Boring!

Nothing is more boring as when a women fakes it! If she is faking that what else is she faking? Her love for you?

I agree totally with the writer above. Learn how to make yourself orgasm first. Then use your boyfriend to help you achieve that by taking control and doing it yourself if you have too.
That will turn him on!

well if it bothers you that you didn't know what it was then you should tell him he will understand

Maybe it's time to try something different; introduce toys, or different positions, this way, you can learn more about what you may or may not like without hurting your boyfriend's ego. While honesty is the best policy, you were probably just faking your orgasms because you didn't want to hurt him. There's no sense in doing that now that you've gotten yourself into the habit of faking them. If you take the time to figure out what you like via, something different or M***ion, you'll do yourselves both a favour, and hopefully you'll finally get to experience the much anticipated orgasm.

wow i so know how u feel try having him go down on u for awhile then right before u get off go right to sex but make sure he start off slow it worked for me

Honesty is always the best policy. You're going to need to be extremely tactful, but no matter how you word it, you're going to crush him...

Theres always the option of practicing until you get it right and then just get him to do what you have learned on how to "O".

There was absolutely no benefit to faking an orgasm for either party.

I think and agree with most people honesty is the best way and it will make ur relationship a lot easier for the both of you.I think you should take it slow little by little untill you and your partner both feel confortable, and then Im sure no one will fake it , because you wont need to, you will both feel confortable with each other.And i think that would be the best and the easiest.Thats all I have to say.

i was in the exact same situation with my boyfriend.. i didn't tell him about faking because i was to afraid to crush him.. i just suggested new and interesting things.. toys different positions. he was amazed and we now both enjoy sex so much more

The very first thing you should do, is make sure that you can trust him. If so, than just be honest and come out and say it, I am sure he will understand you.

Oh boy I was in that boat once. When you first start having sex and you're new at it, you don't really know what you'll enjoy. Women forget that they can still enjoy sex without having an orgasm everytime, but they sure are fun.

So now you're faced with the problem of fessing up that you faked a year's worth of sex. Or you can take control and learn how to do it yourself and just guide him. He'll just think you learnt something new and maybe get only a little suS***ious but will probably be thankful you saved his feelings.

The only way I say that you can have the Big O is that you and your boyfriend have to have the same sexual desire and be in tune with each other if your both intune with each other and he knows how to please you and take it slow and go down on you the right way you will have the Big O and you have to relax and enjoy the sex.

Girl don't tell him. It will just give him something to hold against you earlier. Besides you spent all this time trying to protect his ego and that would just wreck all that effort.

Go to the store. Buy a toy that vibrates and teach yourself. because you are missin out.

My first one was with a toy...a little vibrating egg. Lol After about a month I finally had enough and decided I should probably leave my bedroom.

I didn't have orgasms for a years after I had sex. I think it has something to do with getting to know your own body...that's why self-exploration is needed. Now I have them....only if I'm on top...I guess what I do is just close my eyes and get lost in the feeling, or sometimes I can do it with my eyes open if he's doing something majorly hot. Just concentrate on what feels good and keep doing it. Don't over think it tho, just feel. Eventually...it comes.

Im sorry but from experience. Honesty is not the way to go here. I told my b/f i faked it once and now everytime we have sex he askes me if i had the big "O" and if i say yes he doesnt believe me, if i say no he freaks out. More so on himself then on me, but either way it sucks.

So instead, do different things. Try different positions. It turns guys on when girls get creative in the bedroom. And fingures crossed, you reach the big "O".

Honesty is the best policy here. As a guy, if we're not pleasing you, we'd like to know how. Notice I didn't just say "We'd like to know." Every woman is different in terms of what pleases her, and it's very VERY sexy for us to be guided / used to experiment for your pleasure. Since you've been 'lying' for awhile . . . it might help if you approach things in a "I want to know what pleases you" manner to start things off.

Firstly, you do need to fess up, but you can do it easily, just like others are saying, teach yourself first, the one night just have the talk when your comfortable, let him know you haven't been reaching orgasm alot.. and then tell him you played with yourself and learned what you like, would he like to see? belive me he's going to forget about the faked it, and run to the bedroom to find out what you been doing when your alone :).
men love to watch, and you can take his hand and show him how to touch you and where, it's really a turn on for them, and you if you relax. faking it robs both of you of enjoyment, he really wants to make you feel good, but mostly, just concentrate on feeling.. and let the O come when it does, there doesn't always have to be a big O.

I do think that you should be honest with your guy. But, not just for the sake of being honest. What if your response to an orgasm if very different than the response you've been showing your man for the past year?
He'll be suS***ious once you actually get there. So, my advice would by, just tell him.

I don't think I would tell him that I have been faking it the entire time. There is nothing to make a man feel less manly than telling him that he didn't really "do much" for you.

A lot to do with women reaching an orgasm is in themselves. I think you have to find what really runs you on and then you can run with it. Unlike men, with women, things are sometimes a little more in our head than actually physically. This is good for you, because you can explore things even without your partner. Think about what turns you on and go with it. When you are having sex with your partner, you can translate some of that sexual imagery and I think it might help.

But most important, you have to trust before you can have a good orgasm, at least that is my experience.

Tah
and good luck

WOW, such a interesting question and yet it is seen all the time. I wouldn't necessarily pull out the whole honesty card at this point and time. Like mentioned above a man's Ego has allot to loose from knowledge such as this. BUT ladies at the same point and time getting yourself into a situation like this only makes for Further problems down the road confront it asap.

Now i know for quite a few women their want for the orgasm is so great that they really arent comfortable with what is going on with to begin.
By this i mean GET OUT of your head stop analyzing and get into what your doing. Sexual climax for a woman is most likely going to come at your most comfortable point with your least expectancy.

I have not had the amazing big "O" yet..
My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 6 1/2 months.. and sex is great! He's great! To answer someones comment on here where they said that once they are feeling like they are almost reaching that climax, and all of a sudden its lost... Oh trust me- right when i knew it was going to happen. It wasn't my fault for falling... it was my boyfriend. although he didn't mean to. it was because he was continuously doing a certain motion --- right when i was almost to my climax. He had done something different that had stopped it.. since then, i haven't had one... so for that women who had left that comment... I would say speak up and say something because i have and it works! If your partner knows what you want.. you learn more about one anothers sexual desires

A) UR JUST NOT THAT INTO HIM... U MAY LOVE HIM BUT JUST NOT IN THAT KINDA WAY... TAKE A BREAK FROM HIM AND SEE WHAT ELSE IS OUT THERE IM NOT SAYING TO GO SCREW SOMEBODY BUT STOP LYING TO URSELF AND JUST ADMIT THAT U CAN DO BETTER...WHO CARES IF U LOST IT TO HIM... NOBODY CARES ABOUT THAT S*** ANYMORE!

B)DO NOT TELL HIM!! GUYS DON'T NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING

I read on the internet that some girls weren't able to have orgasms until they were about 30. I dont know if it is the case with you, but you never know.
When or if, you tell your boyfriend you've been faking, be nice about it, and let him know its not his fault. I mean, it would bring some guys down to hear that, but just let him know.

Try To have So Some fun and see what happens. If nothing happens you should tell him. Like you said you guys been going out for a year, you shouldn't be lying to him!

im sorry if u guys hate me but it happens for me aall the time,bcos i relax and enjoy it!!

I completely agree with relaxing and not thinking about it. It's like watching the clock tick down before its time to go home from work. Once you've got your mind set on it you can't stop thinking about it and you obsess until it happens.
Try doing something completely non-sex related with your partner before feeling the desire to get under the sheets(even though you can't always predict when that might happen). How long has it been since you put your head on his lap and just talked. Just talking with each other, regardless of how long you've been together always allows a couple to connect even further than they already are. Theres always something new you can learn. That emotional connection, I believe, will help with the physicalness of the relationship. Don't think about the big O, don't think about the act of sex, think about the one your with, pour yourself into that person. Before you know it, all the O-someness you've wanted is right before you and you didn't see it coming.

I agree that in order to achieve an orgasm with a partner you might want to try it on your own at first. I mean get to know your arousal points. Also, you have to be really aroused to have one. If you're not turned on then there is no point in trying to get there. Keep relaxed, and enjoy the act.

This is a lesson for girls never to fake.

I disagree with the answer that she should M***e. Some girls, myself included, are not comfortable M***ing, or basically, having sex with ourselves. For whatever reason. And I feel a pressure to do it in order to get familiar with my body.

When I didn't have an orgasm, that was the only advice I got. Well, I am just uncomfortable doing that. It took a long time, a year until he perfected it, but my bf finally figured it out. (And by the way girls, orgasms are overrated.. but an interesting experience.)

I don't think that a girl needs to M***e. She can experiment WITH a guy. What's the harm in that??

no i hate it .well it depense on hoe derty it is .

Because im just their thinking eewww
thats just nasty.

ARE U CRAZY NEVER EVER EVER FAKE AN ORGAMS I DONT CARE HOW GOOD U WANT TO MAKE HIM FEE BUT DON NOT FAKE THAT TELL HIM THAT U DIDNT FEEL THE PLEASURE AND HE WILL MAKE DAMN GOOD SURE U FELL IT HE WILL ANY GUY WHO DOESNT IS NOT WORTH IT IN MY BOOKS.............BESIDES IT MIGHT BE A STRONGER ORGASM FOR HIM TOO

Wow! I just came upon this Slice archive about womens' orgasms and I can't believe some of the advice I have read. Women telling other women to fake it and other women simply putting up with it - this is just SO wrong! I consider it a point of pride that I can bring my wife to orgasm orally, its a great turn-on for me. Final word to ALL the ladies - demand satisfaction in your sex life!

Having an orgasm, a real full blown one takes time and comfort.

A lot of women are pre-orgasmic for different reasons: past traumas, fears of letting go, discomfort,etc etc.

Not to sound awful, but sometimes its that the partner just doesn't work for you.

I spent five years not being comfortable to orgasm with a boyfriend. Partly, I was scared of what could happen, and partly he just didn't do it for me. I spent that time faking, and it was a very unsatisfactory relationship...after i left him, and found a man I was comfortable with, things get a lot better.

i would say that the key is comfort.
Faking only leads to frustration.

imo...some of you women need to learn to give yourselves an orgasm....all you have to do is close your eyes, relax, dream and gently rub yourselves...just lie back and let it happen, its so easy......make it happen for yourselves first on a regular basis and then it will happen so much easier during intimate moments with your partner...and btw sn...orgasms are not over rated...its one of life's most spectacular sensations...but of course they vary in feel and intensity, however its like fine wine, you don't notice the difference until your palette is more discerning...but dont worry sn, your a bit of a rookie obviously but with a little more practice and experience you might be able to taste the difference from one wine to the next.....

I know you don't want to make him feel bad, but you're going to have to tell him you've been faking. But make sure you tell him the whole story. Explain that it's not his fault, but you really didn't know any better. He will be disappointed that he wasn't doing as well as he thought, but at the same time he'll be gratified that you felt you could confide in him.

Now, if you want to, do some experimental M***ion before you tell him, so you will have an idea what he can do to help you reach the big "O". But either way, you have to be willing to tell him what you like and don't like so he can learn.

Good luck.

I had sex with my friends mom imfront of my friend

I've been there.. Your guy will be more happy having sex when he knows hes making you happy than not. Try new things!!! Or Help yourself out during sex.. a lot of women can't orgasm just though intercourse.. Learn what you like and suggest it to your bf.

best thing to do is grow your
penis

sn, there is nothing wrong with a girl m***ting, its an excellent way to get to know your body and and discouver what turns you on. But if your uncomfortable with it thats fine too( its not like someone can force you to m***e). It also good 'orgasim practice', what i mean by that is that by m***ting regularly, you can achieve a more powerful orgasim with your partner and enhance your sex life ;)

lol. Well don't be like me, I faked it for three years..and you know what happened when he finally made me cum! I cried, and laughed at the same time.. I was almost hysterical actually..best thing ever!! But i'm pretty sure I frightened the poor boy. Anyway, I decided after..three years that i would just shut the f* up, and not moan, not fake..not make a peep until he was doing something I liked...then I kept that going. It proved to be wrong cause sometimes I would be quiet the entire time and he would think something was wrong compared to the usual first 15 minutes of intense moaning..lol(little does he know i would jack off after anyway to fulfill my needs)..
Anyway! I eventually told him, and we're still working on being completely honest about what I like, and what will take me there. Def get a vibrator if you wanna know what cuming feels like;) Just be nice and make sure you tell him how great his penis and fingers and toung are...you just need him to listen while ou moan his name to lick you harder or faster or slower! It can be hot..so don't worry;)

As a man i have been so lucky to never fail at helping my partners achieve this goal. and honestly some are harder then others but its still common sense for the guy.

play around first. dont skip oral. while we do it we need to listen and pay attention to your reaction while we try different things, i just go for what is obviously working for her and then intensify it over a period of time.

play it by ear. and dont be afraid to ask for suggestions in a confident yet curious way.

Here's something you might want to try for yourself during penetration and he will totally love it.
Keaggel exercises, they are the contractions of inner muscles.
it is an exercise you learn when you are pregnant to strenghten those muscles.
when you use it during sex it is pretty incredible.
to practice feeling the muscle first do it when you go for a pee, try interrupting the flow after you've started, do it a few times. when you have learned how to contract that muscle. you won't want to give it up and it will be useful to you in more then one way through out your life.

I had the exact same problem with my boyfriend. I just flat out told him and although he was upset, he was kind of happy too because it gave us a chance to try new positions, bring toys into the bedroom and we really got to know what we liked. Now I have the Big 'O' everytime we get down and dirty.

Using Keaggel exercises may produce the BIG "O" but you'll be doing all the damn work. You need to tell him, straight out. If your not his first he knows your faking and does not care, because a real man will be able to feel your body contract with the BIG"O".

Honestly, I have ma*****ated, and it is the ONLY way I can get off now. No matter what my bf does while we are doing 'it' nothing works. I was told to get to know myself, so I tried it and now it's the only way I get off. So everytime my bf and I have sex, I have to finish myself off after we are done and he is asleep :(
It really sucks so I would suggest talking to him and trying to introduce vibrators or whatever you want to intensify the sensation. If you do try mas****ion, don't do it so often that you depend on it.

when i hear of women who have trouble reachng climax, i always think to myself, well they definitely aren't very open with their partner or very comfortable with themselves. and i say this b/c, if you have such an open relationship(verbally), it shouldnt be a problem to communicate with your partner that more attention needs to be devoted to you during sex, or its time for different methods(b/c naturally it takes longer for us to reach an orgasm). But for women who feel it coming, but just miss...remember he has an orgasm everytime! sex ends when he's climaxed..why shouldnt it be that way for us? why cant a guy's goal actually be...im not stopping(or going) until shes had an orgasm. it comes down to you women!! open up with your partner, get to know yourself on an intimate level, and you'll only reap the benefits!

I believe it is NOT FAIR not to be able to have the same pleasure a man has in bed. Women are 'double victims': not only that they don't have this pleasure but they have to go through the humiliation of admiting it in a manner that wont 'hurt his feelings'. Girls, we all DESERVE to have an orgasm when we have sex! It is our right, dont accept anything less. Do something about it yourself and, if necessary, change the man. There are very good books about orgasm out there, get one or get other kind of help immediatly. Good luck!

I agree with the person with the question unfortunately I find myself in a similiar circumstance... I never faked it though, it just does not happen as often as I would like...and wha do you say that would not hurt someone you care about?.I am interested in the lesson learned from this. Seems I am in the same boat...the waiting for it to change really sucks...and very very frustrating...I guess there need to be some chat about it...even though it is rather uncomfortable...I like him.

'It was a great turnout, there are lots of vendors here and tons of Valentine\x27s Day gifts,\x22 said Sarah Forbes-Roberts, co-owner of the co-operative. It was the first year for the crafts fair.'