’s just there to hide a mess on the wall. Yeah, right! A bit of the “come here, go away, come here, go away” – going on, all delivered with a super tacky female whispering, ‘be quiet, big boys don’t cry’ in the middle. It’s so bad, it’s great.

Best lyrics: I'm not in love, so don't forget it / It's just a silly phase I'm going through

Hello, It’s Me – Todd Rundgren

Well into her teen years, actress Liv Tyler was led to believe that this fellow was her father. Bet she was relieved to learn she could trade one skinny rocker father figure for another! With this tune, Todd’s sinking relationship is gasping for its final breath over a phone conversation. How do you think it went?

Best lyrics: It's important to me / That you know you are free / 'Cause I never want to make you change for me.

Seasons in the Sun – Terry Jacks

CanCon time! Take a bow, Terry Jacks. This mournful death-bed farewell to loved ones prompted tears and ringing cash registers the world over. Heavy stuff, but the public ate it up, making this song one of the largest selling singles in Canadian music history.

Best lyric: It's hard to die when all the birds are singing in the sky

Love Will Keep Us Together – Captain and Tennille

Cheese will always rise to the top. Take this fine piece of 70’s schlock – it’s been resurrected for a recent cell phone ad – and it works! Back in the day, the Capt. and his missus were the toast of the recording industry. Toni Tennille’s mushroom cap hair cut was in vogue and even their lesser known recording ‘Muskrat Love’ hit high in the charts. Thank goodness the music-buying public woke up and discovered good music.

Best lyrics: Don't mess around / You gotta be strong

I’d Really Love to See You Tonight – England Dan and John Ford Coley

Another cheesy gem that received the commercial treatment – this one was used for a margarine TV ad. What does that tell you? Trans-fats, grease…very unhealthy. And what’s with the double-barreled names? This one has one-hit wonder written all over it.

Best lyric: I'm not talking 'bout moving in / and I don't want to change your life / But there's a warm wind blowing, the stars are out, and I'd really love to see you tonight

Torn Between Two Lovers – Mary MacGregor

This chart-topper professes a very polite representation of a cheatin’, lying girl on the town. Two-timing never sounded so sweet or proper. See, nice girls do.

Best lyric: Torn between two lovers / Feelin' like a fool / Lovin' both of you is breakin' all the rules

Don’t Give Up On Us Baby – David Soul

Even in the 70’s, TV stars felt the need to be actors and singers. I think this guy should have concentrated on perfecting his acting first. Perhaps he should have called up TV partner, Starsky to aid in this musical crime. Fans were led to believe that Hutch was showing us his sensitive side. Too bad he ruined the illusion with a b-side called ‘Black Bean Soup’! Sensitive and gassy…the ideal man. (Ed: At least a realistic one.)

Best lyric: Don't give up on us, baby / Don't make the wrong seem right / The future isn't just one night

Alone Again, Naturally – Gilbert O’Sullivan

The crowned prince of cheesy tunes, this saddo was nominated for a Grammy and for the schlockiest song – all in the same year. Perfect for those hidden moments when you want to wallow in self-pity and loneliness. Bet Morrissey likes it, just sayin’.

Best lyric: But as if to knock me down / Reality came around / And without so much as a mere touch / Cut me into little pieces

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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Crushed By Love

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Songs to listen to as you weep the night away

Sure, love can be grand, but many a time it kicks the living daylights out of you. Here’s a batch of musical band aids that will make you feel not so alone.

Grace - Kate Havenik

This songstress is a fave of the ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ post-production crew. “Grace” was featured during the sophomore season’s finale amplifying the scenes between Izzy & Denny. Check out Kate’s album – there’s plenty more where this gem came from.

Best lyrics: Where do I begin? Nothing can bring me peace / I’ve lost everything / I just want to feel your embrace

Missing You – Jem

When the wound is fresh, it’s nearly impossible to see the positive. Turn to Jem when the grief is new and the tears plentiful.

Best lyrics: All the wonderful memories just make me fall apart / And it feels like somebody's stabbed me in my heart

Never Ever – All Saints

We’ve all been there. Been dumped with no clue as to why he left. Take solace in this worldwide hit by All Saints. They may have married rock star husbands, but in their early days, they knew a thing or two about feeling abandoned, confused and unloved.

Best lyrics: I'll keep searching deep within my soul for all the answers / Don't wanna hurt no more

Over and Over – Moloko

Moloko can be kooky, but with this fantastic track from their final album, they prove that they can play the sensitive card. The song’s hero is revisiting her unwanted break up, achingly wishing for her ex to re-establish contact. This track hits where it hurts.

Best lyrics: Some days I question / The suggestion you might not exist at all / Can we meet and talk it over? Would you be kind enough to call? Over and over / It’s over all over

My Immortal - Evanescence

Vocalist Amy Lee delivers a beautiful performance here. Incredibly moving and sad, when you’re ready for a wallow, this song will be waiting for your company.

Best lyrics: These wounds won’t seem to heal / This pain is just too real / There’s just too much that time cannot erase

Missing – Everything But the Girl

Depending on your state of mind, you can either opt for the original version (for more reflective times), or choose the trip-hop remix (for unbridled stalker moments). Regardless, this track is chock full of broken-hearted yearning.

Best lyric: Can I confess / I've been hanging around your old address and years have proved to offer nothing since you moved / You're long gone and I can't move on

I Hope I Never – Split Ends

Known for their fun fuelled poppy extravaganzas, Tim & Neil Finn’s first band was also in touch with their maudlin side. Running into an ex when you’re still raw from the bust-up is never pretty and these guys know the score.

Best lyrics: My urge to cry I have failed to conceal / Life - it's no fun when you’re hunted by the things that you feel

Don’t Forget Me – Way Out West

Have you ever broken up with someone and had to get the last word in? The relationship is dead and buried, but you just felt compelled to leave a parting message? This song was written for you.

Best lyrics: There’s just one thing that I need to feel before I walk away against my will / There’s just one thing that I need to hear before I walk away for the last time / Don't forget me, don't regret me.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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It’s Sweet Revenge!

Sporty Vixen — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Revenge is rampant in this playlist

Let’s face it. Females aren’t all sweetness and light. Sometimes, we like to show our darker, more menacing side. Step into the spotlight, revenge. What raises this underrated trait more often than any other cause? Easy…men. Keep this playlist handy when you need to fight back.

Vow – Garbage

Shirley Manson is the queen of avenging rock chicks. There’s a well-known story about our Shirl and the ‘present’ she left for an ex boyfriend in his cornflakes. No, it wasn’t strawberries! Google it if you don’t know about it. You can’t get nastier than that.

Best lyric: I came around to tear your little world apart and break your soul apart

Karma Killer – Robbie Williams

The Robster’s had instances in his career when revenge was paramount. It’s not everyday that your Manager sues you for all revenue earned under his employ. This tune is perfect for moments when you want to shout to the world about how furious you are. It has the best repeated bit at the end. Therapy on the cheap, I say!

Best lyric: Needless to say, I guess you know I hate you / You're so full of sin / Even the devil rates you

Ciao! – Lush

This Britpop duet with Miki from Lush and incomparable Pulp front-man, Jarvis, is a delightful she said, he said take on the whole ‘you lost out when we split’ scenario. Witty and cutting, it’s the smart girl’s revenge fantasy.

Best lyric: You were nothing but a waste of space and life is wonderful now that I'm over you

You Oughta Know - Alanis Morissette

Few people would dispute this classic’s standing as THE ultimate song of vindictiveness. It’s full of spite and venom…just the way we like ‘em.

Best lyric: Every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back / I hope you feel it / I'm here to remind you, of the mess you left when you went away

Bye Bye Baby – Madonna

Like your neighbourhood gift shop, Madonna’s got a message for every occasion – including revenge. This tune proves that there’s a thin line between love and hate. She’s giving her man the heave-ho while imparting the message – he’s doomed to have had crossed her. I’m not sure what’s worse: being Madge’s spouse or one of her exes.

Best lyric: You had your chances, all your romances. And now I just don't want you. I know I love you because I hate you. And now I'd rather haunt you. Bye bye baby bye bye. It's your turn to cry.

Karma - Alicia Keys

Ultra talented Alicia Keys offers up a more refined payback for the ladies. She’s not throwing down any daunting threats. Instead, she’s reminding a certain someone that karma is alive and well and it’ll hunt you down and whoop you when you least expect it. When you’re feeling more constrained in your retaliatory fantasies, this song’s for you.

Best lyric: Cause what goes around comes around / What goes up must come down / Now who's cryin’ desirin’ to come back to me

Fighter - Christina Aguilera

Xtina takes the grown up path with this tune – actually giving thanks to an unforgivable ex for helping her improve. Ah, if only we could all be adult about these things and learn from bad situations instead of making voodoo dolls and crank phone calls. One day, one day…

Best lyric: Makes me work a little bit harder / It makes me that much wiser / So thanks for making me a fighter

One Way or Another – Blondie

Debbie Harry is the original Slice girl – in control, sassy and smart. Decades later, this song is still irresistible for its crazed, stalker-like quality. Ideal for moments of unparalleled vengeful behaviour!

Best lyric: I'll find out who you call / I'll stand over by the wall where I can see it all / I can read lips from a mile away / You see there is the master plan.

Song for the Dumped – Ben Folds Five

Poor Ben Folds – he’s the perfect guy friend, and that’s just his problem. He got dumped and now he’s fighting for all the dough he forked out to this ungrateful cow of an ex-girlfriend. Use this one to cheer up your best guy pal.

Best lyric: Give me my money back, Give me my money back, you b***h!

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Get Motivated

Scotch Mommy — Fri, 11 May 2007 19:36:00 GMT

Feel good with these songs that inspire

Sure, there are days when you’re angry or down in the proverbial dumps. But one thing is for sure: the right song can always cheer you up. No doubt you have your own playlist of songs to play when things are going wrong. But here are some new additions to check out. Download these babies on a day when you need some motivating.

The Middle – Jimmy Eat World
This is the ultimate inspirational song. It’s like having one of those really cool guy friends who’s cute but you were never into tell you how awesome and sweet you are. I love those guys!

Best lyric: Hey, don’t write yourself off yet / Just do your best, do everything you can

Ooh Child – The Five Stairsteps
Go back to the Motown days and take a listen to a classic. This song has been covered by many, but there is something to be said for the powerful original.

Best lyric: Someday we’ll walk in the rays of the beautiful sun

Things Are Getting Better – N*E*R*D
Count on hip hop to bring you some self-esteem pointers. Pharrell definitely doesn’t have a low opinion in himself and he even goes as far as to say “I’m the sh*t” several times. Over and over. Damn right! You will feel good after listening to this song, or your money back.

Best lyric: Sometimes you gotta realize where you are in your life / In order to feel good

Chicago – Sufjan Stevens
Sufjan is currently the king of the indie world and his music can be admittedly slow and perhaps a little depressing. But this song is definitely a mood-booster. It sort of makes you feel good about being broke and loveless.

Best lyric: All things go / all things grow

Float On – Modest Mouse
Without being corny or cliché, this song is basically the modern version of “Don’t Worry Be Happy.” Despite getting fired, hitting a cop car, being scammed by swarthy ne’er do wells, and general crappiness, we’ll all float on okay.

Best lyric: We both got fired on exactly the same day / Well we'll float on, good news is on the way

What You Waiting For – Gwen Stefani
Not only will this song kick you into gear if you need to be inspired to, say, go to the gym, but it’ll also make you feel like going out into the world and making a few million.

Best lyric: You're still a super hot female!

Young Folks – Peter, Bjorn and John
The up-tempo beat and interesting lyrics make this song a hit with everyone from hipster kids to people who listen to mainstream soundtracks (like the Grey’s Anatomy soundtrack). Displaying the power of the internet, this song shot to popularity after being featured on YouTube. If that’s not inspirational, I dunno what is.

Best lyric: and we don't care about our own faults talkin' 'bout our own style

Parentheses – The Blow
You are gonna love this song. Every time I hear it, I thrust about doing a little dance, no matter if I’m in public or not. It’s a song about friendship and camaraderie. And it was listed in Pitchfork’s top 50 singles last year, so it’s got some indie cred attached to it. You can’t lose.

Best lyric: You’re not a baby if you feel the world / All the babies, they can feel the world / That’s why they cry

Feeling Good – Nina Simone
I might be biased as this is my favourite song of all time, but there’s nothing more inspirational than cranking up this eerie emotional jazz classic. It’s so amazing that’s it’s been covered by Muse, The Eels, Michael Bublé, and many more. Please do not confuse this with Nickelback’s “Feeling So Damn Good.” That would be tragic.

Best lyric: The old world is a new world / and a bold world for me

Suddenly I See – KT Tunstall
KT Tunstall rocked onto the scene a few years ago with her acclaimed album, Eye to the Telescope. This song, as much as it’s been used for a million movie soundtracks, still gives me goosebumps. If you haven’t heard it already, check it out and listen to the rest of the album, too.

Best lyric: Suddenly I see why the hell it means so much to me

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Musician Edition - Aqualung

Robotic Hottie — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 19:16:00 GMT

Matt Hales of Aqualung provides a musical cornucopia for us to feast upon

If you’ve never listened to the musical stylings of Aqualung, now is a good time to start. The down-tempo laid back music is reminiscent of Coldplay, but it definitely takes cues from Radiohead circa 1999. Matt Hales, Aqualung’s creator, says the music deals with “grown up themes” such as “second love, fucked up third love and the awful mistake of fourth love. And ageing and people getting sick and babies and all the amazing stuff that goes on in this part of our lives.” Check out Memory Man, Aqualung’s latest album. It’s worth a listen. Here’s what Matt’s been listening to lately.

Muzzle of Bees – Wilco

“Wilco is one of my current enthusiasms. They’re quite inspiring, particularly on the road. I like to listen to the bands that I really admire because it keeps the bar high. It’s good to have an example of something splendid to try to live up to. It’s like, we could actually do this better, we can try harder.”

From the album: A Ghost is Born, 2004

Just Kissed My Baby – The Meters

“This is, in my opinion, the best piece of music ever recorded in the history of mankind. I’m prepared to stick by that. They’re the greatest funk band ever. And if you haven’t heard it, go find it and bring it into your life. It’s ecstatic, sexy and wonderful.”

From the album: Rejuvenation, 1974

You Haven’t Done Nothing – Stevie Wonder

“This is one of his angry but still funky songs. You have to worship at the altar of Stevie Wonder in the 70s, he was an unbelievable pure genius. One hopes to get anywhere near his level of pure genius.”

From the album: Fulfillingness' First Finale, 1974

Does Everyone Stare – The Police

“I really loved The Police when I was young and then I went off them. I’m still kinda off them but this song, which was written by Stewart Copeland, is excellent and strange. They were mostly quite an odd band apart from the massive hits, which reminds me that strange stuff is good.”

From the album: Reggatta de Blanc, 1979

Dancing Queen – ABBA

“No one really ever describes ABBA as a funk band… and rightly so. There is something irrepressible about the groove in this song. It’s so joyful, it barely makes any sense and it’s one of the most ecstatic pieces of music that I’ve ever heard.”

From the album: Arrival, 1976

Requiem for Benjamin Britten – Arvo Part

“Arvo Part is a contemporary classical musician. This song is just made of waves of descending waves. It is just like the last few minutes of someone’s life, everything just shuts down. You don’t want to listen to this immediately after Dancing Queen because you might smash yourself in half. Listen to it in the middle of the night. It’s inspiring and amazingly moving.”

From the album: A Portrait of Arvo Part, 2005 (Cantus in Memory of Benjamin Britten)

Caroline, No – The Beach Boys

“This is one of my mum’s favourite songs – I think I got my love of melancholy from her. It’s an amazingly heartbroken song about your lost childhood. It’s very pathetic in a beautiful way. We’ve done a few covers from Pet Sounds, it’s a constant for me, that album because I grew up with it. It’s inside me permanently playing.”

From the album: Pet Sounds, 1966

This Woman’s Work – Kate Bush

“[Sensual World] is a really underrated record, it’s her best album. I’ve been wondering about doing a cover of this song. It’s a rare song that discusses a man’s perspective on parenthood, a relatively new parent.

From the album: Sensual World, 1989

Beethoven’s 9th Symphony

“This is a real old-fashioned classic. Beethoven’s the daddy, the beginning of the whole idea that making music could be a heroic undertaking and that there is something slightly superhuman about it (which I can’t help but agree with). This must have been the OK Computer of its day. It must have blown everyone’s heads off. It’s a relatively conventional symphony and then suddenly a choir comes in and you’re like, what the ***? He’s the original rock star.”

Hots On For Nowhere – Led Zeppelin

“In the bus after a show, we have a drink and a chat eventually someone will work up this track. We’ve overturned busses with the assquake that this track generates. The whole bus turned over, flew into space and ended up in the moon covered in our own juice because that’s how good this track is.”

From the album: Presence, 1976

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Musician Edition - Suzie McNeil

Agent Burlesque — Thu, 19 Apr 2007 16:25:00 GMT

Suzie McNeil's Mixed Bag of Beats

Canada’s own Suzie McNeil is finally home; after spending a year in LA after her break out on 2005’s RockStar: INXS, she’s appearing in the Toronto stage production of “We Will Rock You”.

In Suzie’s very own words, here’s what she’s listening to and why. Here’s an inside look at what she’s rockin’ every day.

Metric

“For inspiration”

Our pick: Combat Baby. This song, also by home grown Canadians, rocks – hard.

Mig

“When I’m feeling mellow”

Our pick: She Loved. With a soothing voice and honest lyrics, we dig this track.

Robbie Williams

“When I’m going to work”

Our Pick: Millennium. Ridiculously catchy, and he does make such lovely eye candy. Please tour in Canada Robbie – we luv ya.

Matt Nathanson

“When I’m feeling introspective”

Our Pick: Philadelphia Song. So so so funny, not so much musical, as just plain funny.

Billy Jayne

“When I’m feeling sassy”

Our Pick: A place in the sun. A rocky kinda love song with a catchy lick.

Ben Harper

“When I’m feeling lonely, weepy”

Our Pick: By My Side. Less lonely, more mournful but hopeful.

Beatles

“When I’m singing at the piano”

Our Pick: honestly, can there be just one pick? We’re sure you already have a favourite. Hey Jude would be a pretty good one though if you were hanging out near a piano.

NIN

We will take the liberty of paraphrasing the direct quote, but the idea was “Music to make love by – but in a dirty way”

Our Pick: Animal. That one kind of goes without saying.

Avril Lavigne

“For a strange musical choice”

Our Pick: Sk8er Boi. We think the spelling is pretty strange.

Pink Floyd – Dark Side of the Moon

“Because it’s the best work of art ever created”

Our Pick: Front to back this album is a great concept piece; it should be listened to in its entirety.

Tongue kiss ‘til the morning to these tunes

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 02 Apr 2007 16:50:00 GMT

Best Make-Out Music

Let’s not mince words: Making out is pretty fantastic, isn’t it? You wouldn’t think so—as a kid, I’d hide my eyes when people on television kissed because I couldn’t understand why someone would want to do that. Yet, it’s strangely nice. Good tunes playing in the background is a nice touch to any make-out sesh. Here’s a selection of the best make-out music out there.

Cherry Blossom Girl – Air
To be fair, I can’t make the playlist all Air songs. But I have to say, if you’re looking for full make-out albums, Air has a good selection. This ephemeral music feels like floating, which is always nice when you have your eyes closed.

Best lyrics: I feel sick all day long / From not being with you

Sexy Results – Death From Above 1979
Ah, the inspiration for this list. I love, love, love this song. Whether you’re listening to it for the laughs or you’re actually hoping for some of those results, it’s a great song to groove to.

Best lyrics: Sexy woman take me to the bedroom / Let me show you how I work, work, work, work

Teardrop – Massive Attack
This song, though it came out almost ten years ago in 1998, still sounds contemporary and relevant. The gorgeously composed song comes off like a souped-up hymn.

Best lyrics: Love is a verb / Love is a doing word

Fade Into You – Mazzy Starr
None of the indie covers of this majestic yet delicate song do it justice. The beauty that Hope Sandoval captures with her voice resonates long after the song is over. Of course, since you’ll be busy necking, you won’t notice. (Ha, I said necking!)

Best lyrics: I want to hold the hand inside you / I want to take a breath that’s true

Slow Spanish music
There was a time in my life that I knew a bit of Spanish, aka the week of my final Spanish exam in university. Now, I can’t remember a word. But I do remember watching several Gael Garcia Bernal films and listening to Spanish music to drive the language into my head. And I do remember that anything in Spanish sounds incredibly sexy.

Recommended Spanish ditty (recommended to me by a true Spaniard): Amiga Mía by Alejandro Sans

Make Out Fall Out Make Up – Love Is All
If you’re into a livelier make-out session, then this is a good one to get your blood circulating. This band continually wows critics with their poppy upbeat tunes and this song even has the words “make out” in it. Plus, they’re Swedish, so you know they’re make-out experts.

Best lyrics: Make out, fall out, make up

This Is No Ordinary Love – Sade
Question: Who could resist the smooth sounds of the queen of seduction (and the king of sorrow), Sade? Answer: No one. Nothing’s sexier than Sade! This song is perfect.

Best lyric: There’s nothing like you and I, baby

Wicked Game – Giant Drag
This take on the Chris Isaak classic features a female vocalist with a cutting delivery of the pop classic. Known (by me) as one of the sexiest songs of all time, this song is great to make out to, especially if it’s with someone you have mixed feelings toward.

Best lyric: Ain’t it strange what desire makes foolish people do?

Spin Spin Sugar – Sneaker Pimps
Back in the day, when electronica was the hot new genre, this song was a big hit. And I bet you a bushel of pickles that people everywhere had hot n’ heavy kissfests with this song as the soundtrack.

Best lyrics: Call on me / Spin spin sugar / Crawl on me

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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Music to Party to

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 01:01:00 GMT

Party it up with these rockin tunes

Some of these songs verge on cheesy karaoke song territory (Love Shack, anyone?), but they’re all guaranteed to get you moving. And after all, isn’t that what a good party’s about?

Let’s Get it Started – Black Eyed Peas

No party starts without the Peas’ soulful anthem. With a chantable chorus and a wicked beat that builds up to a towering crescendo, it’ll have you jumping even before you’ve finished your first drink.

Best lyric: Lose control, of body and soul/Don't move too fast, people, just take it slow / Don't get ahead, just jump into it

Groove is in the Heart – Deee-Lite

I’ve always had a softspot for Deee-Lite. Possibly because I had my hair cut in a bob like Lady Miss Kier (Deee-Lite’s lead singer) when this song came out and people used to say I looked like her. I really didn’t, but it was nice to believe I resembled this gorgeous, fire-haired, cartoon-character-like throwback to the 1960s. Bottom line: A dance floor classic.

Best lyric: Your groove I do deeply dig/No walls only the bridge/My supperdish, my succotash wish

Love Shack – B-52’s

With their oddball personalities, 60s bouffant wigs and colorful videos, the B-52’s are a little weird, but that’s why we love them. This song is a perfectly catchy ode to all the fun that can be had movin’ and groovin’ in that “funky little shack.” Plus, if you play it at a wedding, you’re bound to get both the gray hairs and the young ‘uns on the dance floor.

Best lyric: Love Shack baby! Love Shack, that's where it's at/Huggin' and a kissin', dancin' and a lovin', wearin' next to nothing/Cause it's hot as an oven

Lady Marmalade – feat. Christina Aguilera, Mya, Pink, Lil' Kim, Missy Elliot

This one’s especially good if you’re drunk and out with the girls. It’s that struttin-yer-stuff, “soul sistas” thing where you all gang up and dance suggestively in the hopes of attracting intense male attention. And it usually works.

Best lyric: Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir (ce soir)/Voulez vous coucher avec moi (all my sistas yea)

One More Time – Daft Punk

You may have overdosed on this dance classic when it came out, since it was damn-near ubiquitous in the clubs, but it still holds up. With it’s electro beat and so-simple lyrics, it’s an unforgettable club anthem that stays in your head for hours on end. And somehow, that makes for a great feel-good party song.

Best lyric: One more time/We gonna celebrate/Oh yeah, alright/Don't stop dancing

Don't Stop ’Til you Get Enough – Michael Jackson

There’s just something about vintage Michael (think: Off the Wall/Thriller). Maybe it’s the memory of a pre-Wacko Jacko, dressed in a tux, dancing in front of a blue screen made to look like a disco ball. Or maybe it’s a longing for days when you didn’t feel embarrassed dancing to disco. Whatever the case, it’s got a definite disco vibe that’s perfect to cut a rug to.

Best lyric: Keep on with the force don’t stop/Don’t stop ’til you get enough

Hey Ya – Outkast

This ditty’s got it all: A wicked beat, a quirky video, along with an equally quirky lead singer (Andre 3000), and a memorable chorus you can sing along to, even when you’re sauced. I defy you to hear this song and not be tempted to shake it like a Polaroid picture.

Best lyric: Shake it, shake it like a Polaroid Picture, shake it, shake it

Hot in Herre – Nelly

Really want to heat up a dance floor? Throw on this Nelly number with the wickedly catchy Neptunes-produced beats and prepare for the dance floor flirtations and gyrations to begin. It makes the ladies want to take off their clothes, didn’t ya know?

Best lyric: It's gettin hot in herre (so hot), so take off all your clothes/I am gettin so hot, I will take my clothes off

Dirrrty – Christina Aguilera

Christina got a lot of flack when this came out, and granted, she’s not really showing her vocal chops here, so much as how good her ass looks in those chaps. But if you wanna work up a sweat on that dance floor, Dirrty’s a surefire winner. Let the bumping and grinding begin!

Best lyric: Wanna get dirty/It's about time that I came to start the party/Sweat dripping over my body

Holiday – Madonna

How could we not include Madge on this list? Holiday is the ultimate party song: it’s got a catchy disco beat, repeatable chorus in which our icon wails about bringing back all those happy days, and a cheesy slide dance built right in from her early, amateurish days on Top of the Pops. What more could you ask for?

Best lyric: If we took a holiday/Took some time to celebrate/Just one day out of life/
It would be, it would be so nice

Written by: Kristen Vinakmens

Cry, Baby

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 00:29:00 GMT

Cry yourself a river with these songs

Happiness seems to be the goal of most folks, but not every day can be full of sunshine and rainbows. Crying and despair just don’t get their fair due. C’mon, it’s good for us to cry and let it all out. And, sometimes, it’s fun! Embrace your inner drama queen and indulge in this assortment of music for misery.

Nothing Compares 2 U – Sinead O’Connor

Sinead temporarily shakes off the wacko persona and offers up a wallow-worthy song of loneliness and despair. You can almost picture her tucked into her jammies surrounded by used tissues and empty ice cream cartons. Almost!

Best lyric: I said nothing can take away these blues, `Cause nothing compares, nothing compares to you.

Everybody Hurts – REM

Michael Stipe & Co. struck a cord with sad saps the world over with this lovely tune that starts off tenderly, but then builds up to a powerful conclusion. A suicide prevention organization in the UK adopted the lyrics for their ad campaign. Yup, these lyrics are powerful.

Best lyric: 'Cause everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends. Everybody hurts. Don't throw your hand. Oh, no. Don't throw your hand. If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone.

All By Myself – Eric Carmen

Forget that annoying over-the-top version by Celine Dion, this original is the real deal. Written and performed by one-hit wonder Mr. Carmen, this version is all the more desperate and pathetic because it’s sung by a man! Wail away, Eric!

Best lyric: All by myself, Don’t wanna be, All by myself anymore.

Low – Kelly Clarkson

Sometimes you just need the comfort of a person who’s been there before. Step forward, Ms. Clarkson! Don’t enjoy a sombre mood on your own, indulge with Kelly!

Best lyric: Have you ever been low? Have you ever had a friend that let you down so? When the truth came out, Were you the last to know? Were you left out in the cold? What you did was low.

How Soon Is Now – The Smiths

The whine king of music, Morrissey delivers a woeful examination of gloom and misery. Fun, isn’t it? Perfect for when you’re feeling down and the whole universe is set against you.

Best lyric: When you say it's gonna happen now, well, when exactly do you mean? See, I’ve already waited too long and all my hope is gone.

Why – Annie Lennox

Why? It’s the question we all ask—after a break-up, a loss, or when your fave Jimmy Choos get caught in the sewer grate. Annie stirs our emotions with her beautifully haunting performance.

Best lyric: Do you know how I feel? ’Cause I don't think you know how I feel.

Shannon – Harry Gross

Dog lovers in the 70s were moved to tears with this top-10 hit. Written about the Irish Setter owned by Beach Boy Carl Wilson, it epitomizes pet loss. Cheesy, yes, but moving in its own special way.

Best lyric: But finally the tears fill our eyes, And I know that somewhere tonight, she knows how much we really miss her.

At Seventeen – Janis Ian

Even size 0 Hollywood starlets and over-hyped celebutantes proclaim they were butt ugly as teens. Gimme a break! Everyone (it seems!) loves a sob story and this classic is uniting Ugly Betties everywhere.

Best lyric: To those of us who knew the pain, of valentines that never came. And those whose names were never called when choosing sides for basketball. It was long ago and far away, the world was younger than today, when dreams were all they gave for free, to ugly duckling girls like me...

When She Loved Me – Sarah McLachlan

A gem of a tune from Toy Story 2. Sarah’s amazing voice just melts your heart in this tale of a once-loved doll now discarded. It’s true: teddy bears and stuffed toys do have feelings. Ever heard of the Velveteen Rabbit?

Best lyric: Lonely and forgotten, never thought she’d look my way, She smiled at me and held me, just like she used to do, Like she loved me, when she loved me.

The Long and Winding Road – The Beatles

The granddaddy of all sad songs, this McCartney/Lennon effort has no peers. An incredibly melancholy take on loss and heartbreak, no doubt Heather Mills McCartney’s been wishing that it was recorded even more frequently. Hey, it’s not everyday that you’re waiting for a divorce windfall, is it? Those royalties are just asking to be pinched!

Best lyric: But still they lead me back, to the long winding road. You left me standing here,
A long long time ago. Don’t leave me waiting here; Lead me to your door.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

Self-Righteous Break Up Songs

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 00:23:00 GMT

These self-righteous break-up songs will remind you why you dumped the dude

Despite my indie music snob background, not even I can deny the power of a good old-fashioned documentation of heartbreak, especially if it’s self-righteous. So throw away the tissues, grab your hairbrush/mic and slap on these songs – you’ll realize you can always do better than a boy who doesn’t value you in all your goddess glory.

Ex-Girlfriend – No Doubt

This is an attitude-infused punchy pop song that you can really let loose to. I say turn this one up, kick off your ratty bathrobe and do some seductive dance poses in the mirror.

Best lyric: I will be the one to burn you

Bye Bye Boyfriend – Fefe Dobson

At the start of the song, Fefe’s singing sweetly to her soon-to-be ex. By the end, the song’s infused with just the right mix of haughtiness and a know-it-all in-your-face attitude. I love it.

Best lyric: It was fun but it couldn't last forever

Shake it Off – Mariah Carey

Now, I’m the first person to be embarrassed about liking a Mariah song. But come on! It’s a proper girl anthem. It has all the elements of a good break-up song: a healthy amount of entitlement, a “you’re gonna miss me” line, but still the underlying sadness. It’s also good to know that basically everyone in the world has felt like this – even a diva like Mariah. And it’s not the end of the world, now, is it?

Best lyric: Hold up my phone’s breakin’ up / I’ma hang up and call the machine right back

Ex-Factor – Lauryn Hill

If break-up songs were people and there was a colony of break-up songs somewhere, living miserably, just tending to some crops or something, this would be the colony’s queen, dispersing good break-up advice to her songs-in-waiting. It’s a friggin classic.

Best lyric: 'Cause no one's hurt me more than you/ And no one ever will

Too Little Too Late – JoJo

Listen, if there’s anything more humbling than a twerpy 15-year-old who can concisely summarize the way I feel about my stunted relationship, please let me in on it.

Best lyric: Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)

It’s Not Right (Remix) – Whitney Houston

Whitney knows her stuff - look at what she got herself into with Bobby. This song is perfect – too bad she keeps getting back together with her crackhead lover. I love the video, too – she’s all pissed off and svelte with all her girls behind her – the best way to be when someone is breaking up with you.

Best lyric: I’d rather be alone than unhappy

Girl – Destiny’s Child

Sometimes we are weak. Sometimes the unfair sex pulls the wool over our eyes and makes us blind to all the stupid things of which they are capable. That’s when we need our girls to swoop in and back us up. This song is perfect for that - Beyonce demonstrates that a good friend ain’t afraid to slap you (but gently).

Best lyric: Girl, Take A Good Look At Yourself / He Got You Going Through Hell

Cry Me a River – Justin Timberlake

Make room for the only man on the list, JT. The delicious part of this little ditty is that we know the story behind it. A little miss ex-Federline to be exact. I guess we all know who got the last laugh there. Poor Spederline. Also see the song by the same name by Ella Fitzgerald for some old-time in your face action.

Best lyric: Now there’s just no chance / with you and me / there will never be

Smile – Lily Allen

The complete bitterness in the song coupled with trickery and self-righteousness makes a girl wanna hire some thugs and give laxatives to her ex-beau.

Best lyric: You tell me you want me back / and I tell you it don’t mean jack

Since U Been Gone – Kelly Clarkson

This song reminds me of when you, like, totally give your heart to someone and he totally STEPS ALL OVER IT and BREAKS IT and MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’LL NEVER LOVE AGAIN and DOESN’T ASK YOU TO THE PROM EVEN THOUGH HE SAID YOU’D BE TOGETHER FOREVER, then you finally get over it and realize it was a stifling relationship anyway. Yeah.

Best lyric: Since you been gone / I can breathe for the first time/ Now I get what I want

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

Stick it to the man songs

Scotch Mommy — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 23:51:00 GMT

Down with patriarchy: Girl power songs

If there’s one thing I know, it’s that girl power has nothing to do with putting down males. It’s all about realizing how great I am. Here are some songs to groove to while wearing that Spice Girls tee you have left over from high school.

Most Girls – Pink

Pink brings it with her grrrl anthem. She goes to town on golddiggers and sings the praises of true love rather than a jerk who spends a buncha billz on “floss.”

Selected lyrics: Shorty got a job/ shorty got a car/ shorty can pay her own rent

Independent Woman – Destiny’s Child

I *love* this song because the ladies in D3 are actually independent women. Beyonce is a motivating force, exuding a bunch of stuff powerful ladies should have: financial independence, confidence (even if she’s not a size minus zero), and poise.

Selected lyric: I depend on me

Bossy – Kelis ft. Too $hort

If you were to invite a few ladies over on a Saturday night, have a few drinks, then have an impromptu dance party featuring this song, I guarantee you would be extremely ready to go out and wow the fellas. Or ladies, if that’s what you’re into.

Selected lyrics: I’m the bitch y’all love to hate

40 Boys in 40 Nights – The Donnas

This song is awesome because, unlike a lot of songs that depict women as “sluts” if they have sex, the Donnas are actually unapologetic about their one night stands.

Selected lyrics: Spending every night with a different date

These Boots are Made for Walkin’ – Nancy Sinatra

Please look this video up on youtube.com. Don’t you just wanna shimmy shimmy to this retro masterpiece? Strap on your beehive and your sweaterdress and forget about Jessica whatshername. Get walkin’!

Selected lyrics: You keep thinkin that you’ll never get burned (ha!) / I just found me a brand new box of matches

Can’t Hold Us Down – Christina Aguilera featuring L’il Kim

I’ve never been a big Xtina fan, and some of her videos are less than feminist, but I have to admit this is a great song. She’s stickin it to chauvinists and taking back her sex-u-ality.

Selected lyrics: So what do we do girls? / Shout louder!

A Woman’s Worth – Alicia Keys

Doesn’t this song just give you goosebumps? Alicia’s all about demanding respect where respect is due. I love how the video for this song shows Alicia being good to her man – it’s all about equality.

Selected lyrics: Baby you know I’m worth it.

Written by: Nicolle Weeks

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Frankie Says Relax

Scotch Mommy — Wed, 14 Feb 2007 22:14:00 GMT

This music will help you de-stress like a Buddist monk

Who doesn’t have an "off" day every now and then? These songs will either help calm you down from a freak-out or boost your spirits when you see only grey. Best of all, they’re songs that let you relish life and not sweat the small stuff.

Mushaboom – Feist

The whole album is like cool elevator music that you wouldn’t feel silly tapping your foot to. Mushaboom has a breezy tone and let-it-be feel that just makes you want to go outside and play around in the snow and build snowmen.

Best lyric: Helping the kids out of their coats/Oh wait the babies haven't been born oh

California – Rufus Wainwright

What could be more soothing than thoughts of sunny skies and green palm trees? Listen closer and you’ll find that Rufus has no plans to enjoy Cali’s shiny, happy weather and instead declares that he wants to go back to bed and sleep the day away. Either option sounds like a de-stressor to me!

Best lyric: California/You're such a wonder that I think I'll stay in bed/So much to plunder that I think I'll sleep instead

Tiny Dancer – Elton John

Ever since I saw that scene in Almost Famous where the band is mad at each other and they sing this song to rediscover their love of music, it’s had an instantly calming effect: I’m almost fooled into thinking I’m a devil-may-care hippie chick from the ‘70s.

Best lyric: Blue jean baby, L.A. lady, seamstress for the band/Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man

Dreams – Fleetwood Mac

It’s partly Stevie Nicks’ hypnotic drone and partly the pared-down lyrics that speak of dreams and cleansing the soul that lulls me into a state of pure relaxation. Whatever the case, I’m practically asleep and dreaming in pure bliss by the end of the song.

Best lyric: Women they will come and they will go/When the rain washes you clean you'll know

How Sweet It Is – James Taylor

Okay, okay, high on the cheese level, I know, but that’s what’s so great about it! "How sweet it is" is so sickeningly Hallmark-card sweet that you can’t help be put in a good mood, even if you don’t have a love to call your own. Bonus points for the uplifting sax solo.

Best lyric: You brighten up for me all of my days/With a love so sweet in so many ways/I want to stop and thank you, baby

Under Pressure – Queen & David Bowie

This song just revs me up when I hear it. It’s almost gospel-like with its powerful crescendo and Bowie and Freddie Mercury’s soaring voices make me want to sing out loud, even when I’m not in the shower.

Best lyric: Pressure pushing down on me/Pressing down on you no man ask for

Such Great Heights – The Postal Service

True, the song is about love, but if you need some sun in your life, this song is like the sun coming up. Listening to the soaring lyrics, you’ll escape mundane reality and picture yourself scaling the highest mountaintops of the world.

Best lyric: They will see us waving from such great heights/ "come down now", they'll say/ but everything looks perfect from far away/"come down now", but we'll stay...

Proud Mary – Tina Turner

It starts out quietly but then builds to a powerful chorus that just makes you want to get up and dance à la Tina in What’s Love Got to Do With It. And if you know Tina’s history from that movie, the song brings a whole other level of inspiration.

Best lyric: Big wheel keep on turning/Proud Mary keep on burning/And we're rolling, rolling/Rolling on the river

Written by: Kristen Vinakmens

"Party all the time…"

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 02:42:00 GMT

Primp to this perfect party prep mix

Got an adrenaline-packed night on the cards? Dress and heels ready? Party girlfriends all set? Now you just need some tunes to boost your confidence and get you poised to be the party magnet—a Slice girl in control!

Get the Party Started – Pink

Pink is the party—and she knows it! Listen to this hit while you’re getting ready and watch that shyness vanish. Pre-party nerves? You? Never!

Best lyric: Get this party started on a Saturday night. Everybody's waiting for me to arrive.

Can’t Hold Us Down – Christina Aguilera and Lil’ Kim

Ms. Dirrrty tells it like it is! No woman should be a wall flower and Xtina and Lil’ Kim show us all how it’s done. These ladies set the tone and who are you to disobey? The girls know the score and by following their lead you’ll take that party and make it your own.

Best lyric: Take a deep breath and say it loud; Never can, never will, can’t hold us down.

Chewing Gum – Annie

This Norwegian miss ain’t no little orphan. She’s a DJ, songwriter, and popular singer, natch! Here’s an infectious song about toying with guys and always being in control. Love it!

Best lyric: I'm just a girl that's only chewing for fun. You spit it out when all the flavour has gone. Wrap him ‘round your finger like you're playing with gum.

Bootylicious – Destiny’s Child

Beyoncé and the gals do it better than anyone else. This song demands to be heard, as do these sexy women—and you, of course!

Best lyric: Better move, 'cause we've arrived. Lookin' sexy, Lookin' fly.

Doin’ the Doo – Betty Boo

Hitting it 90s style with this rap/dance track forcefully performed by one very fearless Betty Boo. She’s not taking flak from anyone! She’s everything a Slice girl should be—and then some!

Best lyric: But I’m better and a whole lot cleverer. A go-getter, you know a trend setter. I’m all the rage and all the craze.

Red Dress – Sugababes

Take three saucy Brit chicks with a penchant for putting guys in their place all the while staying true to their own beliefs and you have the Sugababes. They’re the most successful female group in UK music history.

Best lyric: Cos I'm cooler than the red dress; I'd rather catch a guy on my own (Give me credit) 'Cos what you see the man gets (Don't forget it) And if he don't I'm better off here alone.

Your Kisses Are Wasted on Me – The Pipettes

This ultra-catchy tune may sound like it’s from a different era but this girly trio is totally today. They don’t have time to spend on an unworthy guy and neither do you! If only all lessons were bound in such a fun-sized, sing-a-long worthy package. If you try putting mascara on while listening to this song you better have make-up remover handy!

Best lyric: Get out of my face, I'm gonna catch a chase, some other guy who I might like.

Into the Groove – Madonna

She’s the grand dame of girl power with this classic from the 80s flick, Desperately Seeking Susan. One of Madge’s most popular tracks, it’s guaranteed to get you party perfect in a snap.

Best lyric: Music can be such a revelation. Dancing around you feel the sweet sensation.

Do You Want To – Franz Ferdinand
It’s fun party pop at its cheeky best. Take a tip from this manifesto: be confident, fun, and sassy all at the same time.

Best lyric: I'm gonna make somebody love me, And now I know, now I know, now I know. I know that it's you. You're lucky, lucky...You're so lucky!

Groove Is in the Heart – Deee-lite
An oldie and a proven goodie. You’re going to dance and have some fun—amen! Time to grab your heels and head out into the night!

Best lyric: The chills that you, Spill up my back, Keep me filled with, Satisfaction when we're done, Satisfaction of what's to come.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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Sweat Songs

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 02:33:00 GMT

Work out to these tappin’ beats

What’s a workout without a kick-ass playlist? The treadmill can get boring after a while, but some of my best workouts have happened listening to these songs. Load them up to your MP3 and watch the digital minutes fly by.

Jump - Madonna

It starts out at a slow pace (which is great if you need a warm-up), but then moves into a rousing anthem along the lines of Madge’s classic, “Ray of Light.” If this song doesn’t get you going, I pray for you.

Best Lyric: Yes, I’m ready to jump/Just take my hands/Get ready to jump.

Gold Digger - Kanye West

Hitting the weights? This one’s perfect, ‘cause you can keep your reps in time to the wicked beat. Even though it’s a bit of a diss to a certain type of woman, the song’s super-catchy chorus makes me want to hit those weights with a vengeance.

Best Lyric: She was ‘spose to buy ya shorty TYCO with ya money/She went to the doctor got lypo with ya money

Maneater - Nelly Furtado

I can’t stop movin’ whenever this song comes on. The funky beat and catchy lyrics inspire me to feel like the sexpot maneater Nelly sings about and gets me workin’ that elliptical all fast and furious. Need I say more?

Best Lyric: C'mon everybody what you here for/Move your body around like a nympho.

Toxic - Britney Spears

You can’t go wrong with classic Britney to rev you up on the treadmill. It’s got a Bond-film vibe to it and the video, with Britney as an über-cool superheroine, brings an unmistakable cool factor. This is Britney at her bubble-gum-pop best.

Best Lyric: Too high/Can’t come down/It’s in the air/And it’s all around/Can you feel me now.

Smack My Bitch Up - Prodigy

>Want to really get moving for your workout? Picture yourself as one of the ass-kicking Angels in the first Charlie’s Angels movie, particularly the scene where the Angels beat the crap out of a bunch of bad-guys. That’s all the motivation you need.

Best Lyric: Change my pitch up/Smack my bitch up.

Momma Said Knock You Out - LL Cool J

There’s nothing like old-school hip hop to get you movin’. Hearing this song, I like to think that I’m tough chick Michelle Rodriguez from that boxing movie, Girlfight. ‘Cause how sexy is a chick who can deliver a mean left hook?

Best Lyric: Don’t call it a comeback, I’ve been here for years.

SexyBack - Justin Timberlake

Who’s bringing sexy back? You, of course! JT and Timbaland’s catchy hooks are the perfect sounds to swing you through a boring session on the elliptical machine.

Best Lyric: I think it’s special what’s behind your back/So turn around and I’ll pick up the slack.

What You Waiting For? - Gwen Stefani

When it comes to workout music, the more hard-driving the better, and this one goes above and beyond in that department. Plus, Gwen reminds you that you’re still a super-hot female, so go conquer that treadmill!

Best Lyric: Look at your watch now/You’re still a super-hot female.

Written by: Kristen Vinakmens

Swing Along in Londontown

Scotch Mommy — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 02:28:00 GMT

Tune into some Britpop for a bloomin’ good time

Some gals choose Paris, others Rome, but for this Anglophile there’s no other destination than London! Home to Big Ben, red phone boxes, and the Queen, it might feel like its feet are firmly rooted in the past but remember that this metropolis spawned the swinging 60s and the rough and ready 70s Punk rebellion—two trends that continue to influence fashion, music, and youth culture. For your enjoyment, here’s a selection of Brit-flavoured tunes.

Waterloo Sunset – The Kinks

London and The Kinks go hand in hand. You don’t have to stand atop Waterloo Bridge as it straddles the Thames to get the gist of this track. There’s a reason why this song influenced Blur’s Damon Albarn.

Best lyric: As long as I gaze on Waterloo Sunset, I am in paradise.

For Tomorrow – Blur

Blur spent the better part of three albums professing their Englishness to all and sundry. This track from their 2^nd album gives us a bird’s eye view of a troubled relationship between the quintessential London couple.

Best lyric: Take a drive to Primrose Hill, it’s windy there and the view’s so nice.

LDN– Lilly Allen

You have to love Lilly Allen! The girl comes by her brash British perspective by blood: her dad is Brit actor Keith Allen (he’s the nude dead guy in the Ewan McGregor flick, Shallow Grave). Lilly serves up UK girl power for a whole new generation with this sassy take on her fave city.

Best lyric: Sun is in the sky, oh why, oh why would I wanna be anywhere else?

I Like London in the Rain – Blossom Dearie

Fancy a 60s seasoned night out skipping around Soho in the heart of London’s west end. Grab your brolly for a splashy dash! The rainy weather—and goodness knows London gets its fair share—doesn’t dampen the spirits of Blossom as she dances through puddles en route to a night-time adventure.

Best lyric: Turn the city upside down, liquid pictures of the town. How I fancy misty hours on a rainy thoroughfare. I like London with umbrellas everywhere!

Down in the Tube Station at Midnight – The Jam

In the late 70s, The Jam was the soundtrack to the Mod revival. This song places us in the rough and tumble world of clashing youth culture.

>Best lyric: I'm down in the tube station at midnight. Don't want to go down in a tube station at midnight.

London Belongs to Me – Saint Etienne

To many Brit music fans, this group epitomizes London. Many a song is inspired by their love of their hometown. As refreshing as a breezy summer’s day spent reclining on a canvas deck chair in Hyde Park

Best lyric: Took the tube to Camden Town. Walked down Parkway and settled down. In the shade of the willow tree, someone hovering over me.

Swinging London – Hazy Osterwald Jet Set

Funky punky German band’s enthusiastic ode to Chelsea, Charing Cross, the BBC, Trafalgar Square...everything, everywhere London! Love the Big Ben “ding dong, ding dong”! Groovy, baby!

Best lyric: Everywhere it’s in the air...Swinging London!

Let’s All Go Down the Strand – Blur

While the members from Blur were wrapping themselves in the Union Jack in preparation for their war with Oasis, they recorded this traditional, jaunty sing-a-long. The result: a modern ode to this central London thoroughfare.

Best lyric: Let’s all go down the Strand, Oh what a happy land!

England Swings – Roger Miller

This tune is one that your parents or Gran might know. Harking back to the 70s, American Roger Miller offers up a cartoon-y, postcard view of the country. Much like a comfy ride atop a double-decker Routemaster bus, we get an introductory tour of all things typically British. Cheesy, yes, but loaded with fun!

Best lyric: England swings like a pendulum do. Bobbies on bicycles two by two. Westminster Abbey, the Tower, Big Ben…the rosy red cheeks of the little children.

Bar Italia – Pulp

Pulp calls it a night at the ultra-trendy Bar Italia café on Frith Street. It’s teeny and chock full of customers but it’s the real deal. Fancy a cuppa? Head on over and park your Vespa neatly by the curb!

Best lyric: There's only one place we can go. It's around the corner in Soho, where other broken people go. Let's go.

Written by: Jackie Middleton

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