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I can't tell if a guy at the gym likes me

Q: There is this amazingly good looking guy at the gym I attend, we are both always there at the same time. Whenever I pass by him he smiles at me, and I smile back at him. We both do that 'I'm not looking but I'm really looking at you' glance, so I'm wondering if he's interested in me. why hasn't he asked me out? Or should I ask him out?

A: I wouldn’t jump to asking him out, but I would pull the old, “Excuse me, is this elliptical trainer in use?” Get a machine beside his and strike up a conversation. You should know pretty quickly if his come-hither glances were the real thing or just the testosterone talking. - Josh

A: Gym goers are slaves to routine so I wouldn’t read too much into your being there at the same time. And without seeing these “I’m not looking but I’m really looking at you” glances first-hand, it’s hard to say whether this person specifically is into you. And, not to completely burst your bubble, but a smile from other gym goers—the same faces you see every time you’re there—isn’t confirmation they want to date you. Your best bet is to see whether he’s at the gym to work out or to pick up. Does he wear earphones? Does he take them off when he’s working out near you? Does he keep his head down and concentrate on his routine or do his eyes wander for 10 minutes between sets? If he seems open to conversation then one day chat him up. Then chat him up the next day, which will be so much easier as you two now have this “history”. If he still seems more into chats than squats, ask him out for a coffee. - Sergio

A: I think some natural conversation at the weight stack or on the cardio machines is all that is required. I’m sure he doesn’t want to be labelled the guy trying to score chicks at the gym so he’s hesitant on making a move. You have the benefit of already being in a social atmosphere and you don’t have the pressure of a date interrupting good conversation, use it and then make your decision about a date after. - Richard

A: Well, if he likes looking at you so much, he probably wants to get to know you a bit better. He could be shy or maybe he thinks it’s sleazy to pick up a girl at the gym. Or maybe he’s married. You never know. If you really want to know what the situation is, go say hi! - Chauncy

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Comments:

Must guys that go to the gym are in the sales feild , so they tend to be plsent to everyone , my guess is if he is good looking he is taken :)

annaboi
Tuesday, 27 October 2009 14:05 PM EST

i think you should just wait for him to say something and if its a yes and then u guys do start to go ou but if its a no then just try and move on

Anonymous
Saturday, 21 November 2009 21:37 PM EST

i think that you should always make the guy come to you instead of going to him, no matter how good lookin he may be?(=

toba
Thursday, 26 November 2009 15:12 PM EST

Wow...same situation pretty much to a t...and this guys not married I’ve checked. He gets me extremely hot and bothered, its a little hard to concentrate on my own workout I’m more focused on nonchalantly glancing at him. Thanks for the insight boys I’ll have to attempt to look away from his biceps to see if he is doing any of the things you mentioned.

CoCo3
Monday, 30 November 2009 23:44 PM EST

There are no rules. If you want something go for it. Just walk up and introduce yourself. Or stand beside him and purrr...lol..

Steve
Friday, 04 December 2009 08:37 AM EST

Maybe he's just being nice. Wow didn't know a guy cant smile to a female without thinking they are interested in them. Maybe the guy is married, has a girlfriend, or engaged. Sorry to say but soemtimes there ARE guys out there that are just nice and not looking for anyone, cuz they already have someone at home.

Dan3
Monday, 14 December 2009 20:10 PM EST

"Make the guy come to you" What is this the early 19th century? Women's liberation happened a long time ago. If you find the guy attractive go for it, strike up a conversation. If he likes you great, if he doesn't at least you now know. Good luck!

emily
Monday, 08 March 2010 19:05 PM EST

Wow, you must be pretty young and naive to think just cause a guy smiles at you hes interested....I'm female and taken and when I'm at the gym you get to know the regulars and you do say hello to those you recognize from going there. Believe me he will hit on you or talk to you if hes interested. Most gym rats are superficial and a good majority of them males and females are so full of it they cant focus on anyone but themselves.....I've dated many a gym rat....and most of them stink!!!! Several dates on the go...never serious

kelly3
Sunday, 14 March 2010 15:27 PM EST

why not ask him out, sister if you wait to long it might never happen, heck its the 20th century. I met my guy and my true soulmate because i was the one that engaged in the conversation.
so go on talk to him your self

mari3
Thursday, 22 April 2010 12:16 PM EST

Here's what you do...
Conviniently place yourself next to the guy for part of the workout so that it would be impossible for him not to at least notice your presence. Go do other things and then keep coming back. Once you feel a bit more comfortable around the guy strike up a conversation like, "so are you training for something in particular?" and be ready to answer the same question in an interesting way that prolongs the conversation because after he answers he'll probably say, "what about you?".
Then leave it at that unless he turns out to be a real chatter box. Try to leave before he does and say "bye" and give him a nice big smile.
Enjoy!

insight3
Tuesday, 27 July 2010 12:57 PM EST

give him the ultimatum: look at him and send him a huge smile for 4-5 seconds. that's how long it takes for him to register that you're romantically interested. once you've done that, if he doesn't make a move, he's gay, taken, or not interested. if so, keep being friendly to him and bag one of his friends! :)

anon3
Wednesday, 01 September 2010 16:04 PM EST

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